Chapter 6

“And you didn’t bother to tell anyone about it?!” Calvin’s eyes were with disbelief and shock, even his voice trembled a bit.

“Derek said—”

“Of course, it is that asshole once again.” Calvin cursed loudly. “What the hell were you thinking not telling anyone about it? When I came to the hospital that day, they said that you couldn’t see anyone yet, and the next time when I was there I heard that you were already discharged, only to come home and find out that Derek had taken you home.”

“But—”

“He must have told you that both of you were lovers, no wonder you were behaving weird and not your usual behavior, you still continued to cling unto him when you weren’t supposed to want him anywhere near you after everything he did.”

“But I love him!” Nirvana insisted. “It didn’t matter that I lost my memory, I know in my heart that he is someone that I love deeply, and my brain didn’t remember most things but my body definitely did. Some memories of when we were dating have even been recovered. There is no way you can tell me that’s not right.”

Calvin held Nirvana’s hand and looked at her sympathetically.

“You love him, you are right about that. Your loyalty also runs as deep as your love runs, there’s no doubt about that. But does he love you the same way? You only remembered yourself loving him, do you remember him ever loving you?”

“He loved me too!” Nirvana argued fiercely, the need to defend Derek clouding her mind, after what he just did, he wasn’t supposed to do this but it wasn’t something that she could stop in just a day. It was instinct, it was normality, something that she was used to doing every time.

“Are these his feelings or your feelings that you want him to feel?” Calvin asked and Nirvana didn’t have a reply for him. 

“It is about time you admit that he doesn’t love you. Never did all these five years you were enduring the tortures for him, never did all those three years you used to date and would never do in the future.

If he had love three years ago, there was no way he would have broken up with you coldly and left you alone at a restaurant where Kaitlyn was waiting for him outside, and go ahead and get married to Kaitlyn the very next day.”

“What are we talking about? Grandfather forced him to get married to Kaitlyn,”

“Grandfather forced him my ass! He did that out of his own volition. You had an accident on the day of their wedding and I can bet everything I own on the fact that he definitely didn’t come to see you the day or the next day of the accident.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because I was there on both days and there wasn’t any record of anyone visiting you except me.”

Nirvana suddenly stood up, shaking her head in disbelief. 

She refused to believe that all these years she had been deceived, that she was only dancing to the tune that he had been playing. That she had been manipulated all these years.

“I…I must leave, I…I have to see Derek,” Nirvana murmured to herself before charging out of the play room, she got to the living room and took the key that was on the table. She was disoriented, confused and afraid.

Afraid that everything might be true.

One glance in the direction of both Kaitlyn’s and Derek’s room was all she needed to know that they were in,, the only other place he would go so late at night would be the bar that both him and Kaitlyn used to go on the weekend, she was sure that Kaitlyn must definitely be there but she didn’t cared—it would be even for the better if she could ask the both of them at the same time.

“You can’t do this, Nirvana, it is dangerous!” She could hear Calvin hurrying after but she was faster. By the time he was out of the front door she was already inside the car.

“You can’t drive the car, you have no license, you might find yourself in a worse situation if you were asked to pull over!” Calvin’s warning fell on deaf ears as she ignited the car and drove out of the mansion.

She didn’t want to hear more from Calvin, it would only continue to sound more and more like a lie because of how unbelievable it was to her. She had to ask Derek herself.

That was the only solution.

As she continued driving, her vision kept blurring because of the tears pooling in her eyes but she didn’t took a moment to wipe away the mascara filled tears that dropped on her hands, she only increased the speed, her mind only focused on where she was going as her heart thump loudly in her ears.

Suddenly there was a truck coming ahead of her, the road was a one-way road so there was not supposed to be any car coming in her direction, but yet there was this one who seemed to be coming straight for her.

Nirvana tried to swerve the car away from the direction of the truck but her brake failed and she could only stare with wide eyes as she counted down the minute to the time of her own death. There was no way she was going to survive this, she was speeding towards it as with the person in the truck.

At that very moment, she felt her head start buzzing loudly, pain shot through her head and her hands instinctively left the steering and clutched her head as she swayed in her seat, more tears falling from her eyes because of the extreme pain.

Her memories waltzed in front of her.

Flashes of events started sliding across in her brain, events which were definitely a part of her.

Calvin was right.

Derek broke up with her coldly at the restaurant where they had their first date and usually went every time.

It was Christmas when he dumped her, the restaurant and the city was shining brightly and sparkling with warm decorations, he had flat out informed him that Kaitlyn was the person that he needed and the one for him.

Without waiting for her reply, he went out to hug Kaitlyn who was waiting for him to finish what he was up to, both of them looked like long lost lovers who just got reunited under the mistletoe while she just sat there and stared blankly as hot tears fell from her eyes.

She was waiting for him to turn back , so stuck and grounded in the illusions where she wanted him to tell her that he was joking and he didn’t just throw their love of three years for a woman he just knew.

She had sat there for heavens knew how long before finally got herself home—she got the shock of her life when her family threw her out too, courtesy of Kaitlyn’s request.

Nirvana might have loved Derek but she was definitely not a pushover, there was no way she was going to let both of them do something like that to her and stay still. She was going to announce to the whole world at their wedding that she was the one dating Derek until that day—their wedding day.

So she set off, devastated, hopeless, heartbroken and most of all, livid. She wouldn’t sit still and allow it, that wasn’t her, that wasn’t Nirvana Ryan.

She was on the road, just like right now, but the difference was that it was afternoon then and the day was still clear.

But similar events happened and there was a truck in her direction that rammed into her car.

Both this time and then, the car tumbled over and flipped upside down before landing in the normal position again, her head hit the car hard and blood stained her hair. 

She felt the life start to seep away from her slowly.