Part 6 : Failure

 I comb my hair neatly in front of the mirror. Today is a decisive day where it is the pinnacle of my studying so far to get a position as a student in the medical faculty at my favorite university of choice. 

So far I have been trying my best to keep learning - taking many try outs to hone my academic knowledge.

My cell phone is ringing. A smile rose from the corner of my lips when I saw the name of the sender of the message was Arga.

Arga: fighting for today, my dear. I bet you can! ❤

My fingers quickly started typing.

Me: don't you wanna come to cheer me up?

I smeared the pink lipstick on my lips. I smiled to see the reflection of my face in the mirror. Those people are right, my and Arga's faces are very similar. Are we matched? Ah, I hope. 

Tiiiiinngg....

Arga: I'm having an event at my campus, honey.

The smile that had appeared on my face slowly faded. There was resentment in my heart when Arga refused to see me. 

Come on, La, you can't be this selfish. Arga's life is not always about you. So, act a little mature !

Tiiiinnggg....

Arga: Are you angry? Come on, it's the day you've been waiting for, La. Don't spoil everything with your annoyance. Okay, after you get out of the exam room, I'll call you 😘 Don't sulk anymore and keep up the spirit, honey ❤

"Ready?" My mother looked through the door of my room.

"Oh, I'm ready, Ma. Let's go there now," I replied. 

My mother and I went to the test site by using an online taxi.

My eyes swept across the campus courtyard in amazement. Medical school is really this cool. 

"Pray before taking the exam, La. Stay focused and surrender everything to God. God bless you, my son," said my mother as she hugged me before I stepped into the exam room.

The atmosphere in the exam room was very quiet. all participants, including me, are focused on working on these complex problems.

I almost screamed loudly because the exam time was up. Even though there are still two English questions that I haven't worked on.

The exam supervisor let us out of the room one by one.

My mom was waiting for me outside the faculty building. 

For some reason my tears dripped when I saw Mom waiting for me alone with her tired face. From here the outline of his face can be seen, indicating that he is no longer young.

Oh, mom, why are you so romantic to wait for me for hours? now I know why papa loves you so much, Ma.

"Are you finished?" asked my mother who saw me walking towards her

I nodded firmly. "But, Mom, I'm hungry," I said, stroking my flat stomach because it hasn't been filled up since I entered the exam room.

"Let's eat meatballs on the side of the road," said my mother as she took my hand - crossing the road before finally arriving at a meatball shop.

My smile broke when the waitress brought two bowls of jumbo meatballs with two glasses of iced tea. 

As usual, the first thing I did was cut open the big meatball.

My appetite peaked when I found spicy octopus in the big meatball. I immediately swallowed it up. 

Super Junior's Superman song is ringing on my cell phone. I smiled when the name Arga appeared on the cellphone screen.

"Hello ...." I said cheerfully when Arga's face appeared on the cellphone screen .

"Where is mother?" asked Arga.

"You didn't ask how I was first?" I asked pretending to be sulky, making my mother and Arga laugh to see me.

"How was the test?" asked Arga . 

"The timing is really fast. I haven't even worked on the last two questions, but time is over," I explained.

"Then how is it?"

I shrugged. "Leave it, it happened."

"She felt annoyed, then immediately ate meatballs," said my mother making Arga laugh.

"You are a meatball woman, La."

"It's good if you say, sir curly," I teased while sticking out my tongue.

"You're getting arrogant, aren't you because your hair is straight?"

I burst out laughing.

                                                             *** 

It's been a week after I took the college entrance exam. According to the information I got, an announcement will be held at one in the afternoon.

I was ready in front of the laptop with a racing heart. on the one hand I can't wait for the results, but on the other hand I'm afraid of my failures.

Tiiinggg...

My cell phone tinkled, making me who was focused on waiting for it to be scattered. I chuckled.

Arga: Good afternoon, my sweet lady. What are you doing, honey? ❤

Somehow I feel annoyed to find this short message Arga. Like bothering me who was anxiously waiting for an announcement.

Me: Shut up you !

Tiingg...

I let out a harsh sigh. Now what?

Arga: Mama said today your exam announcement is right? Leave it to God. I'm sure my adorable lover has been trying hard all this time. I pray from here, my dear ❤

I closed my cellphone when I saw the clock was showing one o'clock in the afternoon.

Immediately I opened the announcement website, I entered my data and password. Then..

YOU DID NOT PASS THE SELECTION

DON'T DISCONTINUED AND REMAIN EXPIRED

My whole body felt weak reading the writing that was clearly displayed on my laptop screen. 

My tears rolled down my cheeks. My heart is very disappointed. How come? So far I've been trying hard to get that medical bench. I also always pray to God so that I can be accepted into medical school. But what? What do I get? It was disappointment. ah, I feel this God is not fair to me.. 

My fingers began to type a message to Arga.

Me: I failed 💔

Soon my cell phone rang loudly. Arga's name is clearly written there. 

"Hello."

"Hello," I answered sadly.

"How about it, honey?" asked Arga in his soft voice.. 

"I failed. I failed to enter the medical school of my dreams. I failed at my goal. Even though I tried my hardest. But why is God never on my side?" I screamed. My whole face was drenched in sweat and tears.

"Baby..."

"I'm stupid, Arga. I'm a stupid woman. I've failed. You can find another woman who is much better than me," I said rambled. 

"Hey, what are you talking about? No, La. No. Listen ... A thousand roads lead to Rome. Not getting into medical school doesn't mean your life is 100% ruined. You remember that! I'll pick you up in the afternoon. We'll take an afternoon bike ride. Okay?"

"Huum," I replied while pursing my lips. 

"Don't beat yourself up again. Wipe your tears. You're so ugly when you cry."

Damn Arga! How can he tease me at a time like this ?

"Have lunch first. You're really going to destroy the world when you're hungry. I'll have lunch first." Arga said goodbye.

"Okay."

I turned off my cellphone. I walked to Mom, cried hugged her and told her everything.

"Arga is right, La. It's okay. It's called competition. There must be winners and some losers. Losing in this will not ruin your life. Trust me. God will bring far more beautiful things to you, honey. "

"Is it true?"

"That's absolutely true, Ella. Now eat," said Mom, handing me a plate of rice and my favorite fried chicken side dish.

With a chaotic heart and hungry stomach, I ate it to the end.