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BLUE MOON 49
*** I’ll never be able to understand how people function with little to no amount of sleep. I sleep a lot, I enjoy it. This is why on the days I can’t seem shut my mind off, I turn to the arms of sleep. I feel like a nightmare. I probably look like one too, so drag my body from the bed late in the morning straight into the shower. Hoping the hot jets of water will make me feel better. I purposely got out of bed late so I don’t have to be up and looking at the time every passing second before noon comes. I am not excited or happy or anything like that, this is something I have to do. I cannot shy away from it, I cannot hide from it. I’ve had days to come to terms with it, and accept that my reality will change when I hear what the Abbot has to say. And also, how I deal with it is up to me, learning and accepting that I do not just share physical characteristics with something right out of a myth, I am trying to accept that I just dont look like them, I am a silver one and it doesn’t
BLUE MOON 50
***I’m restless so I go for a walk.He’s not happy with me, I know he’s not.What I don’t know is why?I try to go over the last few days, He barely looks at me and when he does it is not the same, that smothering look of sheer hunger he usually gives me, which makes me feel hot and embarrassed and good at the same time, is missing. He doesn’t touch me every time he gets like it’s his goddess-given right, whenever I’m in his presence he would hold my hand or smooth down my hair, or put his hand over my shoulder drawing me in to feel the warmth of his body. Now, He’s just cold.Why am I even thinking about this right now? Shakin my head I try to dispel those thoughts to ones that are pressing.I try to consider, truly consider the Abbot's generous offer to take me in, it would be for my own good, he said, I’d be able to learn more about myself, away from prying eyes and mostly, I would not bring any dangerous attention on Dark woods. In as much as I try to tell myself to truly think
BLUE MOON 51
The day I understand the way Zayne’s mind works is that day the wolves grow wings and fly. I roll my eyes at the visual. I’m not even exaggerating this time. He walked me back to the lodge that night and even after our conversation I’m still just as confused, maybe even more so, his attitude towards the whole situation is so contradicting, relaxed, and accommodating one moment and then, brooding and glaring the next. I dont want to keep thinking about him and his hot and cold attitude. Do I care? Yes. Damn it, I can’t even convince myself otherwise. At first, I thought he wasn’t saying anything because he wanted someone to take me and my baggage off of his hands and I wouldn’t blame him, hell I wish someone would take this load off my hands. But now, after his words that night, in the calm level-headed tone, he delivered them. I might as well pick up a branch and start plucking off leaves asking the universe and guessing ‘he wants me, he wants me not’ who knows, that migh
BLUE MOON 52
I’m still leaning on the counter when Tate and Lily join us. She’s wearing a red turtle neck long-sleeved. jeans and hiking boots. Flashlight in hand. Looking all pumped up like she is about to go on an adventure. She just needs a hat and some rope to complete the look, I almost laugh, that is until I see the glare, she aims my way. “I am so pissed at you right now” Lily points the flashlight at me.“I’m sorry” is all I can say. And I am apologizing for a lot, but mostly for leaving her in the dark. “Tate told me everything, why didn’t you tell me?” she flips her ponytail over her shoulder, shooting me a glare, at least she waits until we are on our way there, having just left the compound before she lays it unto me. The guys are a few meters behind us well out of hearing range unless they’re using super wolf ears. I really hope that’s not the case. “We tell each other everything, don’t we? I even told you that time I kissed Kent under the kissing tree when we were twelve, do not
BLUE MOON 53
*** Lily is breathing a little hard by the time we get to the caves, it looks a bit different from the last time I was here. I suppose because it was… glowing? The walls had been shimmering with moonlight, similar to when you cast light against a water surface and it reflects against walls, tonight, the only light in the caves is from the flashlight Lily is pointing at the walls and a few dozen candles that have been placed around the cave so it is illuminated enough to see your way around. The Abbot and two female acolytes greet us at the entrance, bowing low at the waist and holding it for a few seconds before righting their posture. Lily elbows me in the rib, her jaw slacks as she looks from me to the acolytes, then back to me, I simply shrug my shoulders because I have no way of explaining that, I already asked them to stop doing that but the abbot said: you are our goddess in the physical form how can we not serve you? So, I let it rest. It felt like an argument I wou
BLUE MOON 54
I don’t know how much time has passed by the time I open my eyes, the abbot comes before me, my hands resting on my highs, the stone cupped loosely in my palms no longer glowing, he takes the stone now warm from my lax grip, a wide smile on his face like someone who just hit the jackpot. I look around, I’m still kneeling in the cave, the acolytes are standing at the same spot as before, but Lily had moved at some point, now standing at Tate’s side, her eyes, wide. I blink repeatedly to clear my mind, still feeling a little dazed like I just woke up abruptly from a long nap, “Did anything happen?” I murmured lowly, if it did, I must have missed it. Well damn it, this is beginning to become repetitive and I don’t like it. I'm really getting sick of strange lights either knocking me on my ass or zapping me of all the strength in my body, leaving a weird melting sensation. A little frustrated. I shake my head; I make to stand up but the muscles in my legs protest. “Shit” palms fl
BLUE MOON 55
Naya is standing just at the mouth of the cave, the abbot and his followers exit before us, then Lily and I follow, Noah and Tate behind us. I see her giving Tate a questioning look and he shakes his head. “It's done, we will return now,” he says instead. With my eyes, I scan the trees not seeing him anywhere Tate had said he was just outside Damn it. “Come child, I’m sure you have questions” with one hand extended, I fall in step beside the Abbot. We begin the long trek back to the pack territory two male acolytes in front of us, then the ladies before two other guards, I know Lily, Tate, and the others are not too far behind. “What was that we did with the stone? I didn’t feel anything, maybe a little dizzy but that’s about it” “The ritual can only be done once, it is sure evidence that you are indeed goddess touched, and it shows an indication of how powerful the one in question is, it has been done five times in our history” “Only five? I thought there’s being at lea
BLUE MOON 56
ZAYNE Tate fills me in on what I missed during the ritual when the faint scent of rot permeated the air, uncomfortable with its close proximity I circled around to dispatch the feral beings swiftly. Without shifting, it was slightly challenging to pinpoint the location, usually, I can sense trespassers with uncanny accuracy, but tonight, my instinct is already on alert, it would have been impossible to sense additional threats were it not for the rotten scent that clung to rogue wolves, as there were already strangers on my territory in white garb and white dyed hair, the same threats I’ve been tolerating for the past week. I’m going to take my time gutting them just for the mental stress alone, shouldn’t be long now… I fall in beside Tate, having already washed the blood off my hands in the lake I sniff my shirt one last time, the faint smell of rot and blood clings to me and will stay there until I shower it off. “That was fast,” he comments without turning to me, “How many
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