Chapter Five: You Chose Me

POV: Haley

Kai's mouth is on my neck, sucking at the spot just below my ear, and I arch into the mattress because here, there are no consequences. His hands are in my hair, pulling just hard enough to hurt, and the pain is perfect. I am not sick in this dream, my heart pounds from want. Not failure. I am twenty-two and alive and greedy for every second of it.

"Tell me," his voice, hot against my skin.

"Tell you what?"

"That you want this."

"I want this."

He bites my collarbone, and a current runs straight through me. His weight presses me deeper into the bed, and I cannot see the room anymore. There is only his mouth and his hands and the heat of him everywhere.

Then Nathan appears at the edge of the bed. He is not angry. He is just watching. His eyes are steady and terrible.

I push against Kai's chest. "Wait."

Kai laughs, rough and dark, then pulls me in again. "Too late."

"You chose this," he says. "You chose me."

---

I wake up gasping.

The sheets are twisted around my legs, and my skin is damp. I can still feel Kai's mouth on my neck like a ghost branding the flesh.

My phone is buzzing itself on the nightstand. Seven missed calls. Three from Nathan. Four from a number I don't know. Probably the hospital. Probably the cardiologist I ignored yesterday.

Last night comes back in pieces I don't want. Kai in my doorway with my bag. The noodles I made because I didn't know what else to do with him standing in my kitchen. The silence while we ate.

Twenty minutes, maybe less, then he left, and the way he looked at my apartment on his way out wasn't goodbye. More like he was memorizing it.

Nothing happened.

I say it again in my head like it'll mean something the third time.

My phone vibrates.

Nathan: Mom's already setting the table. Hurry.

I'm out of bed before I've finished reading it.

---

By the time I reach the Parks' building, my chest is doing the thing it does on stairs—that slow squeeze—and I push through it because I'm already fifteen minutes late and Mrs. Park doesn't do late.

The apartment smells like soup and lemon polish. Floral tablecloth, matching chairs, a cabinet of porcelain figures nobody is allowed near.

"Haley, dear." Mrs. Park doesn't get up. "You look exhausted."

"Just studying. Finals."

"Of course." She smiles, and it's the same temperature as the soup in front of me. "Nathan tells us you're very dedicated."

Mr. Park sits at the head of the table, his newspaper folded beside his plate. He nods at me when I arrive, and that's his entire contribution to the meal.

Nathan's hand finds my knee under the table. I can't tell if it's reassurance or a warning.

---

She reaches for the remote and turns on the television. "The Remington Foundation gala is today. Kai is opening the new wing. Such an important family."

The screen fills with glittering lights and red carpet, reporters holding microphones like weapons. Then Kai appears in a tuxedo, smiling for the cameras in a way that doesn't reach his eyes.

My spoon stops halfway up.

Zara appears beside him wearing a sleek dress, the color of wine. Her hand rests on his arm, laughing at whatever he just said.

"Now there's a match." Mrs. Park hums into her tea. "The Remingtons and the Vales. Old money understands old money."

Nobody answers her.

"She carries herself so well. That world takes a certain kind of confidence."

I keep my eyes on the bowl.

"The gala next month should be interesting." She sets her cup down. "You should bring Haley, Nathan. It would be good for her to see how these things work."

Nathan looks up. "Mom."

"What?" Her smile doesn't move. "It would be a good experience."

A good experience. The kind you have once, from the outside, pressed against the glass.

On the screen, Kai is looking at Zara with the exact intensity he once aimed at me in a bathroom doorway. I hate myself for caring.

Nathan isn't watching the television. I can feel him watching me, and I don't turn to meet his eyes. If I do, he'll see everything.

---

After breakfast, Nathan and I stand on the balcony. The air is cold on my face.

"I've been waiting all morning for you to tell me," Nathan says.

My stomach drops. "Tell you what?"

"That Kai stopped by your building last night."

The silence stretches between us. Somewhere below a siren wails, and neither of us looks toward it.

"How did you—" I stop.

"After dropping you off, I parked at the end of your street. Waiting for your lights to go out." His voice is flat, and it scares me more than yelling would. "Then I saw his SUV come from the other direction. He walked up with your bag. And I sat there thinking, okay, she'll mention it tomorrow. I gave you the whole morning, Haley. The whole morning."

"Nothing happened." It is the same lie I told myself this morning. It sounds weaker out loud.

"I know nothing happened." He turns to face me, and he looks like he didn't sleep at all. "And that's not the point. You sat across from me all morning and you said nothing."

"I didn't want you to worry—"

"Bullshit."

He's never sworn at me. Not once, in two years.

"You didn't tell me because you knew exactly how it would sound. You knew what I'd think. And you let me think it anyway."

I open my mouth to explain. The noodles. The silence. The way Kai looked at me like I was already his. The dream. God, the dream. But explaining any of it means admitting all of it.

"Nathan, I—" My voice breaks. Not from emotion. From pain.

It starts in my chest. Not the familiar tightness—something worse. A pressure like a hand closing around my heart, squeezing.

I reach for the balcony railing, but my palm scrapes concrete instead, missing it completely.

"Haley?" Nathan's face changes. The anger vanishes and replaces with something raw and terrified.

I try to say his name, but my tongue is too heavy. The city lights blur into streaks of gold and red, and I hear him shout before I understand I'm already falling. His arms catch me, but I cannot feel them. Something inside me is slipping away. The last thing I see is his face above mine, screaming something I can't hear.

Before everything goes dark, one thought follows me down.

You chose me.

---

Nathan runs every red light, one hand on the wheel while the other is on my wrist, searching for a pulse.

"Stay with me. Haley, stay with me. I'm sorry, okay? Please. I'm sorry for what I said. Just stay with me."

Behind us, his mother's voice cuts through the car from the phone wedged on the dashboard.

"We're right behind you, Nathan. We're right behind you—"

He doesn't answer her.

"Not yet," he whispers. "Not yet. We're almost there."

---

He carries me through the ER doors, screaming for help. A nurse tries to take me from him, but he doesn't let go. His arms are locked around me like he can hold me to earth by force of will.

"Sir, you need to—"

"Help her!" The sound barely sounds human. Other patients turn, and a security guard steps forward immediately.

They pull me from his arms, and his father's hand closes on his shoulders, holding him back.

They wheel me through double doors.

Nathan tries to follow, but a doctor blocks him. "Only family is allowed past this point."

"Please. She's all I have."

The doctor's face softens, but it does not yield. "We will update you as soon as we can."

---

Nathan paces. His mother tries to touch his arm, and he shakes her off. His father sits with both hands clasped, staring at the floor.

Ten minutes pass. Then twenty. The clock on the wall ticks loud enough to drive Nathan insane.

A nurse rushes past, pushing equipment. Another follows. Nobody looks at him. Nobody stops.

Then the doors swing open, and a doctor hurries through, talking fast to someone behind him.

"...cardiology..."

"...not responding..."

"...again..."

He leaves through another set of doors before Nathan's legs decide to move on their own.

Nathan stands at the window, staring inside.

Nurses and doctors moving too fast. Machines. Blue gloves. A bed, and on it, me.

A doctor steps in front of me and blocks Nathan's view. A second later a nurse notices him and pulls the blinds shut.

There's only his own reflection looking back at him now, breathing hard against the glass.

Then, beyond the door, a voice sharp and certain.

"We're losing her."

---