5

Chapter 5

Shadows in the Music

Clarissa’s POV

Zara and Emily were so good to me, at least. That’s what I thought. I couldn’t believe that, in all my excitement about my first day at university, I’d already found people who seemed genuinely friendly. It almost felt like fate had sent them to me after the betrayal I suffered from that foolish man, Clinton. Certainly not smiles that made me forget, for a moment, how much it still hurt to even think his name.

All I wanted tonight was to drink and forget every single thing, but definitely not Damien. I just want to forget the look on Clinton’s face when he told me I wasn’t good enough and his smiles when I was hurt and heartbroken. Forget the sound of his voice introducing her… Gladys, as his “new girlfriend” on our one-year anniversary. That bitch!

So, I was so excited when Zara and Emily showed me around the party, talking and laughing like we’d been friends for years; I let myself relax. Zara, especially, was talkative, bubbly and funny and talks almost too much, but in that moment it was comforting. I thought she knew better when she offered me a drink, smiling wide as if she had the perfect cure for heartbreak right there in her hand. And I think she did.

I didn’t think twice. I didn’t want to think twice. Never! I was here to drink, only to drown the ache in my chest, and I immediately took the drink from her.

The first sip burnt warmly down my throat. The second one made my head feel lighter. It has this weird feeling and effect. But by the third… something wasn’t right.

Right now, it wasn’t just the buzz of alcohol. My head started spinning in a strange, disconnected way, like the room was a carousel and someone had yanked it into motion. The music faded into a dull throb, the chatter around me turning into muffled echoes.

“Hey… Are you okay, girl?” Zara’s voice cut through the haze, but I could barely hear her. My head hurts so badly.

My vision blurred, and I felt my knees buckle. Emily’s arms were suddenly around me, steadying me. I have never felt so woozy like this bed for just a red wine with 3% of alcohol. I tried to focus on her face, but it was like looking through water, everything wavy and unfocused. Oh god, Clarissa, you need to keep your eyes open!

“What’s… happening to me?” I mumbled, my words dragging; my tongue was heavy.

I pressed one hand to my temple, trying to hold my head still, but the spinning only got worse.

“What… what did you add to the drink? What’s the name of this drink? Why is it so…” My voice trailed, my throat tightening with confusion.

Zara didn’t answer. Her face remained carefully blank. It was Emily who spoke, her tone light, like…too light. “You seem a little drunk, babe. You need to rest. Maybe go home, yeah?”

Her voice was gentle, but it felt rehearsed, like a line she’d been waiting to say.

I gave a half-smile, trying to make light of it. “Actually… Emily… now that you mention it, I feel a little tipsy. Dipsy.” I laughed, but it came out awkward and thin. “This drink… has a very active ingredient in it…”

And that was when Damien’s warning flashed through my mind. I could remember how cold and angry his voice was: “Don’t go to that party, Clarissa.”

I should’ve listened. I should’ve stayed home. But no, I’d gone anyway. Against his will. Against my better judgement. Why am I so stubborn? I promised not to give him troubles, right? Oh no!

Even through the haze, my eyes drifted toward the far end of the hall where the crowd thinned. There, leaning against the wall, a glass of wine in hand, was Clinton. He wasn’t laughing, wasn’t talking. Just watching me like he was waiting for his prey, like a predator waits for the right moment to pounce. His expression was cold, deliberate, and unblinking.

I tried to keep my eyes open, but they kept fluttering shut against my will.

Oh my God, what’s happening to me?

“Why don’t you go to the bathroom?” Zara suggested suddenly, her tone too casual as it broke through my thoughts.

Emily frowned. “Or maybe she should just sit down…”

“No, no,” Zara cut in quickly. “She just needs to freshen up. Maybe vomit a little; she’ll feel better. You know where the bathroom is, right?”

I opened my mouth to say no, but Zara was already pointing. “Down that way. Stairs to the right.”

Emily stepped forward as if to guide me, but Zara put a hand on her arm. “Let her go; she knows her way. ” What is Zara up to!? But I don’t have time to question them; I need to wash my face.

Emily hesitated, but I waved her off weakly. “It’s okay, Emily. I can… I can do this.”

I started walking, my feet dragging on the sticky floor. My body felt strange, too heavy and too light at the same time.

I made my way down the narrow, dim staircase. At the bottom, there was a darker corridor, and at the far end, a small sign: 'Restroom – Female', with a light in front of the signal to help people to notice it.

My hands trembled as I pushed the door open; it was heavier than it looked. I quickly stepped inside.

The bathroom smelt faintly of cheap perfume and disinfectant. My head pounded, my stomach twisting violently. I staggered to the sink and bent over, pressing my palm against my mouth just in time. The bitter taste burnt my throat as I vomited.

I turned on the faucet, splashing cold water onto my face, gripping the edge of the sink like it was the only thing tethering me to reality. My stomach groaned, and I remembered that I drank on an empty stomach!

My reflection stared back at me, pale, wide-eyed, lips trembling.

“I need to go home,” I whispered to myself. “I need to go home.”

You’re okay, Clarissa. There’s nothing wrong with you.

I tried to believe it and comfort myself, and that’s when I heard it. Sounds of slowly approaching footsteps.

At first, I ignored it. This was a women’s restroom; of course someone would come in. But the steps didn’t move past me.

It stopped. Right outside the stall door. My stomach tightened as I heard the door creak open.

“You can use the other door; I’m not done yet!” I said without looking up, but there was no movement. I slowly raised my head, and there he was.

Clinton! Grinning at me like a hungry lion after its prey

I froze immediately. My heart hammered so hard I thought it would break through my ribs.

Did he not see the Female Restroom sign? Or did he just not care?

“What are you doing here?” I demanded, my voice sharper than I felt. “This is the women’s restroom; you should’ve seen the sign before coming in.”

He smiled. That smile. The one I used to melt over. The one that, now, made bile rise in my throat.

I hated that face…the face of a man who could kiss me one day and replace me the next. Who could throw me away like nothing?

The door clicked shut behind him. Why would he shut the door?

“Hello, Clarissa,” he said smoothly, stepping closer. “Did you miss me?”

I gritted my teeth. “Answer me, what are you doing here?” I drew back from him slowly.

He ignored the question, tilting his head. “You know, I saw you downstairs. Staggering around, barely able to stand. Thought maybe you were drunk. So I came in to… check on you.”

His eyes swept over me in a way that made my skin crawl.

“It looks… pretty brutal, and your gown? It looks sexy and hot!”

Holy moly!

My back hit the cold tile wall, and for the first time tonight, I knew…really knew, I might not get out of here.