Prologue

Prologue

1863

Emily POV

I stared wide eyed as my Ma continued to ramble through her tears. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. There was no way I was going!

“I just can’t worry about you getting your heart broken. I know it’s been six months, but I just can’t seem to move forward. Your Pa was my world, Em. Your sisters are grown and married and I can’t do anything to protect them from this type of tragedy in their lives. But I will protect you. Now, I want you to go and pack your things. Although, you won’t really need them at the convent,” she told me.

“Ma, I don’t want to go. I know that Pa’s death was hard on you, but please don’t make me do this. I can still serve God as a wife and mother,” I begged her.

At seventeen, I dreamed of a husband of my own. Someone who would love me as dearly as my Pa loved my Ma, before the influenza that took his life a little over six months ago. I just couldn’t understand why she all of a sudden wanted to send me away. My sisters were both happily married, living with their husbands on their respective farms. Here in Illinois, the war hadn’t hit us as hard as some places, like Gettysburg. I heard reports that just last month, the little farming community of Gettysburg, Pennsylvania was the center of a large battle, with many lives lost on both sides.

“It isn’t about what you want. Dreams don’t come true and fairy tales with the handsome prince who rides with you off into the sunset, don’t exist. And the sooner you learn that, the better off you’ll be. Now my decision is final. I will be sending word to St. Joseph’s Monastery in Pennsylvania, informing them of your arrival. You will leave at the end of the week. Now, not another word,” Ma huffed, clearly exasperated with my whining.

I knew that I would get no further, now that she had set her mind to it. The one thing I got from my Ma was her stubborn streak. Everything else about me, from my dark auburn hair and my hazel eyes to my above average height were a perfect blend of both my parents. I turned and stomped back to my room, pouting.

“Ahhh! How could she do this to me?” I grumbled to myself.

A few moments later, she knocked on my door, “Emily, dear. It’s really for the best. I will send the telegram in the morning. I’m sure once you have gotten a good night’s sleep, you’ll agree that this is a good thing for you. Now, come wash up for supper.”

I waited until I heard her walk back to the kitchen, before I rose from my bed. It was not going to be a good thing. I had to find a way to convince her not to do this. I quietly made my way to the sink and washed my hands, then began to set the table. It appeared that we were going to have soup again. Ma was so heart broken over losing Pa, that she couldn’t seem to do much of anything anymore and we had soup several times each week. It was simple and didn’t take much work and Ma could stay in bed longer each day.

As we ate in silence, my mind began to mull over all of my options. I couldn’t go to my sisters; they would just tell me to suck it up and go to the convent. My friends, while they would agree with me, wouldn’t offer any viable solutions.  I was well and truly stuck.

It wasn’t until I was cleaning up the supper dishes that I had a revelation. Just last week, I had seen an advertisement in the window of the mercantile. A boarding house in St. Louis had vacancies for young ladies who wanted to be trained in decorum and the proper running of a household. That’s it! That would be my salvation! I just needed to convince Ma to let me send the wire to the convent. Only, I wouldn’t send it. Instead, I would send the wire to the boarding house. Then, I would leave at the end of the week and Ma wouldn’t find out. At least, I hope not.