63

ALINA

After he left me, tumbling and needing that feeling of ecstasy he knew how to deliver so well, I just stared at the blank wall. Then Lisa burst through the doors, looking like she was about to break down in tears. I forgot all about what I was feeling and rushed to her. I wrapped my arms around her and tried to comfort her as best as I could.

The last thing I remember before everything went black was how I was holding Lisa, telling her I’d find a way to get Alexander to release Isiah. I told her I doubted he would listen to me, but it was worth a shot.

We were talking about that, and then all of a sudden, a heavy feeling clouded my head. I tried to find something to hold onto, but I ended up falling as everything went dark. When I woke up, something bright was flashing into my eyes.

“Sorry,” the familiar voice said as the doctor pulled back the flashlight she had been holding over my face.

What was she doing to me?

“What’s happening?” I tried to sit up, but she gently gripped my shoulders and tried to ease me back down.

“I know you want to, but you need to lie down.”

“I—I don’t understand. What’s going on?” I looked from my left to my right.

Lisa and Jane were standing to one side, both of them watching me with identical worried expressions. I blinked and tried to sift through my memories, wondering if I’d missed anything.

If anything, I would’ve just thought I fell asleep. What was all this?

“You passed out, but everything seems fine.” The doctor added the second part in a rush, like she thought I would panic or something.

I didn’t understand what was going on. I was more concerned about that than whatever she thought might make me panic.

“Alina, look at me,” she urged. “Can you answer all of my questions?” I nodded.

Whatever she was going to ask shouldn’t be hard. I was fine. This was all just too much.

“How many fingers can you see me holding up?” I didn’t know if that was a real question or if she was joking, but I almost laughed.

Though, she didn’t look like she was here to joke, so I answered her correctly.

“Good, good,” she nodded, smiling in relief. “Do you feel any pain anywhere, or anything unusual?”

I started to shake my head, but something came to mind, so I nodded instead.

“Okay, tell me, where do you feel this pain?”

“It’s not pain exactly…” I thought she’d say something sarcastic about me being dumb, like most of the women in any old pack used to.

I didn’t even know why they were coming to my mind. I shook my head, pushing away the thought, and tried to recall what I wanted to say in the first place.

“Erm, sometimes after I eat, I feel bloated. Like my stomach kind of feels too full.” She stared at me blankly and I looked down, feeling slightly embarrassed.

I regretted opening my mouth. If I had just shut up and said I was fine, I wouldn’t have made a total fool of myself.

“And this isn’t normal? You don’t think it’s just because you ate and your body is recognizing you’re full?” She was still speaking calmly, which was much more than I expected.

“Yes,” I blurted, then shook my head quickly. “No. I mean, I don’t know. I’m just being silly.”

She gave a small nod. She moved closer, and I thought she just wanted to get her things, but instead, she stroked my cheek gently and offered me a small smile.

“It’s okay. Just tell me what you’re feeling. I’m here to find out what’s going on with you.” Her encouraging words made me nod, and I explained again, though it didn’t sound any better the second time.

“You’re bloated?” I nodded.

“Does this happen all the time or only when you eat certain foods?”

I thought back to when it started.

“It mostly just happens right after I finish eating.”

She hummed but didn’t say anything.

“Anything else you feel is out of the ordinary? Fatigue? Dizziness? Nausea?” She looked up when she said the last part, eyes searching my face.

“I don’t feel nauseous.” That was the only one I could answer confidently.

As for the fatigue and dizziness… mostly I’d feel butterflies or what I told myself were butterflies. Though, very rarely, I did feel lightheaded.

But I wouldn’t know. I’m either sleeping, eating, walking, or back to sleeping.

“Okay, how about this, do you think you sleep more than you normally would?”

I thought of all the times I’ve slept here. That was never the case back at the camp.

“Yes, but that’s because I don’t do anything here and I’m always bored.”

“I understand that.” She smiled gently. “I’ll just take a bit of your blood so I can have it tested at the hospital. Just to make sure there’s nothing wrong.”

My eyes widened when she said that.

The first thing that came to my mind was a shot. That big needle in my body. It made goosebumps break out all over my skin. I started shaking my head and tried to pull my hand back even though she hadn’t even reached for it yet.

“Alina—” The door burst open and Alexander rushed in.

My heart jumped at the sight of him, and especially at the relief written all over his face when he saw me sitting up. I knew I wasn’t imagining things this time.

He really was worried about me.

“Are you okay? Do you feel anything?” I shook my head, trying to hide the smile that wanted to sneak out because of his presence and the way he looked at me.

He stroked my arm slowly, like he was afraid touching me too hard would hurt me.

“How is she?” he asked the doctor, who nodded reassuringly, I’m guessing to tell him everything was good.

“Good.”

He sighed and turned to me, cupping my cheeks in his hands.

“You’ll be fine, okay?” I nodded, leaning into his touch when it seemed like he wanted to move away.

“Are you done?”

“Just going to draw her blood for tests.”

Alexander turned to me, and I could see the look in his eyes. He remembered the last time. He reached for my hand and intertwined our fingers, making my heart almost beat out of rhythm.

“I’m here, okay, baby?” My throat worked around a swallow at the term of endearment.

He urged me to keep my eyes on him until the doctor was done. I barely felt anything, lost in his gaze.

I almost lost track of reality. I blinked, and suddenly it was just us two in the room and Alexander was staring at me like I hung the moon.