Chapter One

EMILY

Life is tough.

I don’t know about anyone else but it’s always been tough for me. Be it school, or making friends, I’ve always struggled with it.

I’ve noticed how natural it comes to some other people like my brother, Cale. He’s an example of how to become an extrovert and a nerd. He would party hard, study the day before the exam, and...

Viola!

A fucking ‘A+’

I study all year and I get a C.

Well, that probably goes to show how dumb I am. Kidding. I’d swallow the largest ice-berg in Antarctica before admitting that in front of my brother.

I stand on the weighing machine and look down at it. I was pretty sure I’d lost a few pounds when I tried dieting last time. I reached for my leftover extra cheesy slice of margarita pizza and took a bite of it. I looked into the mirror and that’s when my confidence deflated. My family always told me not to worry, and that I looked great, that being chubby was the new trend blah...blah...and that was bullshit. Literally.

I pulled on a baggy pink sweater over my high-waist blue jeans and ran a brush through my hair. I took some time to apply a bit of blush on my cheeks, then I wore some mascara and a plum red matt lipstick. By the time I was done, my hair was in curls. I liked getting dolled up, I always made sure I would make up in my appearance what I couldn’t with my weight. I think it’s all about the confidence, and makeup gave me that confidence. It’s not that I did a full glam so early in the morning, but since the last couple of weeks, I’d been applying some blush.

It’s because of Seth Monroe.

A small voice in my head whispered.

Shut up! I told that voice.

I couldn’t deny it though. Whenever Seth came into my mind, I’d have these insane butterflies inside my stomach.

Not that he noticed me or anything. We were barely friends.

Okay fine! We hadn’t even said ‘Hi’ and that’s mostly because whenever I tried to talk to Seth or tried to smile or something, he’d quickly look away as if he couldn’t stand to look at me.

I went downstairs into the kitchen and found no one there.

Then I remembered, the cook was admitted to the hospital for the past few days. Ruth, the house-help suddenly fainted and had to be rushed in an ambulance. She’d been more like a mother to me, more so since mine had passed away when I was little. So, I was dead worried, what if this was something serious?

I tried not to think about what would happen to me if something were to happen to Ruth.

I grabbed a granola bar from the pantry, a banana, and a flavored yogurt. I’d be having this for lunch today and that was incase if I didn’t get hungrier, then I’d have to buy lunch too.

I grabbed for the keys of my BMW and walked out of the house.

* * *

There was a drawn picture of a baby elephant on the locker.

I snatched it, scrunched it up into a ball and threw it in the nearest bin. This was routine and I’d learned to start ignoring it. There were bullies everywhere, and High School was the worst. There was this other girl named Anne who’d always find her books in the dumpster. I tried to convince myself that I was in a better position than she was.

I had to get through one year of high school and then HELLO UNIVERSITY.

I bet kids at university were better and mature. I’d move to somewhere in Europe if I had to. My family had mansions in different parts of Europe that we’d used as vacation homes since I was little. Those houses were collecting dust. I could just move into one of them and live alone happily, without having to worry about this boring little town or the crass people living in it.

The class droned on and on and my eyes started to get droopy, and I was almost going to sleep when Seth sauntered into the class. He was wearing a red baseball cap which was covering a huge mass of his dark curls. A white t-shirt was literally flexing his toned body and thick thighs encased in dark jeans.

He was saying something to the teacher, and then his dark eyes met mine, and then he quickly looked away.

“Find a seat Mr. Monroe, and open your book to page two twelve.”

Tina Farlan was seated on the far side of the window behind me and she had an empty seat. He could sit there. I had an empty seat too, but of course, Seth Monroe wouldn’t want to sit with me. I might as well be invisible to him.

His eyes searched for a space and he looked at Tina and then started walking towards our aisle in his easy swagger.

You’d think the guy was a show stopper in New York Fashion Week.

He walked all the way towards me and I thought he would pass my seat but to my utter bafflement, he tossed his backpack in the empty seat next to mine.

My heart jumped into my throat.

Seth Monroe is sitting with me!

Oh my god!

What do I do? Is my hair okay? Is there something green stuck between my teeth? Do I smell nice enough? Why am I not wearing my favorite red top that made me look smoking hot?

Seth’s gigantic body slipped into the seat next to mine, and I was still trying to process this new development in my story.

My crush is sitting next to me.

What do I say to him? Do I smile? Do I talk about the weather? Maybe ask how he was doing? Would he find out that I was having a HUGE crush on him? And I’m talking a crush the size of a Megladon.

I don’t want to sound desperate, you know. Or seem like I’m hitting on him, which I totally want to do.

Guys like Seth, they think they own this world, and he was super-duper ultra-gorgeous, he might have been Michelangelo’s David.

I watched from the corner of my eye as he took off his baseball cap, and ran a hand through his perfect hair. Did he think he was starring in a shampoo commercial? I didn’t see no rolling cameras. Bet he thought he was fit for Hollywood. We might as well be peasants.

I looked at him once and my heart almost leaped out of my chest.

He was staring at me!

I reflexively touched my hair. You know like the Twilight movie where Bella does it. Edward was creepy tho, I mean I crushed on him hard but Seth’s got nothing on Edward.

He was just staring in that unabashed way, and then he quickly looked down into his book. I might have noticed he also rubbed his palm over his jeans.

A dragon tattoo played peek-a-boo from the half-sleeves of his t-shirt.

“How are you allowed you get tattoos? Didn’t your parents say anything?” I blurted out.

He gave me a sideways glance, his sea-green eyes cutting through mine before looking at the front. “They don’t because they don’t care.” His voice could melt butter. Wait, scratch that, it could melt iron. It was smooth, deep, and reached my soul.

“Oh.” I said, “Must be nice.”

“Must be nice that they don’t care about me?” He quipped.

“Um…No…I’m sorry…that’s not what I meant. I mean it must be nice to do whatever you like.”

He chuckled, “Chill, Emily-Mae. I was kidding. I know what you mean.”

There was silence again between us.

He knew my name.

He didn’t bring his Spanish textbook so he asked me if he could share.

So now he was leaning close to me while I tried hard not to inhale his intoxicating perfume or touch him. If I could find the courage to be like Polly who was so confident, she could talk anyone into dating her.

I saw him wiping his palm on his t-shirt again.

“There’s an antiperspirant lotion for the hands. You could use that; it helps a lot for sweaty palms. I know a really good brand.”

His face turned red and he didn’t look my way.

Uh-Oh.

I mentally hit myself.

Why did I have to say stupid things to Seth Monroe of all people?

And then to my utter horror, he climbed to his feet, stuffed his books into his bag-pack, and stormed out of the room without a single glance my way.

I screwed up.