Love on Ledger: My PhD Girlfriend Itemized Every Date

Thinking of the feminine voice from the live stream earlier, my ears buzzed, a sharp, needle-like sensation spreading through them.

Even the cost of condoms was recorded as a 50-50 split in the ledger, as her reimbursements to me.

A sigh echoed through the microphone. "Can't you be a little more ambitious, Ben Hope? Do you really wish to live a life as unremarkable and ordinary as your name?

"I've bought the SAT prep materials for you. I've even highlighted all the important points. If you don't put in the work yourself, the gap between us will only continue to grow!"

My girlfriend, Sheila Loom, had always disliked how plain my name sounded. As such, she rarely called me by my full name, except for when she was particularly angry.

I took a deep breath, trying to sound calm. My voice still shook as I spoke. "Should we add the cost of you highlighting those key points to the ledger as well?"

Sheila seemed momentarily confused. "What do you mean? What ledger?"

She continued, holding back her anger, "That money you've saved up by fixing cars isn't going to be enough for me to marry you, Ben. I have a PhD. My boyfriend should at least have a bachelor's degree."

Just then, Sheila's roommate, Marilyn Rivers, walked into the room. She sized me up from head to toe as I sat there in an apron.

"Sheila's just sent me a text," Marilyn began awkwardly. "She told me not to let you into her room if I ran into you at the door."

A strange wave of shame washed over me. I stood, ready to flee.

The door lock beeped, and the door opened. My heart raced. I thought Sheila had returned.

Marilyn turned to face the visitor, her face lighting up with a smile.

"Are you here to return Sheila's study materials again? We just changed the door code. I didn't think you'd know it."

The man in gold-rimmed glasses replied nonchalantly, "Sheila told me the code as soon as you guys changed it."

I felt slightly at a loss. Earlier, I'd spent a whole hour waiting at the door because I didn't know the code to enter. I'd only managed to get in when I ran into Marilyn on her way back.

I supposed Sheila's so-called boundaries only applied to me.

The man noticed me when he turned around. He scanned me up and down as he asked, "And who might this be? Did you guys hire a cook? I thought Sheila usually cooks for herself."

Marilyn cleared her throat. She muttered awkwardly, "This is Sheila's boyfriend. His name is…"

For some reason, I couldn't bring myself to say my own name as I looked at the other man.

The man visibly stiffened before offering a perfunctory apology. "Oh, sorry. It's just that Sheila never mentioned she was seeing someone. That's why I didn't think about it like that."

He proceeded to pour me a cup of tea as though he was the man of the house.

"My name is Saul Harrison. Our department is having a get-together dinner later. Would you like to join us?"

I pushed the mug away reflexively.

"What's wrong?" Saul asked.

"Sheila is kind of a germaphobe. She never lets anyone drink from her mug."

Saul let out a laugh before picking up Sheila's mug and drinking directly from it.

"No way. I drink from her mug every time I come over. I've even broken a few of them."

I felt a bit dazed. I'd only just begun to realize how much of Saul's traces lingered in this room.