I turned to the side as I checked myself out in the mirror for the sixth time in less than six minutes. I was certain that my make up was cute and simple and I smelled good. As I checked to make sure that I was good to go, I asked myself the same question that I had been asking myself since 3pm; "Am I really doing this?"When I had agreed to come to Hayley's movie night I had not meant it. What reason did I have to be there anyway? It was obvious that she liked Nico and he was probably giving her all that attention to get under my skin.I hated it. I told myself that I hated it because Nico was using an innocent girl to feel better but that was never the reason. Nico was not a user and I was hiding from the actual emotion.I was jealous. It felt like she was going after Nico, no, she was going after Nico. She had made it abundantly clear that she liked him and she was unafraid to show it.It reminded me of the way that Nico liked me. The fact that she had the same love language and
"You'll get over her eventually, bro,'' the words of my older cousin replayed in my head as I sat alone at a coffee shop within campus, "You just gotta give it time. Getting over things like this take time"It didn't feel like I was ever going to get over Rita or this throbbing pain in my chest that had, though reduced in intensity had not vanished.I was hurt and I missed the one person that was causing me pain.I had summoned up the courage to delete the photos of her that I had in my head but I didn't know an app that would help delete the memories that we shared.Most times, my mind would replay the scene where I saw her alight from the Rolls Royce that Friday night with a tall, handsome stranger in a suit.I should have known then that I had lost her and it was game over for me. I think I may have known that deep down but was too scared to admit the truth to myself. When I heard that she was in a relationship I lost it. I was angry at her, at everything and especially at myself
She was so perfect. Every single detail about this woman sitting next to me screamed perfection. I had always heard the rumors that most of the members of the Lane family had great looks and they all turned out to be true.At least, if they all looked as good as Rita did then I would know that the rumors were true. She had decided to dye her hair a shade of red that complimented her skin and her eyes.It especially went well with that green dress that she was wearing. Her head was resting on the window while she gazed outside at pedestrians and other cars.I watched her with so much admiration. I couldn't help but think back to the night that she had agreed to be my woman. She was so beautiful and the first night that we made love I could have sworn that God himself was blessing me.She had a body that needed to be shown at the greatest art gallery in the world.She was everything that I had wanted in a woman and she was just right next to me. Yet, even at that she seemed so far aw
"I'm just saying that it would be a good idea if we could meet this person and just get to know them"My grandmother had tried to plead her case for the third time that week. She had been among the first people in the family to recover from the news that I was actually gay and now she wanted me to introduce my boyfriend to the family.It was such an unexpected request and I was worried that it may backfire and not have the intended result that she hoped for."Grandma, I am not inviting Alex over for dinner""And why not?""Because, Paul""You shouldn't call your father by his first name, Collin that is disrespectful"I let out a frustrated sigh."Please, Grandma, don't start""You know that I love you and you know that your family loves you regardless of who you choose to fuck""Grandma"I laughed since the first time that we began this conversation. The last time that I had heard her use a vulgar word, I was fourteen and suspended for breaking the principal's windshield."What? I am
Today was the day. The day that I would finally get to be in the same room with him; my Alex. He was meant to come to my office so we could discuss the paper and if he would review my other options.I hoped that over time Alex wouldn't seem so nervous whenever he came around. He looked like a cute deer caught in headlights. I did hope that maybe, overtime he would ease up more around me.I was ready and excited. It had been a long time since I was this happy to see someone and have a conversation with them. I heard the small warning in my head that I needed to be careful. Wasn't this how it starts? The first warning signs that I could be falling for this boy. I stopped while adjusting my tie in the mirror. Was this a warning sign really?I had caught myself a few times smiling at nothing while thinking about him but didn't think much of it.Was I falling for Alexander Mongroove? Did it matter?I sighed, picked up whatever essentials that I needed for the day and headed downstairs. Ma
I lay my head on his thighs and shut my eyes as I felt his fingers run through my hair. I had missed this; Little, precious moments with him that felt so welcoming, so safe.Alex had jumped on me the minute that Nico had let me into the dorm. I had been with anyone that looked that happy to be around me. He was practically glowing and it made me feel really guilty for lying to him the way that I did.Nico had left to go see someone; or at least that's what he said but I knew that he just wanted to give us some privacy and I really appreciated that. I missed Alex and more than anything I was glad to have some alone time with him, far from the troubles of my life and my family.It had been a lot these past few days. My grandmother had convinced to come back to the family mansion and see if I could find common ground with my father but that proved to be a waste of time after we got into our fifth official fight since his return.He had lost his temper when I wouldn't budge about my sexua