11

Alexander’s Point of View

The cold night air didn’t bite the way it used to.Not tonight.

The only thing that burned was the cigarette between my fingers. Smoke curled up, lazy and slow, like the thoughts in my head thick, dangerous, unwelcome.

I took another drag, leaned back against the hood of my car, and stared out at nothing.

Missy.

Her name felt like a war in my chest.

The way she looked at Nico, all soft and safe. The way Nico looked back like he’d fight the whole damn world for her.

That should have pissed me off. It did. But not because I hated him. No I hated myself more.

Because he was there.

And I wasn’t.

Nico followed her when she ran.

Nico held her when she cried.

Nico carried her to safety while I just watched from the fucking sidelines.

And why?

Because I didn’t know how to touch something so soft without breaking it.

Because every time she smiled at me, I forgot how to breathe.

Hell, I didn’t even recognize myself around her.

If my father knew if he saw the way I held my breath when she walked into a room, the way I stood still just to hear her laugh.

he’d backhand me so hard I’d forget her name. Love was weakness in his world.

And weakness?

It got people killed.

But I couldn’t stop.

Couldn’t stop the way my heart twisted when I saw her curled up on that couch, wrapped in a blanket like she needed protection from the very air.

I wanted to give her the world and burn it down at the same time.

“Fuck,” I muttered, flicking the ash to the ground.

I wasn’t good with words. Never had been. I was the guy people feared in silence.

The one who didn’t speak unless there was blood on the floor.

But around her? I was a man bleeding in every direction.

And Nico?

He was the one she turned to.

Part of me wanted to let him have her.

The bigger part?

The monster in me?

It wanted to fight.

Not with fists. But with presence.

With late night stares and quiet promises I hadn’t learned how to say yet.

She didn’t need a man like me.

But I needed her more than air.

I dropped the cigarette, crushed it beneath my boot.

Tonight wasn’t about jealousy.

It wasn’t even about winning.

It was about deciding was I going to keep hiding behind silence?

Or finally show her the man behind the monster?

I wasn’t sure yet.

But I knew one thing.

If she ever looked at me the way she looked at him.

I wouldn’t survive it.

And I’d destroy anyone who tried to take that away.

Even if it was Nico.

The hallway felt longer than usual.

Maybe because I didn’t want to be here.

Or maybe because swallowing my pride had never come easy.

But there I was, standing outside Nico’s room like I didn’t just spend the last two years acting like I had it all together.

Like I wasn’t about to ask another man for help over a girl that had me spiraling.

I knocked once, hard. Didn’t wait.

The door creaked open, and there he was shirt half off, messy hair, annoyed expression.

Until he saw me. Then it shifted.

“You good?” he asked, voice low, calm. Nico’s version of polite.

I stepped in.

“No,” I answered.

He shut the door slowly and crossed his arms, leaning on the desk. Waiting.

I hated this.

Every second of it.

But I hated not understanding Missy more.

“I need to ask you something,” I said, jaw tight. “And don’t lie.”

Nico blinked, guarded. “Okay.”

“Do you feel anything for her?”

His eyes didn’t flinch. He didn’t look away.

“Missy?”

I nodded once, fists clenched at my sides.

Nico didn’t answer right away. He stepped around the room, picked up a hoodie, then dropped it again.

Like he was buying time. Or thinking way too hard.

“She’s easy to care about,” he finally said.

Not a yes.

Not a no.

My nostrils flared.

“That’s not what I asked.”

He looked up then, eyes sharp but not hostile.

“You want me to say I’m in love with her or something? I’m not. But I won’t lie she gets to people.”

“She got to me,” I admitted quietly.

That made him pause. Really pause.

“I figured,” he said, voice softer now. “You look at her like she’s the only thing in the room that matters.”

“Because she is.”

Silence again. A beat too long.

“You think I’m better for her?” I asked, and I hated myself for it.

Nico let out a slow sigh. “I think… she needs someone who won’t hurt her, even by accident. Someone patient. And she’s not scared of me, Alex.”

That one stung.

He didn’t say it to be cruel. It was just the truth.

She looked at me like I was fire.

Beautiful, maybe. But dangerous. Untouchable.

“I don’t want to scare her,” I said lowly. “I want to protect her.”

“Then show her,” Nico said simply.

“But don’t confuse protecting her with controlling her. She’s not a doll to keep in a glass box.”

I nodded slowly.

“And don’t play with her,” he added sharply. “If you’re going to do this, be serious about it. Because if you hurt her, even by accident…”

“I’ll hurt myself more than you ever could,” I finished.

We locked eyes for a long moment. Something silent passed between us. A shift. A truce.

He finally walked to the door and opened it.

“You want my help?” he asked.

I nodded once.

“Then you better stop smoking,” Nico smirked. “She hates the smell.”

I snorted. “Noted.”

He patted my shoulder and walked off.

And for the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasn’t alone in this.

I wasn’t good with feelings. But I was good at fighting.

And this time, I was going to fight for her.