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Penulis: Aya Starr
last update Terakhir Diperbarui: 2025-05-05 18:17:38

PRESENT DAY

Coleen

“Coleen freaking Miane? Are you ready yet?”

I turned back to find my Mark standing at the doorway. His floppy blonde hair flattered him, making him look like the golden retriever that he was. Right now though, he had a frown of annoyance on his face that seemed almost humorous.

An exasperated sigh left me as I turned to my packed bag.

“I'm almost done,” I said, even though my heart still felt heavy.

I heard him move closer before his arms wrapped around me

“Don't think too much about it.” he murmured against my neck, “all those bad days are over. This is a fresh start for both of us,”

“Easy for you to say, Mr music prodigy,?” I nudged him teasingly, but I couldn't deny that what he said was true.

Not long after getting the news of our scholarship we moved into the city, getting an apartment and setting up everything else in advance. We'd spent the entire summer break here, preparing for its resumption whether it was going to prep classes, touring the college or exploring the city.

Everything felt new and refreshing here, far away from the town I'd grown up in. Away from the hellish memories of high school. Of Chase and… Hayden.

I was now starting anew, moving past those days, and today was going to be the official start of my new life.

Smiling at him, I immediately stood up, handing him my bag.

“I'll race you out of the building,” I said before moving past him, rushing out my room.

After the fun moment we arrived at the college. Despite being here several times already my heart still leapt anytime I saw the name.

Domino's college's. One of the most prestigious private colleges. All my hard work has been to get here and I finally was.

Due to our separate majors. I took my classes separately from Mark. It didn't matter much though as I threw myself fully into college life. It felt completely like a dream to be there.

Midway through one of my classes, I made a new acquaintance in the form of Lisa.

“There's a freshers party happening tonight. I'd love it if you came with me and had fun.” she smiled.

Hesitation gripped me at their thought. I was never one for parties or extravagance, yet in the face of her enthusiastic smile I stopped myself.

This was the new me. I had to let loose.

“Okay,” I said, receiving her hug in response.

After the classes, I took a detour to change into the closest thing to party clothes that I had, a little black dress. Meeting up with Lisa at the college gates, she quickly led me towards the party.

It was as I expected. Loud but somehow with her by my side it didn't feel bad. As she presented me with a cup full of some unknown alcoholic concoction I couldn't even bring myself to care as I downed it.

Shortly after, the buzz hit me And I truly began to enjoy the party.

I giggled as I stumbled and danced against the sweaty crowd, the strobe lights hypnotizing. I could have sworn I'd lost Lisa in the mix as I traversed through the party but what did it matter?

If this was what college was about, I loved it.

Stepping out of the crowd, I stumbled into a hard warm frame I vaguely recognized as a person and felt arms wrap around my waist.

“Hello.” His deep voice made me shiver . Looking up at him a string of attraction filled me. He looked handsome.

“Hello stranger,” I giggled against him. Somehow he seemed familiar…

The thought slipped away as his arms tightened. Slowly I was pulled into a dance, words leaving me. Before suddenly, his lips fell on mine.

“Wanna go upstairs?” He murmured and I found myself nodding.

Everything else became a blur. I found myself taken out of the crowd, led through the throng of people before being alone in a room. Kissing him , I pulled him closer, savoring him. I wanted more… more…

And then…darkness.

….

I groaned against the lights as I opened my eyes. My head was pounding but I could recognize the rays of sunlight that told me it was morning. The events of last night slowly slipped in and I stiffened.

The party…the kissing and then-

Looking down at my naked frame covered with a blanket, I could already guess what happened with growing panic. A groan beside me however made me stiffen.

That voice. I remembered it.

The blurry memory of his face reached my mind, filling me with horror.

No, it couldn't be him. Anybody but him.

I turned to the side and my heart sank instantly.

A sleeping, naked Hayden Michaels was right beside me.

I'd had a one night stand with Hayden. The one I thought I'd left in town miles away.

“Oh god,” I whispered to myself before rushing out of the bed. Through my panic, I had a clear goal.

I had to go.

I put in my scattered clothes frantically, rushing out of the room before he could wake up and leaving the building. As I rushed into the streets towards my apartment, thoughts barraged me.

I had slept with Hayden. The same Hayden who made my life hell. He wasn't supposed to be here.

I stopped in place on the sidewalk as the thought pierced my mind.

Why the was he here?

