Chapter 4

Gwen’s pov

I said the words. They felt like I was taking a big step into the unknown. So I said them again to make sure I really meant it.

"I will marry you, Xavier."

He just stood there in the hospital corridor, his hand on the small of my back. Around us the hospital was noisy. Wheels rolling on the floor, a monitor machine beeping in the distance and a nurse talking to someone around the corner.

"You are sure " he asked me like he was giving me a chance to change my mind if I wanted to.

"I am doing this for Josie." I said before he could think this was something it was not.

"I need someone who can keep her safe. Someone who is important and strong enough to keep Cole away from her. Now that someone is you. So yes I am sure."

For a moment his face changed, just a split second it looked like he broke character. I did not know what it meant but then as quickly as it came it was gone, back to normal.

"Alright " he nodded.

He took his hand away from my back and for some reason I noticed it was not there anymore which bothered me.

"You need to understand this." He turned to face me.

The way he looked at me was different. Softer, but also more serious, like a man who meant exactly what he was saying.

"The moment you leave this hospital with me your old life is over. Not paused. Not waiting for you, Finished. Do you understand that? There's no halfway."

"I know what a Luna is."

"Do you?"

"I know what I am agreeing to."

He looked at me for another moment. Then he said:

"Isn't there anything that is stopping you, nothing you'd want to go back to?"

I thought about the apartment with the blocked accounts, the office desk I'd sat at for thirteen hours, the pavement outside the Salem house and Cole's hand flat against my chest. There was nothing to miss, it was all shit.

"No," I said.

"There's nothing."

“Alright then. Give me a moment.” He said and left to make calls.

I saw Xavier Holt walk down the corridor before turning the corner. I stood there by myself for a moment, thinking.

I had just said yes to marrying Xavier Holt.

The thought scattered my mind like how a rock thrown in a calm pool would send ripples in all directions.

I had agreed to marry the Alpha of the Hollow Pack. The man Cole had been at war with since before I even knew either of their names.

The man the old records would say was my fated mate, the word written in my bones long before anyone had asked my opinion about it.

I put my hand on the wall for a moment just to feel something solid before I walked in to see my daughter.

The light in Josie's room was not very bright but it felt warm.

She was awake, lying on her back with her stuffed bear on her stomach and staring at the ceiling. She turned to look at me with her eyes that seemed too old for a little girl.

I went over to her and picked her up before she could say anything.

"Mama." She said, letting me hold her for a while before she pushed back to look at me.

"Why are you holding me so tight?"

"Because you are mine. baby girl." I pushed her hair behind her ear.

"How are you feeling now?"

Josie thought about this for a moment in a serious way like she does with most things."Tired. And my chest feels like when you press your thumb on a bruise." She looked down at the IV line taped to her arm.

"And I also don't like this bit."

"I know."

She was quiet for a moment before she looked at me and said, in a careful voice.

"I don't want to go back to Daddy's house."

This was the same voice she used when she was getting ready to say something hard.

I kept my face still.

"Okay."

"He put me in a room and locked the door." She told me this in the simple way kids talk when they report things.

"It was dark in that room and I begged him to open the door but he did not do it."

She said looking down at the bear she was holding in her lap.

"I don't like him anymore."

When I heard her say that I felt very angry inside. I knew I had to calm down and not feel that way right now because I had to be strong for Josie's sake.

"You are not going back to him. ever." I said, holding back my tears.

"I promise you that. You are never going back to that house."

Josie looked at me for a long time trying to figure out if what I said was true. She wanted to make sure it was something she could trust. Then I saw something change in her face before she leaned back against the pillow. She held the bear tight, against her chest.

"Okay " she said.

I stayed with Josie until her eyes got tired, her breathing slower and the bear fell over to the side.

She's worth anything, I thought.

Every single thing I am signing over. Every consequence I am not ready for. All of it.

Xavier turned when he heard me come out and walked toward me.

"It's handled," he said.

"A car will come for you both when the doctor clears her. You'll come to the main estate. There's a wing, separate and private. You'll have your own space."

I nodded.

"Josie's training will start as soon as she's well enough. I've already contacted my head trainer." He paused.

"She'll be safe."

"I know." And I did know.

He was quiet for a moment. Then he said:

"The Annual Moon Festival is in seven days."

I looked at him.

"It's the largest gathering of the Hollow Pack. Every elder, every ranking member, every allied Alpha." He looked at me. Did not blink.

"I will announce you at the festival."

At that moment, the corridor shrinked.

"As your Luna," I said.

"Yes, as my Luna."

Seven days. Seven days from now I would stand in front of an entire pack as Xavier Holt's claimed mate, his intended mate, his Luna and Cole Mercer would hear about it the way he heard about everything that will be taken from him, through someone else's mouth, always after it was already done and irrevocable.

"Fine, " I said.

Xavier looked at me for one second trying to find the part where I might be unsure but he did not see it. He nodded a little.

"Get some rest " He said as he walked towards the elevator.

"Xavier."

He looked back.

I did not know what I wanted to say but I just needed him to see that I was still standing upright, still steady, still the person who had made the decision rather than the person the decision had happened to.

"Seven days," I said to him.

Something crossed his face that I did not fully catch before he turned away and the elevator doors closed.

I stood at the window. I looked at the city and felt the weight of what was coming to settle across my shoulders.

It felt like a cloak that I had not worn before but it still somehow fit, like it had always been made for me.

In seven days I would become Luna of the Hollow Pack.

Somewhere, across this city Cole Mercer was asleep and smiling convinced that he had won.

He had no idea what he had just set in motion.