I couldn’t un-see it.
Even now, as Ares towered over me, his broad shoulders and muscular arms caging me in, making me bow down beneath his rage, I could think of nothing but the bloodbath we’d left behind.
The screams. I –
I would never be able to un-hear those screams. Muffled, wet. Somehow, the fact that they hadn’t even been able to scream properly as they’d died had made it worse. That last piece of defiance had been stolen from them.
Ares had yanked me inside, all the way up to his bedroom. My arm still ached and throbbed. I held onto that pain; I would take anything, a thousand times over, if only those men had not had to suffer.
“Why did you lie to me?” Ares’s voice was more gravel than honey, now. I could feel the low vibrations rolling in his chest. “What purpose did that serve?”
I lifted my chin. He would not steal me defiance from me as well. “I was wor
My lip curled as Nazte stepped into the bedroom I shared with Ares. His eyes were bright – limned with some dark fantasy about murdering me, probably.“What do you want?” I asked. I’d been aiming for callous and disinterested, but my voice croaked – hoarse from being strangled, no doubt – and it made the whole illusion a lot weaker than I’d intended.His blue eyes tightened, and then darted back to the door he’d just come through. I sighed. I didn’t have time for this – I needed to make a plan and send word to my parents about what I’d witnessed and, worse, the terrible things I might have set in motion by giving away the true identity of my attacks.Unfortunately for Nazte, a little chit-chat about the horrors he’d inflicted upon innocent men didn’t quite fit into my schedule. I let my upper lip curl back further and bared my teeth at him.“Scary,” he said, hi
I decided to follow Nazte.Maybe it was stupid to stick my neck out and risk being caught so soon after Ares had unpicked my most recent – and most damning – lie, but I didn’t care. He’d hurt me in more ways than one, and if one of these awful wolves were going to kill me then I’d go down fighting, damn it.I eased open the door and slipped out into the dark corridor.Nazte walked quickly, purposefully, with his arms swinging jovially at his sides. His cloak billowed out behind him and his blonde hair bounced with every step. He didn’t look like a man weighed down by a guilty conscience – but, until he’d looked at me with his sad, wide, almost sympathetic eyes, I’d not once thought of him as someone who would face any emotional ramifications for his despicable actions. Apparently even murdering innocent people couldn’t bring down his mood. Stars, he was an arsehole.What on earth h
My chest heaved and my thighs ached. I sprinted on and on and on, the sounds of footsteps thundering down the tunnel behind me growing louder and louder and louder –There was no hope. They would catch me. They knew this tunnel well, and they surely knew every possible hiding place I might go if I managed to escape them.“We heard you!” shouted Cendres. He laughed, the sound of it ringing out, clear and crisp as a pealing bell. “There’s no point in running. Come out and play with us, little spy.”“It’s probably Jonet,” said Nazte. “Wanting to hear what we said about his precious nose.” He cleared his throat and then raised his voice. “We said it was ugly!”I pushed on. My mind spun through a hundred different solutions. I could sprint out, force my breathing to calm, and wander back towards them. Surely they wouldn’t suspect me if I put myself somewhere so obvi
What I had to do made me sick to my stomach.But it needed to be done.I took a deep breath, forcing it to calm my racing nerves. The mate bond urged me onwards, desperate to close the chasm that stretched between Ares and I. For once, my logical mind and my stupid heart agreed on what I had to do.I needed to get Ares to trust me – so that I could kill him.After this morning, and my close call in the tunnels, I knew what I’d have to do to get him to even look at me would make me want to vomit. Even so, my heart pounded at the thought of seeing him again, up close, close enough to touch…Damn it. I ground my teeth together and knocked on the door.“Come in.” Stars, his voice like that – honey and gravel and entirely edible – made my core heat. I bit my lip, swallowed my pride, and pushed the door open.Ares was reclined on the bed. Evening sunlight swept across his featu
I did not see Ares for over a week.I slept in the guest chamber I had first been put in, with no window and only a lumpy mattress. It was not worthy of a Young Luna, but perhaps I was not worthy of that title anymore.I could have just kissed him. I should have.I’d not even managed to write to my parents. My failure, compounded with the endless muffled screams that writhed constantly in the back of my mind, had sent me spiralling. I sat in the darkness of the cave-like room and thought of half-baked plots and plans, none of which would work without me either gaining Ares’s trust or me starting a full-blown war between our packs all over again.I didn’t know how many times I’d considered walking up to him and clawing his head off, but I’d never once moved so much as a toe to actually get up and do it.My parents’ plan made sense. We would be away from Winterpaw, with no witnesses to lay the blame
I stormed back out into the dining room, my eyes narrowed as I hunted out Ares’s smug, arrogant, despicable… Handsome, muscular body. Damn it.Of course he wasn’t there. Of course he wasn’t. He just had to make everything difficuclt, didn’t he? Seething with rage, I glared at anyone who dared come near me and stomped out into the hallway. He couldn’t have gone far.I squeezed my hands into fists. I wanted to shift into my wolf form – so intense was the anger burning through my veins – but that would achieve nothing. My nails bit into the soft skin of my palms. I focused on the tiny spark of pain – and looked down to see red crescents making the soft flesh.I had to get a grip.Okay, I thought, cramming my temper down. It smouldered, a fire waiting to be stoked again, but it was quiet enough that I could see past the red haze edging my vision. It was Sunday tod
I kissed him.We came together in a clash of teeth and tongues. The anger we both felt guided us together, pushed on by the mate bond.And stars – it was heated and rough, and his teeth dug into my bottom lip, and I drove my fingernails into his shoulders. I groaned into his open mouth, moving one hand to pull at the soft, curling hair at the nape of his neck.“Stars,” he growled. “You make me crazy, beautiful.”I snarled. “You are crazy.” I clawed at him with wild abandon, the wolf in my soul urging me on. “I hate you so damned much, Ares.”He laughed against my lips. The sound made my heart swell, and my mouth parted for him. He spoke into me: “Then why are you kissing me like that?”I tightened my hand on his hair, yanking his head back. I moved down his neck, biting and sucking at his hard jawline, leaving red marks to bloom into bruises. There was nothing gentle
I didn’t want to admit, even to myself, how easy it was to forget about everything important when I was wrapped in Ares’s arms. Even as I brushed my fingers over his bare chest and saw bruises blooming where I had gripped him, and fingernail marks beaded with blood, I did not remember the reasons why I had been angry. My soul came alight at his touch, and damn it – I’d had a hard week.I could even forget my responsibilities to my pack, if only for a short while. They would hit twice as hard when I came out of my mate bond induced stupor, but as Ares and I lost ourselves in one another’s bodies I frankly did not care about anything beyond the reaches of his bed.But after, when it all came crashing down, the guilt was ravenous. It ate away at my insides, leaving me hollow as we dressed ourselves. This wasn’t a conversation we could have in a lover’s embrace. I wouldn’t be able to focus if we did.“Tell me about the attacks,” I said, sitting down at the little dinner table. “You told