chapter 61

She had always believed there was someone out there for her. While she might not have thought that love at first sight existed, she knew there was a connection between her and Gray.

Was it love at first sight? If she turned wistful like she did after a bottle of wine when she was home on a Friday night, she’d start to believe they were soul mates. As it was, she firmly believed whatever they had could be really special.

Should they have a baby without using the word love, though? Some people had kids with less commitment and managed it. At least they had chemistry. One of the things Mrs. Wilder had been very specific about was how careful and considerate the shifters were about their women. That was another plus.

“Relax, Gray,” she said soothingly.

He kissed her shoulder and rubbed his cheek on her arm.

“I can’t when the idea of anything happening to you makes my animal agitated. I don’t like it.”

All in all, having a baby with a hot, dedicated and protecting man didn’t sound like a bad idea to her. Her big worry was wondering if he’d ever develop feelings of love for her. She could lie to the world but not herself. She was already imagining Gray telling her he loved her which was probably insane since a day ago she didn’t even know him. But who was she to argue with her heart?

‘You never pick who you love’ her dad used to tell her when she was a little girl. It’s why he tolerated her mother for so many years and Lyss never understood it. Her dad had dedicated himself hand and foot to her mother. What did he get in return? Complaints and accusations of being slow to do her bidding. When her mother left her father, it killed him. He’d died of a broken heart.

Lyss knew there were good men out there like her dad. That’s why she’d kept hoping that she’d find a good guy to be with. Something told her Gray was that guy. So he was a bit on the quiet side. He liked life as a solitary creature from what she saw and she noticed he didn’t make idle conversation. Even with all that, her heart still told her he was the one for her.

“Nothing will happen.” She said the words with conviction. No, she couldn’t see the future, but she’d never been threatened in her life. She and Gray would just have to keep their plans to themselves. “We’ll just keep our plan between us and that way nobody will get the urge to slice me into bits.”

He frowned but nodded.

“You’re right. That’s probably the best thing to do.”

She glanced toward the food and then back at him.

“Think we can eat?”

He jumped to his feet and almost dropped her.

“I’m sorry. I’ll get that.”

“Don’t rush on my account,” she said, then thought better of it when her stomach growled.

“On second thought, yeah, rush. I’m starving.”

Gray laughed. It was music to her ears. He’d gotten upset and worried and they’d only spoken of her giving him cubs. They hadn’t actually done anything yet. No, not really. They’d done quite a lot on his bed. Still, she didn’t want him to get all super protective to the point he felt she needed him to watch her twenty-four seven.

After dinner, she decided to get dressed in case anyone showed up since he told her his two friends had a tendency of coming and going.

“They’re my guards,” he explained.

“Are they your friends?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, so I was right,” she said, sticking her tongue out at him as she slipped into a pair of sweats.

“I have to make a few calls.”

She shooed him out of the bedroom.

“Go, I can wander around and entertain myself.”

After aimlessly roaming the inside of the cabin, while Gray sat in his office making calls, she’d gotten the lay of the land. She now knew there were five bedrooms, a ton of windows, which sort of creeped her out now that it was nighttime, and too much silence. She’d become accustomed to listening to her neighbors yelling on either side of her house. Plus, living on a busy street, she heard cars coming and going at all hours.

Her tour of the cabin ended in what she thought was a family room. The giant TV reminded her of the programs she had not watched all week. Flicking through the channels, she found one of her favorites. She settled in to watch and almost didn’t hear when Gray entered the room.

He sat down next to her, picked up her feet and laid them on his lap.

“You watch reality TV?” He sounded surprised.

“Hey, Deadliest Catch is epic. I still miss Captain Phil and have high hopes the Cornelia Marie will make a comeback. Although, Captain Sig is my all-time fave.”

“Who?”

“Never mind.” She laughed. There was no point in discussing a show he had no idea about. “Obviously you don’t watch this. So what do you watch on TV?”

He shrugged.

“The news.”

Ugh.

“Are you one of those that all you ever watch is news related stuff?”

He chuckled and started rubbing her feet. Hmm that was actually really nice.

“Yeah, I will watch movies too, though.”

She groaned. Boy he was good with massages.

“What kind of movies?”

“Military blow things up kind of stuff.”

“Oh?” she asked, surprised. “Military?”

He nodded.

“I was military for a few years so it is great to figure out what they do wrong in a movie that would never be done in real life.”

“Sorry,” she groaned. “I don’t watch military stuff. I do love anything with nature.”

He pressed on the arch of her feet and she leaned back on the sofa, enjoying every second of his kneading her skin. Men didn’t give her soft touches. She’d given an ex a rub down once when he’d complained of neck pains. Once she’d found out the reason he was getting neck pains was due to peeping on her neighbor through her bathroom window, the massages were dead.

“What about your family?” he asked. “How do they feel about you searching for a mate via the PDA?”

Her leg muscles tensed at the mention of her family. Her mother didn’t know. Heck, she’d love to keep her mother unaware for say twenty years before she told her. Especially if they went through with the whole having babies idea. If Gray changed his mind at any point, she didn’t want to hear about how she’d let another man get away.

“My mother doesn’t know. She feels very strongly that I push men away.” Lyss still didn’t understand how telling her exes she wouldn’t tolerate cheating and lying was pushing them away.

She glanced up from where he massaged her feet, to his face.

“Do you think she will mind when she finds out? We are agreeing to possible offspring here.”

“Since she’s not the one having the babies and I don’t live in her house and haven’t for a long time, I don’t really care what she thinks.”

So maybe that came out a little harsh, but she was tired of listening to other people try to run her life. Her mother didn’t have a man. Didn’t want a man. And somehow knew better than Lyss on what she should be doing to keep a man. All her advice revolved around Lyss sucking up the stupid shit men did and letting it slide. Not happening.