Almost Worth It

Audrey

“That sounds like fun,” Mom said. “I bet you really would love it, Audrey. Maybe you’d run into some of your old friends. You could probably show them a move or two.” She winked at me, and I had to fight not to roll my eyes.

Show them a move or two? Did she think I was going to bust out a few of my ballet moves right there in the middle of some small-town bar? It just showed how much she really thought of me and my career.

“I’m not in contact with any of my old friends,” I said, hoping that would be the end of the matter. The last thing I wanted to do was go to a bar by myself. I didn’t want to be that desperate stranger standing off to the side, trying to attach myself to a group.

I felt another pang of homesickness for my life in Paris. I hadn’t gone out alone in all the time that I’d been there. The other dancers at the Global Traveling Dance Academy of Performing Arts, the ones who had been there for a while, had immediately taken me under their wings when I had arrived, showing me the town. And now that I was one of the people who had been there for years, I had shown other newcomers around too.

I missed my friends. I wanted to call them, but I knew they were all busy. And the last thing I wanted was to talk to them about dance right now. Not when it could be six months before I was back dancing with them all again.

Mom looked disappointed, though. “I just thought that if you were going to be here for a little while, it might be nice for you to try to connect with some of your old crowd. But I guess you’re not planning on being here for a while. When do you have to get back to work?”

I stared down at my fork. There was nothing to be gained from lying to her. I took a deep breath. “I’m not sure,” I finally admitted. “I rolled my ankle, and I need to take some time off to let it heal. And then I’ll need to train until I’m ready to go back to dancing like I was. It could be a couple of months.”

I didn’t want to admit to the six months because I didn’t want her getting her hopes up that I would be staying here the entire time. Even if I couldn’t go back to the academy sooner than six months from now, I’d be damned if I was going to stay here in Aberdeen for all of that time. 

“Oh, honey,” Mom said. “Why didn’t you say so?” She sounded sympathetic, and I looked away so that I wouldn’t start crying. I had never wanted to go home so badly in my life. And North Carolina wasn’t home, not anymore.

“I’ll call Dr. Travis and see if we can get you in for an appointment,” she said.

“I’ve already seen a doctor,” I said.

“Well, it wouldn’t hurt for you to see another one here,” Mom said, shaking her head. “I’ll pay for it. You don’t have to worry.”

It was just like I was a kid again, but I knew that there was no use arguing with her.

“If you’re going to be back for a couple of months, you really should think about going over to Gabby’s tonight,” Annabelle said. “Maybe it would take your mind off your ankle. And you don’t want to stay cooped up in here every day, do you? Come hang out. It’ll be fun. And if it’s not, I’ll send some free tequila shots your way.”

I couldn’t remember the last time I had done tequila shots, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to do that on my first real night here in town. That surely wasn’t going to make a night fun. On the other hand, she might be right about a night out taking my mind off my ankle. I needed to quit thinking about Paris right now, or else I would go crazy.

Also, the director had said to treat this like research. He didn’t want to hear that I had spent months sitting around doing nothing. I had to try at least a little bit, but I couldn’t help cringing at the thought of it. There wasn’t anyone in this old town that I really wanted to see, and I had a feeling that this night was only going to drive that home to me even more.

But what else was I going to do?

“All right, I’ll be there,” I promised Annabelle. She and Mom both beamed at me, enough that it was almost worth it.

Almost.