Chapter 11: A Forgotten Woman

DEVA LOREN/ LANA ALVAREZ

Alpha Cain and Jade were taken to the other wing of the royal house to rest for the night, putting their faith in me to make them proud by successfully sleeping with him.

I sat in my room, dressed by my maids, looking dolled up and perfect. Middle-aged women came into my chambers to explain the procedure of sleeping with my current husband. My eyes tore away from every vivid description and scenario as they explained it all to me.

A bride excited would be shy. I wasn't shy; I was scared for all the valid reasons.

The nightgown I had on was not made for sleeping. It was made for him.

It hugged my body like melted silk, soft, light, and weightless. The neckline dropped low, too low, showing the top of my breasts like they were meant to be seen. Black lace lined the edge, brushing my skin like a gentle caress. It didn’t hide anything. It only drew more attention like it was supposed to.

I was a wrapped present, and Aaron was to open me up.

The sleeves were long and sheer, loose at the wrists, with silver thread woven through the ends. Every time I moved, they shimmered. A row of pearl buttons ran down the front, small and delicate, stopping just under my hips where the slit began. One step and the gown opened, baring my thigh like an invitation I didn’t want to give. But I had to.

A velvet ribbon was tied around my waist. It didn’t hold me in. It only shaped the softness of my figure, just enough to scream the words without saying it, that I was his to have. The back of the gown dipped low, cool air brushing over my spine, leaving me bare.

I didn’t feel like a woman in love. I felt like a woman burdened by responsibility.

"You look beautiful, Princess Deva," the maids said to me, admiring the beauty that I represented.

"Thank you," I gave them a faint smile before turning to look at myself in the mirror.

"We'll leave you now," they said in excitement for me. I wished that I could wear my cheeks in the same rosy color as they had, but I wasn't happy. No feeling was enough to elicit that feeling in my spirit.

I sat on an armchair, careful to leave the rose-decorated bed in his waiting as part of the ritual for the first-night ceremony.

My feet ached from walking in heeled shoes all day, and my eyes were slowly giving out in fatigue that I shook off with the thought of him walking in at any moment.

Any moment, however, stayed for hours as I sat in my chambers like a forgotten woman.

A heavy feeling settled in my chest. What if Aaron does not come for me?

I checked the antique-designed clock, and it was two hours left until midnight. I bit down on my lip, paced around the room, grabbed a book to study, and read it through.

But I could not focus on the book when it felt like I had been forsaken. Why does he not respect me? He's indirectly telling everyone that my place here has no value from the start, and that was it.

Angrily, I stormed out to the lobby of my chambers, where I could choose to receive important guests, and asked the guards.

"Has Alpha Cain been here? Did he come and then walk back?" I questioned.

"No, my lady," they answered simultaneously.

"Thank you," I said with a firm tone before gracefully walking back into my room in shame.

I did not need anyone to tell me.

He was not coming.

This night, my first night as a bride, will be spent alone. I looked at myself in the mirror as I cried. I felt so alone; it wasn't new to me, the aspect of being and feeling so alone, yet I had never gotten used to it. The feeling of abandonment.

I pledged to myself that very night that I would make Aaron love me. I would do whatever it takes, then I'd shatter all of his emotions and love like that never mattered. I'll give him a good taste of his own medicine.

The birds did their usual routine of happily chirping as early as possible in the morning. They made a glorious musical harmony with their little beaks that made my eyes flutter open and brought my soul alive. I hummed along with them before getting up. Turns out Deva had a pleasant singing voice. Not as sonorous as my own, but enough to be pleasant to the ears.

He never came to see me throughout. Before I slept, I caught word that he was with Sophie for the night. I would be lying if I said that didn't bruise my ego.

Sophie had been winning, how do I win?

The maids came to dress me up immediately they learned that I had awakened. They were silent throughout, saying nothing about last night's situation, perhaps they didn't want to offend me.

Did they pity me?

Do they think I deserved it?

I wore a cream-colored gown with red trimming along the collar and bodice, the skirt wide and structured, swaying gently with each step. The sleeves hugged my arms until the elbows, then flared slightly. My dark hair had been tied back into a loose ribbon, curls gathered low and trailing down my back, soft but neat enough to be proper with a little crown on my head signifying my position.

I walked down the halls to explore the mass of the building again when I met Aaron at the end of the stairs looking up at me with pity. He was clad in a deep forest green coat, fitted sharply across the shoulders, with gold buttons that caught the light each time he moved. A cream waistcoat lay beneath, patterned faintly like pressed leaves, and his cravat was tied neatly at the throat, the same shade as winter snow. His trousers were charcoal gray, tucked just right into polished boots that echoed softly on the stone floor. He looked like he had stepped out of a portrait meant to be admired.

I did not want his pity.

I wanted him to show up to fulfill his duties. I did not expect him to touch me; I only wanted him to be there.

I walked down the stairs, slowly to pack my respect.

"Alpha Aaron," I said coldly.

"Deva, I must apologize for last night. I was going to be there."

"But you weren't," I brushed past him.

He grabbed my arm gently, pulling me back, a signal for the maids to excuse us.

"What do you want now?" I silently hissed.

"I know I left you deserted." He actually sounded sorry, but he was good at pretending. I know that he isn't being truthful.

"This was never supposed to be about love, but it doesn't change the fact that you left me, deserted, all alone, tarnishing whatever dignity I had left, showing I had no place here. I didn't need you to touch me. I just-"

The rest of my words got swallowed by him at the press of his mouth against mine.