All Chapters of I Never Hated You : Chapter 131 - Chapter 140

287 Chapters

Chapter Ten

Lucas kept his arm where it was, covering his face. “Have fun,” he said, his voice a little muffled, and Sean’s hand lifted away.“Yeah, okay,” Sean said. “Sleep tight. Make sure you take your dentures out before you doze off.”“Go away.”Sean didn’t go, not right away. But finally he stood with a sigh, bent to slap a gentle goodbye to Lucas’s stomach, and left the bedroom.It was all the same. Nothing had changed at all. Lucas had been gone for three years, and he’d come back to the same patterns, the same attitudes, and the same confusion. It was like a damp blanket, one that didn’t give Lucas the warmth he needed but that was still better than facing the night with nothing to protect him.Or maybe it wasn’t better. He swung impatiently to his feet and looked around the bedroom, not that much bigger than his prison cell. The last few sessions with his counselor in jail, once it had become clear that he was going to be released, had been all about this. Lucas was going back to the li

Chapter Eleven

The dazzling morning sunlight did nothing to brighten Mark’s mood. He’d seen too much the night before. At first he’d been confused, there in his darkened car, when he’d seen the friend heading off to the bar without Cain. Mark had been planning to follow them and find more incriminating evidence, but what was he supposed to do if Cain stayed inside? Then theblonde had shown up, making it crystal clear what Cain had been waiting for. Mark was still replaying it in his mind: the way the woman had leaned into Cain, her hands twining through his scruffy hair, her body practically writhing against his, promising even more pleasure once they were behind closed doors.Jimmy had liked blondes. He’d liked them a lot, too much to ever settle down with just one. He’d made their mom antsy, waiting for grandkids from the only son likely to provide them. Mark felt guilty now, not only for his own reproductive probabilities but for the secret relief he’d always feltabout Jimmy not rushing into an

Chapter Twelve

“It’s Friday night, Lukey!” Sean draped an arm over Luke’s shoulders and smiled happily. He’d already been half-drunk when Luke had arrived home from work to find the guys sitting around the Gage living room, the air dingy with cigarette and pot smoke. They’d been waiting for him.Lucas tried to remember how he talked to these guys. “Does Friday even matter, when you’re not working?”“Yeah, it does,” Tinker said firmly. “Because the ladies work, so it matters to them. They’re gonna be out in fine style tonight, all dressed up, looking to hook up.”“Unless you’re going to be a one-woman man, now?” There was something sharp in Sean’s smile, something Luke didn’t want to even try to figure out. “You and Mandi Carter—that went well? Are you guys a thing, now?”“I like her,” Lucas said honestly. “But it’s not a thing.”“Good!” Scotty had started drinking rye at some point while Lucas was away, and it made him seem older, sitting over there sipping on his glass of amber poison. Made him see

Chapter Thirteen

When he made it out of the bar, he walked even faster and refused to turn around. He’d driven down with Sean but had been prepared to take a cab home. Now, he knew he wouldn’t be able to sit still for even a short car ride. Instead, he broke into a jog. He was running away. He was a coward and a disgrace. And there would be consequences.Lucas was dozing on the couch when the front door crashed open. He stood automatically, wondering if the cops had come to find him, then didn’t relax at all when Sean and the boys staggered into the room.They saw him and stared. No words, just aggression. And Lucas had nothing to say, either. It was Sean who finally broke the silence. “What the fuck, Lucas?”Sean was bleeding from a slice across his temple and the other side of his face was swelling across his cheekbone and up around his eye. He had a split lip and bloody knuckles. And he was probably in the best shape of any of them.“I couldn’t—” Lucas started, but Sean cut him off.“If you say one

Chapter Fourteen

“Father Mark!”Mark looked up to see Darren Samms’s ruddy, smiling face peering into the kitchen of the halfway house. It was impossible not to smile back and Mark set down his list of inventory items in preparation for the inevitable next step.Darren was a big man, tall as well as wide, and his hugs were full-body affairs. He was new to the area but not shy about making new friends, all of whom were greeted physically. Mark was getting used to it but he always wondered how the parole officer’s clients felt about the invasion of their space. Luckily, Darren was making a name for himself with an expert blend of firmness and compassion, so there hadn’t been too many complaints about his eccentricities, as far as Mark knew. “Good to see you, Darren. What brings you here?”“Where’s your phone, Father? I tried to call and let you know I was coming, but there was no answer.”“Oh.” Mark had turned the ringer off that morning, preferring to avoid calls from his parents, his rector, and every

