Sofia Adams - March, 2012 I ordered another shot and then went to find Jones.He was celebrating because he made a ball in the hole, he was clearly losing, but too drunk to notice or care."I think I'll head back now, I've had enough to drink," I interrupted his celebration for a moment. Maybe I could talk to Anne."Do you think so?" he asked and then raised his hand with his index finger in front of my face. "How many fingers do you see here?""One?" I guessed, laughing."Great, you're not seeing double, can handle one more drink," he winked, trying to charm me. If I wasn't broke, I would find him wonderful for a fling. But even in that, I couldn't find an escape since I arrived in this place.Mick took me back to the counter and ordered two beers."Are you still going to find your friend?" he asked as our drinks were served."I don't know, maybe... Actually, I think she doesn't want to talk to me right now.""If she doesn't want to, are you going to lock yourself in your room then?
Sofia Adams - March, 2012The sun was setting on the horizon of the city of sin, but it still made me sweat. I could almost feel myself getting sick.I spent the day with Mick, and hearing him talk about his sister made me think of my husband... I spent the day trying to forget, but it only took a moment of weakness for the memories to come back with full force.I wanted to say that I only remembered the blood and the countless days in the hospital, but it was worse... I remembered his perfect red hair. I remembered when he would do a clown voice to make me laugh and how he always talked to animals as if there was a real dialogue going on.Sometimes, when I was almost waking up in the morning, for a split second before opening my eyes, I could swear I heard his peaceful breathing as he slept. For a moment, everything seemed normal. But then I would open my eyes, and reality would hit me. I was alone, sleeping on the couch in our house, unable to lie in the bed we shared.That's why it
Sofia Adams - March, 2012The shower was very beneficial for my intoxicated body and mind. The water helped clear my thoughts and washed away the layer of sweat on my body.It almost made me feel better. Almost.I came out of the bathroom wearing a hotel robe and found Ethan sitting on my bed, talking on the phone. He saw me and quickly hung up."She just finished her shower... I'll let you know if anything happens," he said before ending the call."Who was that?" I asked, as it was clear he was talking about me."Anne," he simply replied, not taking his eyes off me.I sighed. Even after everything, she still cared. I didn't deserve Anne."Is she very mad?" I asked, not recognizing the insecurity in my voice for a moment. I think I realized that I had messed up with her."I wouldn't say mad... She's upset and worried about you. I think everyone is," he replied.I silently nodded, diverting my gaze to the floor, wondering if he was part of the concerned group."Thank you for bringing me
Ethan Hernandez - March, 2012I left Sofia's room intending to give her some space. I could imagine what she was feeling... It was the same as what I felt seven years ago when I thought that being with her was betraying my friendship with Nick. But the difference is that I never got to experience what Sofia and I had, whereas she did... She got married, and I bet all her feelings were now amplified by the memory of their time together.I grabbed my cellphone to send a message to Anne. If Sofia's problem was now with me, maybe she would listen to her best friend. I just didn't want her to be alone after seeing how upset she was when I left."Is Sofia doing okay? Can you check on her later?"I typed and sent the message while I was in the elevator heading to my floor. After a few moments, I felt the vibration of my phone in my hand."What exactly happened? Can we meet to talk? If I know her well, she'll want some time alone before seeing anyone."I read Anne's message. It was clear that
Ethan Hernandez – March, 2012I shouldn't have left her alone."Sofia, did you do it again?" Anne asked, looking very sad.Sofia looked around, appearing confused and not quite understanding what was happening, until her gaze fell on me, and she remembered the past few seconds."You brought me here to meet him," Sofia spat, pointing at me as if it were unforgivable for Anne to have done that. "Of all people, Anne."Anne was trying to breathe calmly, and Tom stood up from the table, causing me to stand up reflexively.The people around us had stopped everything to watch the scene unfold without any subtlety. Tom walked over to Sofia and placed his hands on her shoulders."Sofia, this is not the right time for this."Sofia awkwardly pulled away from Tom, almost stumbling in the process, and I had to hold her hand to provide some balance.She looked at me angrily and let go of my hand."I don't need you, Ethan," she said, then looked at Anne. "And I don't need you, Miss Goody Two-Shoes w
Ethan Hernandez - March, 2012"Nick, I knew I would see you again," she said softly, looking at a fixed point in the corner of the elevator. But there was nothing there. Sofia was delusional."You died, and I died with you," she said, seeming angry, trying to reach for something that didn't exist. I didn't know if I should pull her back to reality or let her have that moment. It seemed like she was finally releasing everything she had been holding onto this past year."And I feel so alone all the time, Nick... You were supposed to be here, remember?" By this point, she was already crying again, barely noticing when the floor arrived, and I pulled her into the hallway. Seeing all of that was so sad. It was so much pain.Sofia was cooperating and allowing herself to be led until that moment. But at some point, she abruptly stopped and threw herself to the floor when we were close to my room. I quickly eased her fall, catching her at the last second, but she didn't seem to care about the
Sofia Adams - March 2012I was in the elevator, feeling like the most horrible person of all. Ethan was there with me, but I didn't even notice; I could only think about Anne and everything I had caused.Knowing about the baby and that she had hidden it because she was thinking of me... And how did I respond? By behaving in that shameful way. Guilt was devouring me alive.I felt like I was losing myself. The reality around me seemed distant; it was like the sensation of being underwater. And it was so hard to breathe.Until I saw him. Right there in the corner, looking at me. I smiled widely.I thought I would die without seeing Nick again, but there he was, as if in a dream. I examined his blurry and trembling image, but I would recognize him anywhere."Hi, love..." Nick said softly to me. After a year and a half, it was his voice that I was hearing again; I could hardly believe it."Nick, I knew I would see you again," I lied. Nick smiled sadly, looking at me suggestively."Still a
Sofia Adams - April 2012A week had passed since the scene I caused at the hotel.Anne had been hospitalized the entire week, but even though we stayed in touch through messages, I couldn't see her.In the first few days, I had horrible withdrawal symptoms. Headaches, cold sweats, and body tremors... Ethan was by my side the whole time, making sure I drank plenty of water and ate light meals. I couldn't sleep, and sometimes, I couldn't even breathe.The worst part was the daydreaming. Every now and then, I fantasized about Ethan getting distracted and me going to have a drink. The desire was so intense that I dreamed about it. I saw myself with a bottle in hand, drinking every last drop, savoring that poison. Suddenly, I would wake up with a dry mouth from desire and covered in shame, realizing where my thoughts had taken me.I remember going to the hotel restaurant on the third day after the cravings subsided. Ethan said it would be good for me to see the place with a fresh perspecti