Chapter 4 The Last Time I Waited

Forrest's hands trembled so badly that he could not undo my coat as he carried me onto the hospital bed.

He stopped a passing nurse, his voice strained. "She's pregnant. She's lost a lot of blood. Please, help her first."

The nurse pushed him out of the examination area.

Before the curtain closed, I saw him standing there, panic flashing across his face for the first time.

That glimpse of fear gave me hope.

Maybe he would stay. Maybe this baby would remind him that we were his family.

After the examination, the doctor ordered me to stay in bed to try to save the pregnancy.

Forrest sat beside my bed and carefully tucked in the blanket around me. "Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?"

I looked at him. "I was going to. That day, you were on the phone with Lyra."

His hand froze in midair. "Lyra and I—"

His phone rang, cutting him off. Lyra's name flashed across the screen again and again.

Forrest declined the call.

Less than thirty seconds later, it rang again. He put it on silent, but it kept vibrating on the bedside table.

I looked at the phone. "Answer it."

"There's no need."

He poured me a glass of water, his movements still steady, but he spilled half of it.

I took the glass, my fingertips brushing his.

Forrest caught my hand and held it. "The baby's going to be okay."

At those words, my eyes suddenly burned with tears. For a moment, I nearly leaned my head against his shoulder.

Then his phone vibrated again.

Forrest looked at the screen. His fingers twitched, but in the end, he answered.

Lyra's tearful voice came through the speaker.

"Forrest, I'm all alone in the wound-treatment room. They want to stitch me up, and I'm really scared… Now that you're having a baby of your own, are you just going to stop caring about me?"

Forrest closed his eyes briefly, then let go of my hand.

He began pacing back and forth across the hospital room.

I did not try to stop him. I just watched as he kept glancing toward the door.

Finally, he picked up his coat. "Lyra has no family or friends in this city."

He avoided my gaze, speaking faster with every word. "You've always been strong, and there are doctors here to take care of you. I'll go check on her and be right back."

"Forrest."

He stopped at the doorway.

I set the glass of warm water back on the table. "If you walk out that door today, don't bother coming back."

He frowned. "Don't force me to choose between you two at a time like this. She's just scared of the pain. I'll calm her down and come right back. You and the baby will be fine. Don't overthink this."

Still, the door closed behind him.

He had not even asked the doctor whether the baby could be saved.

In the middle of the night, I started bleeding again.

The doctor rushed in to examine me. When he finished, he handed me a surgical consent form. "The embryo has stopped developing. There's no point in trying to save the pregnancy anymore."

The line for my signature was short.

I gripped the pen and tried three times before I could write my full name.

When the operating room lights came on, I did not cry.

As the anesthetic entered my bloodstream, a chill crept up my arm.

Before I lost consciousness, I was still thinking about Forrest saying he would be right back.

But even by dawn the next morning, the door had never opened again.

After I was discharged, I had the driver take me home.

All 59 ceramic cups stood neatly arranged in the display cabinet.

I went to the storage room and took out a hammer.

The first cup shattered, sending shards flying to my feet.

Then the second. Then the third.

I kept smashing them until my arm ached and my wounds began to hurt. Then I would sit on the floor and rest for a while before starting again.

When the last crash faded, the living room was empty except for the echo.

I swept the broken pieces of ceramic into a pile, took out the divorce agreement I had already signed, and laid it on top.

I had already submitted the application to freeze our joint accounts and sent out the request for a company audit.

I took one last look around the home, picked up my suitcase, and walked out.

Just before the elevator doors closed, I slipped off my wedding ring and dropped it into the trash can.

This time, I would not wait for Forrest to come back.