Bluff

About an hour later, I am on my eighth Martini, and everything is fun and light, but the atmosphere is not as relaxed as before because I am sandwiched between Vladimir, who is just about ready to make me his sixth wife, and Atlas, for whom I have no idea why he’s still around.

“And that’s how I was banned from all Wendy’s restaurants.” The obese baldie says and I laugh my ugliest laugh, spilling myself a little.

Sasha laughs with me, a little more controlled because she’s consumed half the amount of alcohol I have, and still cares about being pretty. Vladimir smiles, showing off a golden tooth. “You want to go back to my place?”

I smile. “Should I?”

“You should not.” Atlas says and I roll my eyes, turning towards him, I whisper: “What the fuck are you still doing here? I mean seriously. What?”

He actually looks really bored when he shrugs. “What else am I supposed to do? Leave you with him? You’re really drunk, I don’t want you doing something you’ll regret.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Hooking up with someone weird?”

I lift my brow in challenge and turn towards Vladimir, who’s almost as plastered as I am, grab him by his jaw and connect our lips. Then, I look at Atlas and tilt my head. “You meant something like this?”

His jaw is clenched as he glares at me. “You are out of control.”

“I know. Most guys think it’s hot. They think they can change that. They never can.” I smirk and he shakes his head at me.

“I just think you need good influence.”

“Like what? You?” I snort and he gives me a half-grin. “You said it yourself. You don’t know me.”

“What will it take for me to do to so you leave me alone?” I ask and he shrugs.

“I don’t know. I really don’t like it when girls steal my food or drink.” He replies and I lean over, take his glass and finish his drink. When I’m done, I look at him smirking at me and shaking his head. “I don’t know how or when, but you will pay for that.”

“Really?” I bite my lip. “Now I’m intrigued. I lean forward and touch his cheek with my finger, and he looks taken aback. “Do you want to leave, Orbit?” I ask him and he snorts. “Don’t call me Orbit.”

I lean my head to the side, smiling, waiting for an actual answer. He takes a deep breath. “Yes, obviously.”

“Do you want to leave with me?”

I lift my other hand up to touch his other cheek and he swats my hands away. “What, are you kidding? You’re ready to go home?”

I nod, and grin, showing my teeth. I didn’t notice it until now – he’s kind of cute.

Immediately, he stands up, and lifts me up so that I somehow stand, until I topple over, losing footing, and he lifts me up into his arms. I smirk at Sasha and wave. “I’m leaving, my puppy wants to go.”

She laughs. “You have such a strange influence on men.”

I want to reply to her, but Vladimir interrupts me and starts waving me goodbye and telling me to call him. I wave back weakly and then become aware of the strong sick feeling radiating from my stomach.

“Oh my god, I feel sick. I’m gonna puke.” I mumble and close my eyes to make it better, but it only gets worse. The moment we leave the building and are greeted with fresh air, I push myself out of his arms and empty out my stomach on the grey pavement.

I hear Atlas curse and vaguely feel him holding back my hair, as I spend the next few minutes vomiting in front of the entire club. The security guards come, angry, yelling something at Atlas, so I stand up and spread my arms.

“People, people!” they stop shouting and look at me. “Spread love, not hate!”

The guards look even angrier, but I hear Atlas laughing behind me, so I laugh as well and start running away from the scene. His hand grabs mine again, pulling me in a certain direction, and I laugh under the night sky. We slow down in front of a black Toyota, and Atlas opens the passenger door for me.

“Should I get in the car with you, Globe? I don’t know you?” I ask and he gives me a glare that could sour an orange.

“You were getting ready to leave with that weird ass gangster, and you question my intentions? I held your hair back when you were throwing up!”

I lift one of my brows. “You might have a point.”

He opens the door wider and I get in, slowly, like a lady. He gets in, too, and asks for my address, then lets me have a few quiet moments in this car. “You’re really weird. I don’t think I’m gonna come back to the classes, I’m too embarrassed.”

“Oh, please do. I’ll teach you for free.” He grins.

“Okay, I might come after all.” I say and he chuckles. “Do you teach self-defence?”

The mood in the car immediately becomes slightly more serious, and I chide myself for asking that. “I do, actually. Why?”

“You wanna teach me?”

We pull into a street, nearing my home, and an uncomfortable taste forms at the back of my throat.

“I’ll teach you anything you want.” 

The thoughts of the man with mismatched eyes fill my head again. I know that if he attacked me one day I stood no chance, but I would like to think that I would make it out.

I point at a bus stop on the side of the road. “Just stop here, please.”

“What? No, I’ll drive you to your house, I’m not a bus-“

“Just please stop here, Atlas.” I say, feeling weird saying his name, but the magic works and he stops on the side of the road. “My house is really close and there’s no space to turn the car around, so it’s best if you just drop me off here.” I mutter an explanation.

He nods, and then clears his throat, and the atmosphere starts to grow tense. I take one last look at his hair and his black outfit, then grab the door handle. “Thanks.” I say, because I don’t know what else to say.

He smiles. “No problem. See you on Monday, right?”

“Right.”

"Hey, hey, wait a second, please." he asks, grabbing my wrist and I briefly notice the rough skin on his hand, a clear sign of a fighter. I turn towards him. "I have tickets for a concert tomorrow, would you like to come with me?"

“Tomorrow? That’s a bit eager of you.”

“I don’t want you to forget I exist again.” He gives me the cute smile that I’m slowly coming to realize is his typical facial expression.

“I won’t.”

“I don’t believe you.”

"Look, I don't date." 

"Oh." The air grows a bit tense, but still not awkward. I’m not sure anyone could feel awkward in the presence of the retarded goofball.

I briefly close my eyes. "I'm sorry, but no. I don't really – date.”

"Okay." he nods. "I'd still like for you to come with me. How about as friends?"

"I don't know..." I drag out.

"Come on. For the ride."

I squint my eyes at him. "What, are you blackmailing me now? I knew I should've called a cab."

"I'm not blackmailing you. I'm asking you out. Not on a date."

"It feels a lot like blackmailing."

"Well, we all have different romantic approaches." 

I bite my lip so that I don’t smile. What a dork. "Okay, whatever, map."

He smiles. "I like your enthusiasm."

I quickly give him my phone number and he writes in on the back of some old receipt in his car.

"Bye." I wave at him and close the car door.

I close the door, waiting for the sound of him driving off, and he does, but only after I turn towards a house. After he’s gone, I walk back towards the street and a few hundred feet towards my apartment complex.

The darkness around me intimidates me, so my quick steps bring me to my sad, falling apart apartment complex much faster than usual. I walk past the 'suk my dik' graffiti and walk up the starts leading to my apartment, then enter it. 

I've lived here for almost a year now, and it still doesn't feel like home, probably because it doesn't look like it. I haven't put any pictures anywhere, there are no personal items to be seen. Perhaps the only sign of life are my beloved plants, put everywhere I could put them. At times, knowing that I need to water them, is the one thing that keeps me going. I'd also love a pet, but my landlord won't even hear about it. I make a lot of money as a dancer, but each pay check reminds me of the high price of freedom.

I throw my bag on the floor, along with my jacket, and sit down next to it. I pull my phone out and put on Coldplay, then think about the way Atlas's arms looked when he was driving me here.

"Stupid. This is stupid."