Chapter 9: The Next Evening

Emma woke to an empty bed. Lucien whistled in the bathroom as he shaved. She braced herself, but he didn't seem angry when she entered the bathroom to shower. He wiped his face with a towel. "Morning."

"Morning," she said. Since he wasn't angry, she felt a little bold. "How was the banquet?

"Pretty good," he said.

He pulled on a shirt. Nothing fancy, so maybe he wasn't going to a meeting today. "What's on your agenda?"

"What's not would be a smaller list," Lucien said and left Emma in the bathroom.

She followed him out. There was something she wanted to do today. "There's a meeting of Lunas today."

"So?"

"I'd like to go."

She stood in the doorway to the bedroom, wringing her hands. She stopped not wanting him to see how important this was to her.

"Why?"

"Because I'd like to be a good Luna."

He frowned. "We've been married for five years. Why the sudden interest in being a good Luna?"

"Because it's time, Lucien."

"Time?"

"Yes. I've been shirking my duties."

She didn't point out that he hadn't let her do her duties as a Luna. That was an argument for another day. It was past time for her to take responsibility for her actions. She'd let Lucien walk all over her. That had to stop. She knew this path was not going to be easy, but she had to change her life. She couldn't be cowed by Lucien forever.

His laugh made her flinch and she hated her reaction.

"Shirking your duties. You amuse me, Emma."

"I'm glad I can be a source of entertainment, but as Luna, I should be doing more."

He cocked his head. "I don't think you can handle it."

"I can, Lucien. You need to let me."

He rolled his eyes. "I've been saddled with you for five years. I know you better than you know yourself, Emma. Just get this out of your head."

He might as well have patted her on the head. She closed her eyes for a moment, letting her anger wash over her. If she lost her temper it would prove him right. She needed grace to get past him. "Please give me a chance Lucien."

He studied her. "I'll think about it."

"The meeting is this morning. I need to know soon."

It wasn't one she had to sign up for, as everyone was welcome, but she didn't want to arrive late. She was already an unknown Luna; walking in late would only increase the rumors that were spread about her.

"I said I'd think about it."

She rubbed a hand down her face, then changed tactics "Would your job be easier if you had a better Luna?"

"Yes, but I don't think you are it, Emma."

"Then why are you still married to me?"

They had known early on that they weren't mates. Lucien had forged ahead with the marriage anyway and Emma had just followed along. It had been expected of her. She looked back on that now and couldn't have been sorrier. If she'd been a stronger wolf, she would have dug in her heels. If she'd done that she and Lucien wouldn't be having this conversation.

She'd once been told that the wrong Luna could weaken an Alpha. Why had Lucien agreed to marry her if she could potentially weaken him?

"Life isn't as simple as you seem to think it is Emma. A divorce would reflect badly on me. As if I couldn't make a good choice as a leader." He waved his hand. "I don't know why I'm bothering having this conversation. I go through this life as if I have no Luna."

Emma flinched again and blinked. He did go through this life as if she didn't exist. She'd never noticed it before. Maybe if she'd produced an heir he might not feel that way, but she'd been unable to. They'd been unable to.

Lucien left on that note and Emma flopped on the bed, curling into a ball. This wasn't going to be easy and she didn't know if she had the heart to do it. The rest of her life unfurled out in front of her and it was more being taken for granted.

"If there was only something I could do to prove to him that I am up for the job," Emma said to the empty hotel room.

Lucien returned just before dinner. "You're staying here again. If you're good maybe I'll let you go out tomorrow."

As if she were an errant child. "I need to eat Lucien. I haven't eaten all day."

"There is room service. Remember?"

He left her again, after changing his shirt. She stared at the closed door. Before she could call room service and attempt to get a meal, the rattle of plates and silverware stopped her. She crept over to the door. When she opened it, a tray with food sat there.

She didn't see anyone in the hallway. She brought the tray into her room but sat at the table by the door. Uncovering the plate she discovered a rare steak, some potatoes, and a salad. She might skip the salad, but the rest was going to get devoured.

Her ears perked up and suddenly she knew that Dex was outside the door. He hadn't wanted to take credit yesterday and she didn't want to scare him away so she didn't open the door.

"Thank you," she said, not expecting a reply.

She didn't get one. "I appreciate not starving."

Still no answer. She dug into her food. "This is delicious. The steak is just how I like it."

Nothing. That was okay. Emma appreciated that Dex was there. "This reminds me of that burger place we used to go to. I used to get that loaded baked potato. This is just like that."

She ate some more in silence.

"I'm impressed that you remembered how I like my steak."

She'd almost said his name. She didn't want him to be uncomfortable, but he had to know that she could sense his Alpha presence. In a way, she'd missed that feeling the last five years. His presence had always brought her comfort. She wasn't surprised that he was an Alpha. He'd always protected her. He'd always encouraged her.

How had she been so blind to not see that Lucien wasn't doing that? That he wouldn't. Her husband didn't have her best interests at heart.

She couldn't share that with Dex. It would be a betrayal of Lucien even if he didn't deserve her loyalty. She would still give it to him because she'd chosen years ago to do what her parents wanted. She would have a long road to proving to Lucien she could be his Luna. Or maybe she should just be a strong Luna, not for Lucien but for the pack.

But she would do it because what other choice did she have?

"That waitress used to get your order wrong, all the time. Vanessa, I think her name was."

That had been a simpler time in Emma's life. No pack responsibilities. Just having fun. She chased away the bitterness.

"I think she had a crush on you. You were always so sweet and patient with her."

Dex was always sweet and patient. He'd never been one of the wolves that had something to prove. She'd bet he ran his pack that way. A strong leader, but willing to listen. There was nothing sexier than an Alpha that had nothing to prove. Confident. That was what she'd always admired about Dex.

"I wonder what happened to her."

Dex wouldn't know and even if he did, he wouldn't answer.

"I'm done. This was delicious."

She heard him get to his feet. She would have to leave the tray in the kitchen again, but she didn't want to scare him away. She didn't want the evening to end either, but his footsteps away from her door told her it was.

She sighed. "Guess that was as good as it gets."

Dex had no business being around her and she knew that. Lucien would look like a fool. She wanted to be strong for her pack, but antagonizing her husband was not the way to do that.

When enough time had passed, Emma walked the tray to the kitchen. She didn't sense Dex in the house anymore and she felt as if she'd lost something.

Funny, she didn't feel that way when Lucien left her.