Chapter 1- Down the drain

                          Remy

Never in a million years did I imagine that this day would come.

The day my high-school sweet-heart and soon to be fiancé, looked me in the eye and shattered my heart.

August Wilmer had been my day one from the very beginning. Our mom's were best friends and that automatically made us friends. He was always right by my side even before high school and it wasn't long before we became inseparable.

A lot of people weren't surprised when we started dating a few years later.

It was a kind of relationship that slowly blossomed from friendship to love.

We told each other any and everything.

And could hardly breathe if we went a single day without seeing each other. He was my soul mate.

Now, standing in front of me, drenched from his head to his toe, exposed to the pouring rain, with a blank expression on his face, made my heart pound violently.

“What did you say?” My voice shook.

August didn't flinch, he just stared at me still with an unreadable expression. 

“ I don't think I can do this anymore.”

I stared at him, the words sliding through my ears like a foreign language.

“ August, please tell me you're joking. Did someone pay you to prank me? Because this is…this is really funny.” I inquired, a nervous laugh almost slipping out.

His jaw tightened. “Do I look like I'm joking to you? I don't love you anymore, Remy. The sooner you get that into your head, the better for the both of us.”

I blinked rapidly. This was starting to look real.

In all my years with August, the only time I had seen him like this was when he openly challenged the school bully, and beat the living daylights out of him.

This man in front of me wasn't my August. Something had to be wrong.

“ Did something happen? You know you can tell me anything. Just…come inside, let's talk about it.” I stuttered, my trembling hands reached for his.

As if repulsed by my touch, he quickly evaded it and took a few steps backwards. His eyes locked into mine with chilling finality.

“The only reason I'm here is because I owed it to you not to break up with you over a text or call. You don't deserve that.”

And I deserve this?

A thousand and one questions ran through my mind at once, but not a single word escaped my lips.

  “I know this doesn't make sense to you,” he continued, “And I'm sorry I waited this long. I guess I'm just sick and tired of pretending.”

His words slapped harder than any hand could. My chest tightened. “ You don't mean that.”

“Yes I do. With every bone in my body. I did love you, in the beginning. But then your love just got too suffocating, I can hardly breathe, and the worst part is you still don't see it.”

If loving a person with every fiber of my being was categorized as suffocating, then by all means make me the bad guy.

“I can't believe you're saying this to me. If you felt like my love was too suffocating then you should have said something, instead of leading me on to believe that we were in this together.”

“ I didn't drive all the way here to argue and exchange words with you. I've told you what's on my mind and I expect you to respect my decision.”

His words–brief and cold, blurred my vision. I didn't realize when a quite sob quickly spiraled into uncontrollable wails.

He had seen me cry before, though rarely.

The last time I cried was at my mom's funeral many years ago, he was right there by my side, holding my hand every step of the way.

Now the same man who once comforted me was the one causing my pain.

For a fleeting second, something like regret flickered in his eyes, but it was only there for a moment.

What was I doing?

Crying over a guy who didn't deserve any of my tears?

This was the final time August Wilmer was going to see me cry.

I wiped my face and straightened my shoulder.

“Your wish is my command.” I said a little too calmly 

Seeing the change in my expression, his counternance  shifted, like he couldn't believe I could accept his request so quickly.

“You don't have to act all tough you know. I know you're hurting and you probably need some time to heal.”

Every word from his mouth stung like acid.

How dare he think he had such power over me to dictate my healing. 

He really did have the nerves.

I let silence hang between us for three long minutes, trying to filter what my next words would be.

The last thing I was going to do was beg him to love me again. If he felt like my love was suffocating then this was me releasing him.

“ Like I said, your wish is my command.”

With that, I turned around and slammed the door in his face.

As I closed the door behind me, I quickly rushed to my window to see if he was going to knock on my door. To see if he was going to say all this was a prank. To kiss and make up with me.

But he didn't, instead he walked briskly towards his car, got in and drove off into the night.

It didn't take long before the realization hit me like a blow. I slowly sank to the floor, clutching my chest as though my heart had been ripped out.

This was my first heart break, and it was worse than anything I'd ever read in books or seen in movies

It was raw, brutal and real,  painfully real

That night, I cried myself to sleep. The memory replayed in endless loop, even though I tried to stop it.

I swore to myself never to fall deeply in love with anybody ever again. And I cursed the day I met August Wilmer and whole heartedly gave him my all.