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  • The Hockey Star Regret    012

    HAYDENI’d never admit this to Alicia or anyone, but I’d started memorizing Coleen’s schedule.It wasn’t as creepy as it sounded. Okay, maybe it was a little creepy but it wasn’t like I was stalking her. I just… had this need to be aware of what she was up to.Honestly, it was a miracle I’d been able to keep this up without her knowledge. Not to talk of the fact that it was so fucking difficult to do given my class and practice schedule but I’ve somehow been able to make it work.Ever since that conversation in the library, something had shifted between us. She still kept me at arm’s length, but it wasn’t like the iron wall it used to be. And if there was a chance that Coleen was going to give me even the slightest opening, I wasn’t about to waste it.But something about her had felt off lately. When she smiled, it didn’t reach her eyes as usual. She also flinched at sudden sounds and checked her phone like she was waiting for a bomb to go off.I knew what fear looked like and Coleen

  • The Hockey Star Regret    011

    COLEENThere were days when I felt like I was finally adjusting to college. When the air didn’t feel so heavy with anxiety and I could walk into a lecture hall without scanning for a particular pair of hazel eyes.This was not one of those days.“Tell me again why you’re refusing to come,” Mark said for the third time as he dramatically sprawled across the beanbag in our living room, chewing on a Twizzler.“Because,” I said, not looking up from my laptop, “I’m two chapters behind in my reading, my back still hurts from working on the field, and I’m not in the mood to fake smile at strangers tonight.”“You wound me,” he said, clutching his chest. “This isn’t just any event. It’s the first open mic night of the semester. You know, music, food, awkward poetry from people who overshare… It’s a rite of passage.”I snorted. “You just want to get on stage and sing so the cute girls swoon.”He wiggled his eyebrows. “Guilty. But seriously, you need to stop hiding in here like a recluse. It’s n

  • The Hockey Star Regret    010

    HAYDENPractice was hell.I don’t mean the usual kind where your muscles burn and your lungs fight for air and the coach’s whistle feels like a scream in your eardrums. No, this was a different kind of hell.The kind where your head's a fucking mess and your body refuses to cooperate.Every time I dropped back to throw, I felt like her eyes were on me even though she wasn’t there. Every time I ran a drill, I kept hearing her voice in that lecture hall. Coleen Maine was haunting me.“Michaels!” Coach Thompson’s voice thundered across the field. “What in God's name was that throw? My grandmother could make a tighter spiral!”I gritted my teeth, yanked off my helmet, and ran a frustrated hand through my sweat-soaked hair.“Sorry, Coach,” I muttered, already knowing I looked like crap out there.“You’re not even trying today!” he barked, storming toward me like a linebacker on a mission. “What’s going on with you?”“Just having a rough morning,” I said, avoiding eye contact.Coach folded

  • The Hockey Star Regret    009

    COLEENSometimes, pride had to be swallowed, even if it burned all the way down.I didn’t want to admit it, not even to myself, but my bank account was in the red zone. Between textbooks, and the occasional splurge on microwave noodles that weren’t the cheapest brand, I was barely hanging on.Not to talk of the financial hit I took when Mark and I agreed to rent a two-bedroom off-campus apartment.So, after spending the better part of a night staring at my empty wallet and ignoring the dull ache in my stomach, I finally did what I’d been avoiding, I walked into the student employment office on campus and asked for a job.The receptionist, a guy with square glasses and tired eyes, barely looked up from his computer screen when I stepped in. “Name?”“Coleen Maine,” I replied.He typed something with the enthusiasm of a slug and let out a long sigh. “Let me check what’s available for your year and schedule.”I shifted awkwardly on the cheap linoleum tiles while he tapped away. Every seco

  • The Hockey Star Regret    008

    COLEENI hadn’t slept.The night crawled by in a haze of embarrassment, replaying my outburst in class on a loop in my head. My voice cracking. My heart racing. The silence that followed. Hayden’s face, confused, almost guilty. And worst of all, the way the whole room looked at me like I was two seconds from combusting.This wasn’t how I imagined college going. It wasn’t even close.I curled deeper under my sheets, hoping for some kind of divine intervention. Maybe the ground could swallow me whole or I’d wake up in an alternate timeline where I’d kept my mouth shut and hadn’t exploded in front of my classmates.But the sun kept rising and the responsibility of going to school knocked like an annoying landlord.By 8:00 a.m., I was sitting up in bed with dark circles under my eyes and a knot in my stomach the size of a boulder. There was no way around it, if I wanted to survive this school, this scholarship, this life I was clawing toward, I had to face what happened.I showered, dress

  • The Hockey Star Regret    007

    HAYDENToday couldn’t have gone any worse.My attempts at speaking with Coleen went to absolute shit and I couldn’t even place my finger on how it went fucking wrong.Since I found out that Coleen and I went to the same college, I haven’t been able to get her out of my fucking mind.It’s like she put a spell on me or something. The guys on the football team heard about the disaster that was today, and it was all they could tease me about during practice.When I got my acceptance letter for a full-ride football scholarship to Domino's University, it was like a dream come true.This school was my first choice, and even though all my parents could care about was the fact that it wasn't Harvard, I couldn't care less.I had earned my place in this school. This wasn’t handed to me because of who my father was, I worked hard to prove myself in the classroom and on the field and it fucking paid off.So, I couldn’t give a fuck if my achievement didn’t measure up to what their golden son had,

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