CHAPTER 20

NELLY

Kitten.

I didn't understand the meaning of that word until I was old enough to understand that the tightness in my chest wasn't a physical illness, but an anxiety attack. I had to talk to a psychologist to understand that there were traumas embedded in me, I read books seeking self"knowledge and acceptance, I tried to deal with these traumas head on and I almost underwent cosmetic surgery to get into the standards, almost… I release the air that was trapped in my lungs and rest my forehead on the mirrored glass of the bathroom. There are many "almosts" in my life and few certainties.

I turn on the simple faucet in the bathroom and wash my face, mixing the water with my tears until I can no longer define which drops came from my eyes. I arrange my hair in a bun on top of my head, pull up the sleeves of the light blue dress shirt I'm wearing to my elbows and remove any dirt from the knees of the pants I'm wearing, open my toiletry bag and remove the paste with the hairbrush. ins