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113: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

Author: June Estee
last update Last Updated: 2025-10-18 14:57:27

MARIE:

ASHES OF A DREAM

When I think back to those days with the Tates, it almost feels like another life. Like a dream I held in my hands for a while before it slipped through my fingers and shattered on the floor. For a time, everything was perfect. Too perfect.

After that meal, after the laughter that left my cheeks aching from smiling too much, life truly felt like it had turned a corner. Crumbs was no longer a torn and dirty bear. Mrs. Tate had patched him, filled him, and cleaned him so thoroughly that when she handed him back, he looked almost new. I hugged him so tight that I thought the stitches would tear again. He smelled faintly of lavender soap.

"You see," Mrs. Tate had said with a smile, "sometimes all it takes is a little thread and patience."

Sheila giggled. "He looks like a brand-new teddy."

I pressed Crumbs to my chest and whispered, "He is brand new." But deep down I knew he carried my old scars too, just hidden under neat stitches.

The days that followed w
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  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   114: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIE:Me AloneWe were always reminded that our time in Lockwood was numbered. It fueled our desire to get the scholarship and get a shot at creating a life for ourselves. The day of the test finally came, I felt like I had done everything in my strength. The rest was up to luck, so I just stayed calm and waited to be called into the hall. “You do not seem to be so anxious Marie?” I Sheila asked when she noticed how calm I was.“I guess I have done all I can, Sheila.” We hugged. A lady who was the exam coordinator came in to give some announcements before the test screening and the test itself.“Can I have your attention please?” She called out with such a polished voice, I could tell she was rich.“Let me start by congratulating everyone of you here today for having the courage to dare to have a better life. It shows that your mind is set for great things. It might not come with this scholarship, but it will sure do if you don’t give up. So, clap for yourselves.” There was an upr

  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   113: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIE:ASHES OF A DREAM When I think back to those days with the Tates, it almost feels like another life. Like a dream I held in my hands for a while before it slipped through my fingers and shattered on the floor. For a time, everything was perfect. Too perfect.After that meal, after the laughter that left my cheeks aching from smiling too much, life truly felt like it had turned a corner. Crumbs was no longer a torn and dirty bear. Mrs. Tate had patched him, filled him, and cleaned him so thoroughly that when she handed him back, he looked almost new. I hugged him so tight that I thought the stitches would tear again. He smelled faintly of lavender soap."You see," Mrs. Tate had said with a smile, "sometimes all it takes is a little thread and patience."Sheila giggled. "He looks like a brand-new teddy."I pressed Crumbs to my chest and whispered, "He is brand new." But deep down I knew he carried my old scars too, just hidden under neat stitches.The days that followed w

  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   112: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIE:SURPRISED SHEILAI sat on the bed for a while, staring at the soft sheets beneath me and the wide room around me. It felt almost unreal. The thought kept echoing in my head: I might have just become the adopted daughter of a rich man. A life many at Lockwood only whispered about in the dead of night when they imagined what happiness might look like. I should have been thrilled, but instead, I was frozen, unsure if I deserved any of this.Crumbs lay beside me, his patched and tired body looking even smaller against the massive bed. I picked him up and studied his face, worn yet familiar, as though he were telling me not to ruin this chance. I whispered, almost embarrassed by how desperately I wanted reassurance.“Could this be it?” My voice shook. Of course, he did not answer, but somehow, in my heart, I felt like he did. His stitched smile seemed to say, Yes, Marie. If you do not mess this up, this could be the start of something new.I placed him gently on the bed, pressing my

  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   111: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIEThe SurpriseI cursed myself for not accepting the fact that my life had taken a turn for the better. At least, that was what people kept saying. “You are lucky, now you get to live a normal life, I wish I was in your shoes.” Everyone, and everything indicated better. But I didn’t trust “better.” Better had tricks hidden in its pockets. Better had sharp teeth behind its smile.I stood at the entrance of the house, frozen, afraid that even stepping further inside would expose me as someone who didn’t belong. My thoughts were everywhere like birds startled out of a tree, wings flapping wildly in every direction. I couldn’t catch one long enough to steady myself.The woman, the one who had brought me here was moving around, doing little things I didn’t even register at first. She slipped her shoes off neatly and placed them by the door on a mat so clean it looked like it had never been stepped on. She adjusted the vase of flowers sitting on a console table, tucking one stem back in

  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   110: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIE: GONE I don’t remember the day it happened. Only the moment.Fifteen seconds.That’s how long it takes for your world to split in two.Before, I was folding towels in the laundry room. The steam fogged the mirrors, and the radio was on again just soft enough that the staff didn’t notice. My hands moved automatically. