Run or Die

Let go of me!” I kicked and punched, but it was not enough to get the guards away from me. It was never enough.

“Please let go of me.” I began to beg.

“How could you do this to me?” I cried out but Julian ignored me, staring at everything but my face.

I can feel his resistance, his reluctance to do this to me but for some reason he wouldn't stop Lydia.

The pack square was blazing with torchlight when they dragged me out.

Wolves began to gather, drawn by instinct and the promise of a ridicule about to play out.

The rope the guards had used to tie me up had already started biting into my skin as they hoisted my arms above my head, lifting me enough to strip me of my dignity.

Laughter erupts in the square.

“Isn’t that the wolfless dog?”

A series of mockery and insults began to fly toward me.

The she-wolf who I had just wrestled with grinned wickedly.

“I told you you were only a stain in his cloth. Now it’s time to wash you off. Disgrace!” She spits on my face.

I growled at her about to bite back when I saw the claw marks I had given her just earlier.

A tiny bit of satisfaction sits inside me.

My sister stepped forward as she adjusted her clothes like a queen who had just reclaimed her throne.

“Now, let this be remembered,” she announced, “Even family ties and charity has its limits.”

This wasn’t necessary, I didn’t have to be humiliated like this. I didn’t have to be disgraced for what I am.

“I never asked for this!” I yelled, interrupting her speech.

“If I had control over what kind of life I’d live, do you think I’d choose this kind of life?!” I cried out.

“So why do I have to be punished for it—”

“Because you are an abomination, a disgrace. I didn’t see it then but I see it now.” Julian locked eyes with me.

“You’ve brought nothing but backwardness to my reign since I met you. I had only agreed to take you in because I realized you’d be fertile enough to bear me pups, but even that is impossible for you.”

“Then sever our mating bond then, do away with me for good.” I pleaded through angry eyes.

“And have you made me look weak? So my authority would have no strength outside this pack? Never.” He growled.

“I will never sever the bond.”

If he doesn’t love me…then why?

My jaw tightened before I replied.

“Why keep me then? Why keep me when you don’t even love me?”

He frowned upon hearing those words.

“I don’t need to love you to keep you. I just need you bound.”

“No…no, please, sever the bond and let me go…”

“Oh, please Vespera, spare us that sob story.” My sister groaned, shutting me up.

“She’ll be left out here till dawn. Anyone who speaks or gives her anything would be labeled an outcast just like her.”

She ordered the guards to lift me above the ground even higher and my feet ended up dangling from the air.

I don’t try to fight it anymore, I don’t try to cry or beg.

It was obvious that I would never find favour in her sight.

If my own sister could treat me like this, like I’m nothing, then who would care about me?

Not even Julian, the man I had given my all to, the man I had sworn to stay by his side till the day I die. Not even him could love me.

Gradually, the crowd that had gathered to watch my humiliation began to reduce until finally everyone had gone away, either to sleep or they weren’t interested in my suffering anymore.

As I begin to feel dizzy from how long my body had been hoisted up, I feel the rope loosen a bit.

My eyes immediately go wide.

It gives a little again, then a little more.

Every loose of the rope scrapes my wrists, shooting up pain sharp enough to make me wince.

I bite down on my lip, tasting blood, forcing myself to not cry out.

I scan the square and I see the guards who were stationed to watch me. But they’re bored, talking softly among themselves. 

They don’t pay me any mind. And for the first time, I’m grateful for that.

I twist my wrist once more, harder than the last time, ignoring the sound of flesh slightly tearing and the pain my body is experiencing.

When I feel the know slip enough I immediately wrench my arm free with a broken gasp.

I drop hard on the ground and the rope follows suit.

The moment I’m on my feet a shout goes up.

“Stop her!”

“She’s running!”

I burst through the compound gates.

I don’t even know where I’m going and I don’t even think about it, I just let my feet carry me.

I don’t want to die here, I don’t want to be used as a scapegoat or as an instrument for ridicule.

I let the woods swallow me up immediately.

“Get her!” I heard Julian yell from behind me but I didn't stop.

Branches tore at my arms and hair as I stumbled blindly through the undergrowth.

I clutched my chest as I ran, the sounds and light from the pack fading away gradually.

I don’t know how long I ran for, but with how much pain my chest is in I know I’ve ran for a long time.

“I don’t belong to you or anyone,” I sobbed as I ran. “I don’t…I don’t..”

My foot slipped and it felt like the ground beneath my feet vanished.

I screamed as I tumbled forward.

I rolled down a slope, hard and slippery.

The fall knocked the breath from my lungs and my breathing began to slow.

I tried my best to push myself up slowly, but I was too dizzy to move.

As if I hadn’t gone through enough misery I see torches blaze in a wide circle around me.

At first I thought it was Julian who had found me, but the scent was different.

It was more vile, more stronger. I felt like it was layered with some kind of poison that made my skin crawl.

“Don’t come any…closer,” I tried to sound defensive but it was useless.

“And it’s still trying to live?” A strange voice spoke out in amusement.

Although the voice sounded playful there was this authoritative tone toward it that made me want to bow toward him.

I couldn’t see clearly because of how dizzy I was so I couldn't tell who he was, but as his dark grey eyes locked onto mine and the intensity of the stare pulled me toward him, one thing settled into my bones.

Whatever he was…..I am utterly and completely at his mercy.