Chapter 4

I can't do this.

I swallow—or rather attempt to swallow the heavy feeling tightening around my throat like a barbwire.

But it was of no use.

My nails find the tips of my fingers, picking. Until splints of skin rip. Until my fingers stain red.

But this time I don't stop. I can't.

Quill Ascendancy.

The car drives through the massive gates lined with symmetrical trees on both sides of the road. Through the window, I can see them.

Young wolves.

All dressed in the same uniform I am wearing. Big smiles on their faces.

Friends reunite. Lovers make out. And the others…they stare, as if they can see through the tinted windows and straight into my soul.

As if they can see what I truly am.

A tainted blood. An abomination.

I exhale, knees dancing against the car floor.

"Stop the car!"

My breath hitches with my head snapping to the side.

He's been here the whole time. But I barely noticed through the shuddering of my nerves and the thundering of my heart in my ears.

Ballard.

The twin brother.

"But we're not at the entrance yet…"

"I said stop the car!" A loud roar rips through him, causing the chauffeur to hit the brakes. The stench of fear oozes from him. Thick and fetid.

The car doesn't come to a total stop before the door swings open as he storms away. His backpack hangs over his left shoulder.

He hates me.

From the moment I saw him.

But a care for him is far from my concern.

The chauffeur continues for a few more minutes as the grand structure of the school looms over us like a mountain.

Tall. Like an ancient cathedral but with the sleekness of a modern museum.

Ahead, I can see cars stopping by a huge fountain with what is probably the biggest statue I have ever seen.

I lift my gaze to the view as my body stiffens in an instant, turning cold.

His face.

The man whose son did all of these. Quill.

I remember it all. Every single angle of his face, all etched in stone right in front of me.

Nothing different from the face I had seen in my father's chambers, just as cold as the statue.

The memories from that night remain like a constant in my head. I sleep and I remember. I eat and I remember.

All while looking forward to this day.

But now it's here and I can't seem to move, fear has turned me crippled.

The wolves outside are all bigger. Of purer blood and way different from the bullies back in my pack.

They'll sniff me out before I even near them.

Can I do this?

"Miss Mortimer!" A voice snaps me out of my thought, I turn to see the Chauffeur gaze through the rear-mirror. "We're here."

Outside, a male servant opens the door. Waiting.

I can't let fear lead me.

I'm here for the boy beneath the wolf mask. I'm here for my revenge. And I'll get him even if it is the death of me.

I will do this.

I take the hands of the servant, alighting the car with my eyes lurking. Scanning.

But it doesn't take long before my eyes catch on someone.

A boy.

My breath catches. My heart slows, and my feet forget how to move.

I'm not staring. I'm held—like something in me recognized him before I did, and it isn't finished looking.

He's tall, broad-shouldered like everyone else here. But his face refuses to blend into the rest of them. He's standing at the far end of the field, hands tucked into his pants.

I should look away. I can't.

And whatever this is, I know he felt it too because he isn't looking away either.

"They're here!"

The sounds of hurrying footsteps and high-pitched screech break our gaze as they all rush towards one direction. Towards him.

"Move!" A screech rings through my ears, bodies colliding against mine and before I can react, I'm at the edge of the water fountain. Stumbling.

No!

Fuck, Not today!

Humiliation at Winterhowl, that I can tolerate. But falling into a water fountain on my first day at a posh school would forever cause a strain to my image.

I can't afford that.

I try to push through the crowd but I fail. They're stronger.

Pure blood. And compared to them, my strength is like an ant to a wasp.

Through the corner of my eyes, I can see Ballard walking through the tough crowd, pushing his way through.

"Hey!" I yell.

He sees me then pauses. Unmoving.

I know I shouldn't have called him. He hates me.

But I judged too soon. Ballard's hold tightens on the strap of his backpack as he walks towards me. His gaze indifferent. Just like I know him to be.

"Please." My voice comes out sharper than I intend, breathless. "I need your help."

He steps closer. Close enough that I see something flicker in his gaze.

"You need my help?"

"Yes."

His hands lift, and I reach for them.

A mistake.

His palm meets my shoulder instead of my hand, and there's no hesitation. Without a warning, the ground disappears from beneath my feet with the fountain rising up too fast.