Chapter 6 ( part 1)

* Jeff *

Early in the third week of rehearsals, production hit a snag. When we arrived at the theater, Joseph was nowhere to be seen, and Scott, Mark and Daniel were looking very serious. As had become my habit, I threw a smile Daniel's way. Daniel wouldn't meet my eyes. He looked unusually tense, even for someone as tightly wound as he was. Scott waited until he had everyone's attention, then explained the situation:

"Last night, Joseph's mother passed away unexpectedly from a sudden heart attack. They were a close-knit family, so he's pretty broken up. He's promised us he's not backing out of the part, but he is going to be taking a few days' leave to help his father and sister with the funeral arrangements. He left on the first plane this morning. He asked you all to keep him and his family in your prayers, if you happen to be the praying type.

"In the meanwhile, we still have a lot of rehearsal ahead of us before this show's ready to be seen, and we can't afford to waste any time waiting for him to get back. Fortunately our ASM, Daniel, has agreed to step in as Joseph's understudy in the interim, and to work one-on-one with Joseph getting him up to speed once he gets back. I have to say, I put Daniel through a pretty grueling audition before you all arrived here and he knows the play backward and forward, so we shouldn't lose too much momentum.

"We'll be circulating a card later today that you can all sign for Joseph and his family, and taking a collection to send some flowers to the funeral. For now, Christina and Heather, I'd like you to work on scene six on your own this morning while I go through scene seven with Jeff, Angela and Daniel. In the afternoon, I'll come and see where you are on that, and Jeff can take charge of rehearsing his team."

So that was why Daniel was looking tense. Being an understudy was often part of the drill for ASMs, but not all of them were necessarily cut out for the role. For a guy as shy as Daniel was, this must be nerve-wracking.

Shows how little I really knew about the guy I was now dreaming about every night.

By the end of the morning, I had seen a side of Daniel I never imagined existed. The scene we were rehearsing was primarily a confrontation between Angela and me, with lots of juicy emoting for both of us. The character Daniel was playing was caught in the middle, and pretty much spent the whole time trying to find a way out of his awkward situation. At least, that was the way Joseph had been playing it. Daniel, on the other hand, had realized something I should have long ago. All that complicated stage movement that Scott had us practicing non-stop was a metaphor for the relationships between the characters. We were all taking part in some elaborate dance, and Daniel's character was a full participant, not an observer. He made me realize the guy had an agenda and a point of view of his own. Angela and I, or at least our characters, were so intent on our own little drama, we didn't even realize the way he was contributing to the dynamics of the scene.

It made me wonder if that was a metaphor for Daniel behind the scenes as well. I mean, we all relied on him just like we relied on our stagehands, techs and dressers, and he was damn good at what he did. He obviously paid extremely close attention to everything happening on stage as well as off, because he stepped into that ridiculous blocking as if he'd been practicing it with us all along.

He was also, not coincidentally, becoming more and more fascinating to me by the hour, as he revealed depths of talent and insight I had never imagined. I went home that night and the next feeling light-headed. All my blood seemed to have pooled permanently in my groin. Dream-Daniel was developing an improbably large sexual repertoire during my nightly jerk sessions.

By Saturday, I couldn't hold back any longer. The scene was going beautifully, and when we ran it for Scott at the end of the day, he was, characteristically, bouncing off the walls.

"This is gonna be great! Daniel, you sure you're okay reviewing everything with Joseph and getting him up to speed when he gets back?"

"No problem."

"Well, let me know if you need anything. Good job, all of you. Let's call it a night!"

I strolled over to Daniel, trying to act casual, and not at all as though I were stalking him. He seemed much more confident now, after working alongside us so closely for three days, but I still remembered how skittish he'd been before. He was hunched over his script, making a few notes.

"Hey, buy you a drink?" I asked.

He started, and looked up at me, going right back to that defensive posture. Shit. Come on, Jeff, you can do this.

"Daniel, you've been amazing through this. I had no idea you were so talented. I have to admit, I thought you were just going to be a placeholder till Joseph got back, but you even put me and Angela through our paces. A drink's the least I can do to say thank you, and to apologize for underestimating you."

He gave me one of his long inscrutable sideways looks before finding his voice. "Okay, thanks, I think I'd like a drink. But nothing alcoholic, if that's okay. I'm a major lightweight."

The cafe down the street where I had chatted with Scott before rehearsals began had become a favorite hangout for the cast. I looked around nervously when we entered in case anyone we knew was there. I wanted this guy to myself tonight. Fortunately, the coast was clear, and I took us to a table in the back where there was at least a little privacy. My heart was hammering like a lovestruck teenager as I slid into my seat next to Daniel, and I had to fight the impulse to take his hand in mine.

I was dying to learn everything about him—his family, his favorite color, the names of his childhood pets, his taste in movies, and most importantly, whether he was gay, what drove him crazy in bed, and whether I stood any chance at trying out the entire list with him—but I figured I'd better at least start this on a professional basis. Easier, safer. Damn frustrating.

"So, Daniel, where did you learn to act like that? I've been blown away these three days of rehearsals. You picked up on Scott's blocking like it was nothing, and you've given me insights into your character Joseph never touched on—but please, don't ever tell him I said so! Did you study acting in school?"

He squirmed a bit, uncomfortable with praise, I guessed. "Yeah, I went through the whole theater major at the university here. Acting, directing, production, design... you probably know the drill."

"You studied here? I graduated in '93. You?"

"2001."

The barista called out our drink orders just then—a peppermint mocha for Daniel, a hazelnut latte for me. While I went to fetch them, I did some quick mental arithmetic. Assuming he'd graduated in the standard four years, that was only eight years' difference between us. Eight years wasn't that much. Christ, he had looked so much younger! Maybe I did stand a chance. And we were fellow alumni! I could definitely work with that. I returned to our table and slid his mocha across to him.

"Did you study with Professor Ryan? He was my advisor when I was in school."

"Yeah, he was great. Tough, but he sure knows how to teach."

"I'll say. I think I learned more from him in one semester than I did in five years in Hollywood. So you took a general degree and wound up in stage management. Was that planned or did it just happen? Knowing Ryan, he wouldn't have let a talent like yours slip by him."

"I just wasn't as comfortable being on the stage as I was behind it, you know? Well, no, you probably don't know, you're a natural on stage. I just feel like I'm in an interrogation room or something, with everyone watching you and that bright light glaring in your eyes?"

I stumbled over my next words. For the first time since our encounter backstage, I was getting a full look at Daniel's beautiful face, and all I'd heard in that last sentence were the words "light" and "eyes." Relaxing into the conversation, he had forgotten to adopt his usual defensive pose—chin tucked, hair concealing his expression—and the light coming over my shoulder was indeed sparkling in his eyes. Wait, Jeff, rewind, what were we talking about? I took a sip of my drink to recover my thoughts.