Semua Bab A Queen Among Tempests: Bab 81 - Bab 90

“Thousands of years of protecting the people of this Earth, but I couldn’t even protect myself,” I sigh despondently. “Some guardian I am,” I snort.Aya furiously shakes his head, squeezing my hand as his arm around my shoulders holds me tighter. “Orenda, you survived. So many people would have given up and taken the easy way out, but you didn’t. You stayed strong and survived, and because of that, you’re here right now. I’m so proud of you for not giving up,” he commends, kissing my temple tenderly.I take an uneasy breath and I rub soothing circles against my belly. He’s praising me for not giving up when the truth is I did. It feels like he’s applauding a fraud.“You don’t agree,” Azadou’s deep voice – like rumbling thunder – observes, making my head shoot up.I still can’t comprehend that Azadou helped to save me or that he’s still here. It’s been two days since they brought me home, and he still hasn’t left. Even more shocking is that Aya hasn’t attempted to kick him out once, h

His confession has my mind spinning and my stomach twisted in knots. Even without a bond between us, my essram still aches painfully to hear him confirm what I suspected. To hear him confess that he wanted to hurt me…“Zarseti finally explained it, and maybe it was because I was so broken, but I was finally able to take in what she had to say…which only made the suffering worse,” he admits glumly, his eyes filled with regret, pain and sorrow. “I spent every minute of every day reliving everything I had done to you and hating myself more with each recollection. You showed me nothing but kindness time and time again, and I repaid you with derision and maltreatment. The day we first met, you took a stand against the Gods and your own maker for me,” he recalls with awe. “Despite everything, you stood there defending and shielding me…no one had ever done that for me before,” he utters desolately.My heart clenches to see him so vulnerable, sitting next to me, stripping himself bare for the

Entering the living room, I see Ayawamat sitting on the sofa, staring intently at his laptop screen, his face morphing from disapproval to adoration and back like the flipping of a switch.I walk over to him. “What are you looking at?” I ask curiously.He looks up, his expression turning unusually bashful. “I…um…”I sit down and clasp my hands on top of my belly. “Well, it’s not porn. You wouldn’t look so shy if it were,” I tease.He chortles, the sound lifting my spirits and putting a bit more life back into his eyes.“It’s not porn. I…was looking at baby things,” he reveals, turning the laptop so that I can see.My eyebrows almost disappear into my hairline as I take in the webpage displaying rows and rows of adorable baby clothes. I’d been so focused on whether or not the baby and I would live to see tomorrow that I hadn’t given any thought to baby necessities.“This is so thoughtful of you,” I gush, reaching out and squeezing his hand.He shrugs half-heartedly. “The least I can do

I grab a hair clip from the bathroom sink and push down the wave of anxiety rising inside me. With shaky hands, I put my hair up in a bun, taking slow breaths as I remind myself over and over in my head that just because I can’t feel my hair on my neck, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. I repeat the mantra as I strip down and climb into the tub, the wonderfully hot water easing the tension from my muscles as I breathe in the scent of the bubbles, letting them calm me down as they surround me with their frothy warmth.I look up to see Azadou standing by the tub, his face a little flustered as he looks down at me. “What does pampering involve, exactly?” he asks with uncertainty.“Well, in this case, you can wash my back for me since I can’t reach, and then my feet because I can’t reach them either,” I say with a cheeky smile, letting the anxiety drift to the back of my mind.I grab my loofah off the edge of the tub and hold it up for him. He takes it from me, eyeing it curiously, then sits o

“You’re a father?” I quietly ask.He studies me carefully, rising to his feet. “Yes.”“What’s her name?”“Aživa,” he answers suspiciously.“She’s beautiful,” I say sincerely.He blinks rapidly, his mouth agape only briefly before he composes himself. “Thank you…Forgive me, I’m just not used to you giving compliments.”“I’m not used to giving them,” I admit, awkwardly. “Do you know what kind of God she is yet?”Gently, he shakes his head. “She’ll tell us when she’s able to speak. She’ll know what she is, just like we all did. Even you,” he answers, giving me a knowing look.I nod in understanding. It’s not something easy to explain, but the moment I came into being, the first thing I could comprehend was what I was, not just a God, but the God of Malice. I wonder what kind of Demi-Goddess his daughter will be. I wonder even more what kind of Demi-God or Goddess my child will be.“Why are you here, Azadou?” Oshmin asks with burning curiosity.“I desperately need a favour from you,” I br