Chapter 5

Jovian’s POV

I’ve always been the safe one, the quiet one, the guy who sculpts everything out of clay because it’s “art” and not because I’m horny twenty-four seven, but let’s be real, half the time it is because I’m horny, and the other half it’s because Aiden’s the only person I’ve ever wanted to touch for real and I’m too chickenshit to say it out loud.

Been a while sharing a dorm with him, watching him shuffle around in oversized hoodies that swallow his skinny frame, red hair sticking up like he just rolled out of my wet dreams, and I never said a word. Not one. Because what if he laughed? What if he looked at me different? What if he said “dude, I’m not gay” and then everything got weird and I lost the only roommate who actually asks how my day was instead of just grunting? So I kept my mouth shut, kept my hands to myself, kept pretending the way my stomach flipped every time he smiled at me was just indigestion.

Earlier when Aiden returned to the dorm, I saw the look, he was devastated. I knew he was hurt. And being in love with him, I obviously couldn't stay indifferent.

Now I was caught in a tug-of-war between two feelings: anxious because Aiden is hurting, but there was this tiny flicker of joy, this hidden sense of joy. It was a golden opportunity to get closer to Aiden through my role as his favorite person to talk too. Thinking about it made me excited, just for a little while, just for a little while I muttered again to myself, let me be his anchor. And thinking about him was already doing things to me.

Ethan was out there banging some girl like the world was ending, bedframe slamming the wall so hard I could feel it through my mattress, her moans pitching higher every thirty seconds like she was auditioning for p**n, and Aiden had stormed off to the bathroom earlier looking like he wanted to set the whole dorm on fire. I waited five minutes after the noises peaked Ethan’s stupid triumphant groan, her giggly “again?” then I slipped out of bed, grabbed the first thing my hand touched off the hamper because my brain was already halfway gone. Aiden’s good looking undie.

I locked the bathroom door. Lights off. Just the little nightlight plug-in thing glowing orange. I leaned back against the sink, heart hammering already, and brought the fabric to my face. Inhaled slowly . His scent hit me that faint clean sweat he always carried after a long day, a little bit of the cheap body wash he uses because he says it’s “practical.” My dick twitched hard in my sweats. I shoved them down just enough, wrapped my hand around myself, and pressed it to my nose again.

“Fuck, Aiden,” I whispered, voice cracking on his name. “You have no idea.”

I started slowly, long strokes, thumb circling the head every time I reached the top, already leaking because my brain was running a highlight reel of every time he’d brushed past me in the kitchen, every time he’d laughed at one of Ethan’s dumb jokes and his eyes crinkled, every time he’d cried on the couch earlier today and let me rub his back like I had any right to touch him at all.

“Wish this was your mouth,” I muttered, hips jerking forward into my fist. “Wish you were on your knees right here, looking up at me with those big eyes, pretty lips stretched around my cock. You’d be so good at it, I know you would. You’d take it slowly at first, tease me, then suck harder when I begged. Fuck.”

Breath came faster. I pressed the undie harder against my face, inhaled deep, groaned low in my throat.

“And your nipples… god, those little pink ones I see poking through your shirts when it’s cold. I wanna bite them. Suck them till they’re swollen and red, till you’re whining and arching up into my mouth, begging me to do more. I’d pin your wrists above your head, make you take it, make you feel every second.”

My hand sped up, rougher now, slick with precome. The fabric muffled my next words.

“I wanna bend you over this sink, Aiden. Spread you open. Slide in slow so you feel every inch. Hear you gasp my name Jovian, please.. fuck, say it like that. I wanna fuck you till you can’t think straight, till all that tension you carry around melts away and you’re just mine. Just for a little while. Just once.”

I was close, too close hips stuttering, balls tight, when the door handle rattled.

I froze.

Door swung open.

Aiden.

Standing there, eyes glassy and unfocused like he wasn’t fully awake, like the day had finally broken him and he was sleepwalking through the wreckage.

He blinked once. Twice.

Saw me hand on my dick, boxers pressed to my face, sweats shoved down, everything on display.

His mouth parted. No sound came out.

I dropped the underwear like it burned. Tried to yank my sweats up one-handed fumbled, cock still hard and bobbing embarrassingly. “Aiden… wait… fuck… this isn't… ”

He didn’t scream. Didn’t yell. Just stared for one long second, face blank, then turned and bolted bare feet slapping tile, door banging shut behind him so hard the mirror rattled.

I stood there panting, dick wilting fast in the sudden cold, heart slamming against my ribs like it wanted out.

He saw.

He fucking saw.

But did he see the underwear ? Did he register they were his? Or was he so out of it, so dazed from whatever hell he’d been through today that it didn’t click? That maybe he just saw me jerking off in the bathroom and nothing else?

I slid down the wall until my ass hit the cold floor. Pulled my knees up. Buried my face in my hands.

“Please,” I whispered to the empty room, voice shaking. “Please let him not have noticed the underwear. Please let him think I’m just some perv who beats off in shared bathrooms. Please don’t let him know it was his. Please.”

From the bedroom Ethan’s snoring started up loud, post-sex rumble.

I stayed on the floor.

Because if Aiden figured it out, if he realized I’d been sniffing his dirty underwear while whispering how bad I wanted to fuck him, bite him, claim him, then tomorrow morning when he looked at me, everything we’d built, every small kindness, every shared coffee, every time I made him laugh when he was spiraling, would be gone.

And I’d be the creep who ruined it.

All because I couldn’t keep my hands off the one thing I never should’ve touched.