The Luna He Didn’t Choose のすべてのチャプター: チャプター 31 - チャプター 40

Ethan’s POV“I know that too.”The words left my mouth, but they sounded empty even to me.Like they didn’t belong in the air between us.Like they weren’t enough to hold the weight of everything that had already broken.Because what was I supposed to say after that?What kind of apology could fix losing a child?What sentence could undo the way I failed her when she needed me most?There wasn’t one.There was nothing.The silence on the other side of the bathroom door stretched so long it started to feel alive, like it was breathing with us.I could still hear Bella inside.Not speaking.Just breathing.Fast.Uneven.Like every breath was something she had to fight for.And somehow that was worse than if she had been screaming at me.At least then I would’ve known she still had energy left to feel something toward me.I rested my forehead against the wall beside the door.Not pushing.Not knocking.Just standing there like I deserved to feel stuck.Because maybe I did.Because she de

Ethan’s POVThe drive home was quiet in a way that felt almost wrong, like the world had turned its volume down just so I could sit alone with my thoughts, and every single one of them still somehow led back to Bella.The city lights blurred past the window in long streaks of gold and white, but I barely registered any of it because my mind kept replaying her face over and over again like a broken film I couldn’t shut off, especially the way her eyes had looked at me when she finally told me to leave.Not angry.Not loud.Just completely exhausted, like she had nothing left in her to give me, not even hatred.My hands tightened on the steering wheel without me realizing it, my knuckles going pale as I forced myself to keep driving even though every part of me felt like I should turn the car around and go back, even though I knew she would only look at me the same way again.Please leave.The words kept echoing in my head, soft but final, like they had been carved into me instead of sp

Ethan’s POVI did not sleep.Not really.I spent most of the night sitting in the nursery with Bella’s old note in my hands while memories I had spent months trying to outrun caught up to me one by one.By the time morning arrived, I felt exhausted.The kind of exhausted that had nothing to do with sleep.The kind that settled deep inside your chest and refused to leave.Sunlight streamed through the windows as I walked downstairs, but it did nothing to make the house feel warmer.If anything, the daylight made everything worse.At night, I could pretend the empty rooms were just shadows.In daylight, there was nowhere to hide from the truth.Bella was gone.And this house knew it.I walked into the kitchen and automatically reached for two mugs before freezing halfway through the motion.My chest tightened.For a second, I simply stood there staring at them.One mug in each hand.One for me.One for her.A habit.A stupid habit that refused to die.Slowly, I placed the second mug bac

Ethan’s POVA week passed.Seven long days.Seven painfully quiet days.And somehow every single day felt longer than the one before it.I kept my promise.No calls.No texts.No surprise visits.No showing up outside her apartment.Nothing.I gave Bella exactly what she asked for.Space.The problem was that space felt a lot like torture.I was sitting in my office staring at paperwork that I hadn’t actually read in nearly twenty minutes when Derek finally snapped.“Ethan.”I blinked.“What?”“You’ve been staring at the same page for half an hour.”I looked down.Sure enough, the document sitting in front of me hadn’t moved.I sighed.“Maybe it’s a really interesting page.”Derek looked completely unimpressed.“Maybe you’re a terrible liar.”Fair.I leaned back in my chair and rubbed my eyes.Sleep still wasn’t coming easily.Neither was peace.Most nights ended the same way.I would lie awake.Think about Bella.Think about our child.Think about everything I should have done differ

Bella’s POVThe problem with seeing Ethan again was that it made remembering him impossible to avoid.For months, I had worked so hard to build a life that did not revolve around him anymore. I had forced myself to stop checking my phone every five minutes. I had forced myself to stop looking for him in crowded places. I had forced myself to stop wondering what he was doing or whether he missed me.It had not been easy.Some days had been horrible.Some nights had been even worse.But eventually the memories had stopped feeling sharp enough to cut me open every time they appeared.Then Ethan showed up again.And suddenly it felt like I was back at the beginning.I was standing in my apartment kitchen the next morning, staring at a piece of toast that had already gone cold, when my phone buzzed beside me.I glanced down and saw Maya’s name.Maya: You looked emotional yesterday.I immediately rolled my eyes.Maya: That’s suspicious.Maya: Very suspicious.Maya: Suspiciously suspicious.