Ch 4: A vow without love

We didn't speak. Not through the arched gallery, not past his family portrait, not even when we passed the old atrium where moonlight flooded the stone at night. I remember laughing there once, as children.

But Darrell never looked back. Never slowed. Not even once.

I wasn't sure if I was supposed to feel like a wife or a prisoner.

Finally, I found my voice.

"Are you going to walk the whole estate without talking? Or is this one of those military morning routines?"

He halted. Just for a second, and I saw his shoulders tense.

Then, slowly, he turned his head.

"I thought you knew what you were getting yourself into," he said. "You want to act like we're married? Fine. Follow me. Learn the place. Memorize the halls. But this.....you pretending we're happily married..."

His voice was filled with venom.

What did I even do to deserve his hatred?

I met his eyes, "What are we, then?"

"Convenience," he said. "A duty to the kingdom . A favor to your father. A leash on my neck."

"You really did change," I muttered.

"So did you. You were five and I was eleven and now look...." He said. "I'm a twenty seven year old man, married to someone who I don't have an ounce of affection for."

My breath caught, but I hid the sting his words caused.

"I'm a prisoner too. Chained with responsibility too heavy to hold," I said trying to keep my voice steady.

Darell scoffed, barely turning to look at me, "What responsibility? You married me for my station, girls like you always go for that."

"You don't know anything about me," I snapped.

"I know enough," he said coldly. "You agreeing to get married to me and all for what? You covering up for your brother years back....and now."

"Then why didn't you reject the marriage?" I asked. "Was it because you too had something to gain from it?"

He looked at me his gaze icy, " Because now I have something to hold over him."

Something inside me cracked. But I promised my mother that I would do my duty. I would happily die for the people I loved and for their peace I offered myself as a sacrifice.

"I may not know war but I know sacrifice," I said. "I know what it means to smile while being bashed and talked about. I know what it's like to be used for peace."

"Then you should understand me better," he murmured voice low and bitter.

We stood in silence again.

"I meant what I said in the vows," I said my voice quiet but unwavering. "I will help you. Stand beside you, as I swore. Not out of love or fantasy , but because I keep my words."

His eyes flickered.

"I won't meddle in your affairs. Whatever burdens you carry, you can keep them. But you will respect me Darell. As your equal. As your wife. In name if nothing else."

He said nothing, but the tension in his stance shifted–less rigid.....more wary.

"I'm not your enemy and so is my family," I added. "So whatever history binds us I wanna erase it.  I don't wish to be a prisoner such past. You also don't have to like me. But you will treat me with dignity this role demands."

Darell looked at me for a long moment before nodding. Did he agree or was he nodding to shut me up?

He turned again to walk but I didn't follow.

I stood my ground, letting his silence stretch between us as a blade.

Then I took a breath, "I'll see the estate on my own, I've burdened you enough."

He paused midstep but didn't turn. His hands clenched briefly at his sides before relaxing again.

"I almost forgot you owed me an apology. But I guess I won't be getting any of that,"  I said.

He still didn't turn.

"I'll not bother you again. I'll be a shadow......"

He turned, slow and sharp. Eyes narrowed.

"Do you ever stop talking?"

A long silence stretched between us again. My eyes were locked in with his.

Then he turned and walked away, without another word.

And I turned too, in the opposite direction –choosing to map the halls  by myself.

Not to prove a point but to reclaim the dignity he wanted to so badly destroy.