No hope

Sophia’s POV. 

After sitting on my parents’ front step for what felt like hours, I finally picked up my suitcases and walked back to my car. 

I had no idea where to go, but I couldn’t stay there any longer. The humiliation of being rejected by my own family was eating me alive. 

I drove aimlessly through the city until I found myself at Riverside Park, the same place where Aiden and I had walked during his recovery. Back then, those walks had felt like progress, like we were building something together. But now the memories just made everything worse. 

I sat on a bench overlooking the river and let myself cry until my chest ached. When the tears finally slowed, I pulled out my phone, with shaking hands, and dialed the only person I had left, my best friend, Beth. 

The phone rang once, twice, three times then straight to voicemail. 

“Hi, you’ve reached Beth, leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”

I tried calling again still no answer. 

“Beth, please,” I whisper into the phone. “I need you. Please call me back.” 

But she didn’t call back. As the afternoon wore on and evening took place. I realized I was truly alone, even Beth, my best friend wasn’t available when I needed her. 

When darkness began to fall over the park, panic took hold.  I had nowhere to go, no home, no family willing to take me in, and no friends either. 

I sat in my car in the empty parking lot, staring at my phone and trying to figure out what to do next. 

That’s when I remembered Aiden had said he’d be gone until the weekend. It was only Wednesday night. Maybe I could go back to the house just for tonight until I figured out my next move. 

The decision felt desperate and empathetic, but I was out of options.

I drove back to the house that had been my home for six months, my heart pounding the entire way, but immediately I pulled into the driveway, my stomach dropped and it felt like my body had run out of the energy I was using to function, my body turned cold, and sweat broke out on my palm. 

The lights were on, every window in the house was glowing with warm light and I could see movement inside. Had Aiden lied to me through his secretary? Probably hoping I’d be gone by the time he’d returned?

The realization hit me like a physical blow. He wanted me out of his house so badly that he made up a business trip to avoid facing me. 

I was supposed to turn back, this was exactly what I needed to know, that he didn’t love me, that all those promises he made to me were indeed a desperate lie, that he had used me. 

But he has to say those with his mouth, I have to hear those from him, maybe then I can finally accept that this was truly over. 

I walked up to the front door and used my key. He hadn’t changed the locks yet. 

The door opened silently, and immediately I stepped inside the house, my body felt like it was jolted with an electric shock. My mouth fell open and I couldn’t find the strength to close it. 

A lady's handbag was sitting on the table in the living room. The bag was open with lipstick and perfume, spilling out like someone had gotten comfortable enough to make themselves at home. 

Something inside my body seems to collapse, the last piece of hope I’d been clinging to, that maybe this was all a misunderstanding that maybe Aiden still cared about me somewhere deep down shattered completely. 

I fell to my knees right there in the entryway the impact jarring, but nothing compared to the pain in my chest, my vision blurred with tears.

I forced myself back to my feet, I had to get out of there before I saw something that would destroy me even more completely. 

I rushed towards the door, my breath coming in short gasps, tears streaming down my face. I couldn’t stay here for another second, so I burst out of the house and ran towards my car, crying so hard.

I could barely see the headlights of an oncoming car that blazed in my vision, and I heard the screeching brakes as the driver swerved to avoid me. 

“Get your fucking damn ass off the road.” The driver yelled but the words barely registered. 

I stumbled to the sidewalk, stood there in the darkness, shaking uncontrollably, I had almost gotten myself killed, for what? To confirm what I already knew… that my husband had moved on before our marriage was even legally over?

Standing there on the street outside the house where I thought I was building a future, I realized I had hit rock bottom. 

I cried until my throat felt sore and my eyes refused to provide more tears, I could feel the hotness of my cheeks. 

Where would I go next? I can't go back to my parent, they clearly didn’t want to see me. 

Aiden had just brought another lady to his house, confirming my worst thought. 

Where would I go next? 

But then, I remembered Janet mentioning something some months ago about a small room above the charity office that could be used for overnight stays during the emergency time, those times I felt like it was completely useless. But now, it felt like a lifeline. 

I drove to the charity home, barely seeing clearly because of the tears that blurred my vision. 

—

The next morning. I woke up disoriented and aching. For a second, I forgot where I was. Then reality crashed back over me. 

I was living in my office building because my husband had kicked me out and my family had rejected me. 

I made my way downstairs to my office trying to make myself look presentable. 

I’d just sat down at my desk when there was a knock at my door. 

“Come in,” I called expecting to see Janet, but instead Beth walked in with her curly dark brown hair bouncing as she moved quickly across the room, her hazel eyes were full of concern and guilt. 

“Sophia, I am so sorry.” She said immediately rushing to give me a hug. “I saw your missed calls this morning and your voicemail. I was at my sister’s house last night and my phone was on silent. I had no idea you were trying to reach me.”

I felt a little bit relieved seeing a friendly face.  “It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re here now.”

She pulled back to look at me and I saw her expression change as she took in my appearance. “You look terrible.  What happened? Your voicemail sounded desperate.”

I told her everything about Aidan‘s cruelty, about the divorce papers, about my family turning me away. Beth listened without interrupting, her expression growing more horrified with every detail. 

“I can’t believe he did this to you,” she said when I finished explaining everything. “You gave up everything for him during his recovery”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. I have nothing.” I cried. 

She went silent for a moment and I could see her struggling with Something and when she finally spoke, her voice was cool. 

“Sophia, I hate what he did to you. It’s cruel and unfair and you didn’t deserve any of it,” she paused, choosing her words carefully, “but maybe…maybe this is for the best.” I stared at her in shock. 

“How can you say that?”

“Because you are losing yourself, when you were with him, especially during his recovery. You stopped being yourself, you stopped pursuing your own dreams, your own goals everything became about taking care of him and making him happy.”

“I love him,” I said. 

“I know you did, but did he love you? Really love you or did he just love having someone to take care of him when he needed it?”

The question hit too close to home. I’ve been asking myself the same thing since this nightmare began. 

“Maybe now you can actually live your life, build your charity the way you always dreamed, make it into something amazing without worrying about whether it will take time away from being the perfect wife.”

“How?” I ask my voice breaking,  “I have nothing, no money, no connections, no support. I’m sleeping in my office because I have nowhere else to go.”