Mag-log inCHAPTER 4
I learned quickly that pretending to be Sailyn meant smiling when I wanted to scream. It meant standing beside the Alpha as though I belonged there, fingers lightly resting on his arm, posture composed, chin lifted…while every instinct inside me screamed to step away.
The council chamber doors loomed ahead.
“You don’t have to grip me that tightly,” he murmured without looking at me.
“I’m not,” I said.
His arm flexed beneath my hand. “You are.”
I loosened my fingers immediately. “Sorry. Habit.”
He glanced down at me, expression unreadable. “You’re doing fine.”
“That doesn’t sound convincing.”
“It wasn’t meant to.”
The doors opened.Conversation died instantly. Every head turned. Every gaze sharpened. I felt it like a physical weight, scrutiny pressing in from all sides.
Be Sailyn.
I lifted my chin, schooling my expression into calm assurance. The Luna they expected. The woman they trusted. The Alpha guided me forward, his hand settling at the small of my back.
The contact sent a sharp awareness through me, heat pooling where it shouldn’t. I nearly stumbled.He steadied me without comment.We took our seats at the head of the table.
The council elder cleared his throat. “We are relieved to see you, Luna.”
I smiled. “As am I.”
The words tasted strange in my mouth.Discussions began, borders, patrols, whispers of unrest along the eastern ridge. I listened carefully, committing names and details to memory, nodding when appropriate, speaking only when addressed.
I was doing well. Too well.
The Alpha leaned toward me once, voice low. “You don’t have to involve yourself.”
“I want to,” I whispered back. “I should.”
He straightened. “We’ll discuss it later.”
Later never came. When the meeting adjourned, the council rose, bowing before filing out. I waited until the doors shut behind them before turning to him.
“I want to sit in on these meetings.”
“No.”
I blinked. “No?”
“They aren’t for you.”
“I’m the Luna.”
“You’re standing in for her.”
His tone was calm. Controlled. Final.
My jaw tightened. “Then I need to know what’s being decided in her name.”
“I’ll inform you of what matters.”
“That’s not the same.”
“It’s sufficient.”
I pushed back my chair. “You don’t trust me.”
“I don’t need to.”
“That’s not an answer.”
He stood, towering over me. “Solyn.”
I refused to look away. “If I’m expected to play her in public, then I won’t be kept ignorant in private.”
Silence stretched.
Something dark flickered in his eyes.
“This is about control,” he said quietly.
“Yes,” I shot back. “Mine.”
He studied me for a long moment, then shook his head. “You don’t understand how dangerous this is.”
“Then explain it to me.”
“I can’t.”
“Or you won’t?”
His jaw clenched.
“Drop it.”
The word landed heavy between us. I looked away first.
“Fine,” I said. “But don’t expect me to smile through decisions I had no part in.”
He exhaled slowly. “You’re dismissed.”
The words stung more than they should have. I turned to leave and nearly collided with him when he moved at the same time. We froze inches apart.
The air shifted.
I felt it again…that pull, sharp and insistent, like gravity tightening around my ribs. He felt it too. His breath hitched. Just slightly.
“This needs to stop,” he said.
“I agree.”
“Then step back.”
“I can’t,” I whispered before I could stop myself.
His eyes darkened. “Neither can I.”
For a heartbeat, neither of us moved.Then footsteps echoed down the hall. We stepped apart instantly. The moment shattered, but the tension lingered, humming beneath my skin.
By midday, I was exhausted. Being Sailyn was more draining than I’d imagined. Every interaction required vigilance. Every smile is measured. Every word is carefully chosen.
When the Alpha summoned me again, I nearly refused out of sheer stubbornness.
Instead, I went. This time, it wasn’t the council. It was the pack. We stood before the gathered wolves in the courtyard, the Alpha addressing them with steady authority. I remained at his side, fingers laced together, face serene.
“She looks right,” someone murmured.
The words made my stomach twist. As the Alpha spoke, I felt his presence beside me…solid and dangerously familiar. Every time he shifted, I was aware of it. Every time his arm brushed mine, my pulse betrayed me.
When the address ended, applause rose.
The Alpha turned to me, voice low. “You did well.”
“Thank you.”
His gaze lingered. “You adapt quickly.”
“I don’t have a choice.”
He nodded once.
We began to walk back toward the keep when I said, “You didn’t answer me.”
“About what?”
“The meetings.”
His stride slowed. “I won’t change my mind.”
“Then I’ll make myself unavoidable.”
He stopped.
“So this is a challenge.”
“It’s survival.”
He studied me closely. “You’re not as fragile as you look.”
I met his gaze. “Neither are you.”
“You’re playing a role,” he said quietly. “Don’t forget that.”
“I won’t,” I replied. “But neither should you.”
His brows drew together. “What does that mean?”
“It means,” I said softly, “that pretending doesn’t stop things from becoming real.”
The bond tugged sharply between us, as if in agreement. He stepped back as though struck.
“This is because Sailyn is gone,” he said firmly. “That’s all.”
I nodded. “Of course.”
But neither of us believed it.
