Semua Bab Wine Stained Lips: Bab 31 - Bab 34

Calla's POVIt's been days since I watched my mother get put into the earth. I drowned in my grief, depriving myself any form of vitamin D from the sun, laying in my room merging into my furniture, especially my mattress. I took care of my mum,I held back her hair when she puked from her first chemo,I wrapped her in blankets when she was cold,I pretended not to hear her cry in the middle of the night because she was scared,so I'd act like I didn't see her. Instead, I brought her fruits and we'd talk before she falls asleep and when she does,I'd kiss her forehead and pray to God to keep her.The scene of her body in the coffin was stuck my mind, hunting me. It was a real life nightmare I had fallen into and couldn't wake from. When they put her into the ground,I broke in ways I've never been broken before. Parts of me intertwined with her was buried that day and I'd never recover. 'That's the thing about pain,it demands to be felt' it was a quote from John Green's The fault in our s

Calla's POVMy foot sank into the soil as I approached my mother's tombstone. My body felt heavy with every step I took as I reluctantly got closer. The hair on my arms raised like I had been electrified as I stood there frozen letting the cold breeze brush my skin.'In loving memory of Hannah Rhode Grayson,September 7th 1969 - June 28th 2022' was craved on it. My thoughts could not fathom how gutwreacking I felt reading it. The cement of my mother's tombstone was still novel and on it were a bunch of fresh flowers piled on top of dried one. I thought of how many somber eyes had stood in this same spot as I did mourning the loss of my mother. I wanted her for just myself,but she was more than just my mum. She was so much more to so many people than I'd ever know and they were hurting just as badly as I am.I wiped the tears that escaped my eyes and I stood there staring at the concert and the titles the flowers,the grass, everything and anything because I still couldn't accept that