Chapter Fifteen

“Having a job is a term of your parole,” Darren said, filling the silence after Mark had failed to answer Cain’s question. “If you’ve lost the current job, you’ll need to find another. If you can’t find another, we’ll look at getting you into a training program, or finding somewhere for you tovolunteer full time. If you’re training or volunteering, we’ll look after room and board and give you a small amount for other expenses.” Darren glanced over to see if Mark was going to contribute anything, then added, “But you got some training inside, right?”Cain slowly nodded. He seemed nearly catatonic, as if the words were taking longer than they should to reach his brain. “Plumbing. Electrical. I started on carpentry. But I couldn’t do a full apprenticeship in there. I don’t have my ticket in any of it.” There was nothing wrong with the words themselves, but the total lack of affect was definitely something strange.Darren ignored that, saying, “Still, you’ve got the makings of a damned f

Chapter Sixteen

By Sunday afternoon it was clear that life at the halfway house was going to be easy. All the same strategies that had served Lucas in prison worked just as well in this new environment. He did what he was told, kept his head down, and used his intimidating stare if anyone tried to mess with him. The rest of the residents were in the same boat as he was, so they understoodabout walking on eggshells to be sure his parole wasn’t violated. A couple of them even seemed like they might understand the other reasons for Lucas’s careful behavior, but he didn’t test that possibility by actually speaking to them about it. The tiny, cautious hope that there was someone who was dealing with regrets similar to his was a gift too valuable, and too fragile, to be carelessly risked. He’d rather cling to his unverified belief than try to confirm it and have it destroyed instead.So he stayed away from the other residents except for mealtimes or communal chores, and he absolutely avoided the priest wh

Chapter Seventeen

The man talked to squirrels. The man made promises to squirrels. And from what Mark had seen, he kept the promises too. There were several pine cones covered in peanut butter set out in the backyard when Mark arrived at the house on Monday morning, and they definitely hadn’t been there the day before.It was impossible to reconcile these gentle, if eccentric, actions with the cold-blooded killer Mark had been imagining. But no, not imagining. The man was a killer. He’d confessed to the crime. There’d been no real trial, just a hearing to confirm the plea bargain that had diminished the charges from second-degree murder to manslaughter. Some testimony from witnesses to aid in the sentencing. Cain had never once denied the act itself. Never denied the act. Of course, that was another thing that could be interpreted in a different way than Mark had been seeing it all along. Rather than being a sign of cold-blooded bravado, maybe his honesty was his form of accepting responsibility.Mark

Chapter Eighteen

Lucas had spent the morning at the job center, replying to every Help Wanted ad for which he seemed even remotely qualified and then working on his resume. It was appallingly short, of course, and there was no way to explain his three year absence from the workforce without mentioning the thing that was going to instantly disqualify him from almost every job intown, but he did what he could.That was what life was, after all. Lucas had to keep trying because the alternative, while certainly attractive to most of his mind, was still unacceptable to that damn lizard brain that wanted him to survive. And whatever scrap of pride he had left wouldn’t allow him to become totally catatonic. So, lizard plus pride equaled effort, as pathetic as he knew his chances were.He spent the afternoon going door-to-door from one business to another. He skipped anything retail, any places where the only jobs would involve customer service. And he skipped places that served alcohol, at least for the fir

Chapter Nineteen

Mark was washing up after one of his rare dinners at home when his cell phone rang. He answered it and heard a lightly accented male voice.“Mark Webber? This is Karl Aachen, from the Emergency Room at the Health Care Center. I’m trying to track down a contact person for a recent admission, and he had a business card from your Community Living facility in his wallet. This number was given as the after-hours emergency contact.”It wasn’t an unheard of call, but Mark’s stomach tightened anyway. “Yes, that’s right. Who’s the patient? Is he okay?”“His name is Lucas Cain. He’s being assessed right now. From what I know I’d say his condition is serious but probably not life-threatening.”Lucas Cain. Of course. “What happened to him?”“A fight, it looks like. The police are involved, and they’re sorting out the details.”A fight. Cain had been out of jail for less than a week and he was already back to his old habits. He hadn’t learned a thing from Jimmy’s death. “I see. Yes, he’s a residen

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