CHAPTER 43 — AlmostI could not sleep, I tossed and turned in bed, staring at the ceiling until the patterns on the stone started to blur. My throat felt dry and my jug was empty, the sheets cold on the side where no one slept. I groaned and threw the blanket off, grabbed the empty glass from my nightstand, and padded barefoot to the kitchen.The house was silent at two in the morning. I walked without thinking, my feet knowing the way, and my mind too tired to form complete thoughts.The kitchen was dark when I pushed the door open. I did not bother with the lights. I found the jug of water by memory, filled my glass, and drank until my throat stopped burning.Then I sat down at the small table near the window and stared out at the dark courtyard.I did not know how long I sat there. I was just sitting, my hands wrapped around the empty glass, my head too full of thoughts I could not sort through.The door creaked and I turned.Damos stood in the doorway, his hand still on the handle
CHAPTER 42 — The NotebookI laid on my bed with the notebook open on my lap, the pen moving across the page faster than my thoughts could keep up. The words came out in a rush, messy and uneven, the way they always did when I stopped pretending and just let myself write.I am tired of being her. I am tired of smiling wearing her clothes like a costume that is starting to fit too well. I do not know where she ends and I begin anymore.I paused, reading back what I had written. My handwriting was sharp, almost angry, the letters pressing hard into the page.I was never the problem. I was never the jealous one. I was never the liar. They made me into something I was not and I let them because fighting back never worked. But I was never the problem.I wrote it again as if writing it once was not enough to make it true.I was never the problem.A third time.I was never the problem.I set the pen down and stared at the page. The words stared back at me, dark and certain, the kind of certai
CHAPTER 41 — Tywin SpeaksI stood at the gate before the sun was fully up, waiting for Tywin to return.I had been standing there for nearly an hour but I did not care. Three days felt like three weeks and every time I walked past his empty post, every time I looked for him in the dining hall and did not see him, every time I remembered that he was out there alone because of me, my chest tightened a little more.The gate creaked open and a group of guards trudged through, their shoulders heavy, their boots caked with mud. And at the back of the group, limping slightly, his face pale and streaked with dirt, was Tywin.I walked toward him before I could stop myself.He looked up when he saw me, and for a moment he almost smiled. But the smile did not reach his eyes. He was too tired for that."Solyn," he said. His voice was hoarse and rough."Tywin." I stopped in front of him and looked at his face, at the bruise forming on his jaw, at the cut on his hand that had not been bandaged. "Yo
CHAPTER 40 — Jealousy Again"I am tired, Tywin. I really am."The words came out before I could stop them, cracking in the middle, and then the tears followed. Tywin did not say anything. He just pulled me into his side and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. His hand was warm and steady against my arm."You have been holding too much," he said quietly. "For too long."I pressed my face into my hands. "I miss my old life. I miss waking up and knowing who I was. I miss not having to pretend every single moment of every single day."He did not tell me it would be okay. He did not tell me to stop crying. He just held me and let me cry."I am here," he said. "I will always be here."I leaned into him. His shoulder was solid against mine. His presence was the only thing in this pack that still felt real."I do not know how much longer I can do this," I whispered."Then do not do it alone."I cried into my hands, he kept his arm around me. The fountain trickled beside us, the courtyard wa
CHAPTER 39 — WhyI sat in the empty archive, holding a book that I had barely read a single line from. I could not stop thinking about Damos and how he reacted when I had defended him in the council chamber. The door opened, putting my thoughts on hold.Speak of the devil.Damos walked in, his steps slow and measured as usual, his boots barely making a sound against the stone floor. He was still in his day clothes, his shirt untucked, his sleeves rolled up, and he looked like he had been walking for a while without any particular place to go.He stopped at the end of my table and looked down at me."You are still awake," he said."So are you."He pulled out the chair across from me and sat down. His elbows rested on the table and his hands clasped together, his eyes stayed on my face."Why did you do it?" he asked."Do what?""Defend me in front of the council. You stood up and you shut them down and you did not have to. They expected you to stay quiet and some of them expected you to
CHAPTER 38- She Defends Him I walked into the council chamber and saw the setup immediately. The elders sat in a half circle facing a single chair in the center. Damos's chair. They meant for him to sit there alone while they asked their questions and made their judgments. The room was arranged to make him look like a defendant.I sat in the chair beside where he would sit, not in the center, beside it.Elder Maris opened the meeting. He spoke about the good of the pack, about stability, and about the need to ensure the Alpha was fit to lead. Elder Tolland nodded along while Elder Corvus watched me from the far end of the table.They left a pause after the opening statement. Some of them expected me to stay neutral or quietly nod. I could see it in the way they looked at me, the way they waited, the way they had already decided what I would do.I stood up."The Alpha has led this pack through a kidnapping, an internal security breach, and a sustained campaign of border harassment fro
CHAPTER 17 — Wolf TroubleI am walking back from the kitchens when I hear the voices around the corner.Two guards stand near the stairwell, their backs to me. Their voices are low but not low enough. One of them shakes his head, his hand pressed to his chest like he is still trying to calm his own
CHAPTER 16 — The TimelineI spread the timeline across the floor and Tywin crouches beside me and goes through it carefully.I have been building it in pieces for days, cross-referencing everything I pulled from the archive with what I already knew.Tywin picks up the first page, he scans it, sets
CHAPTER 10 — The StrategistDamos calls me into the war room after the midday meal. I find him standing over a table spread with maps, his sleeves rolled up, his hair falling across his forehead. He does not look up when I enter. He just gestures toward the chair beside him and keeps talking."Silv
CHAPTER 8 The pack archive is locked at midnight, I know this because I checked earlier, walking past the heavy oak doors twice and counting the guards. The third time I come back with a hairpin and the knowledge that no one bothers to guard old secrets as well as they guard new ones.The lock cli







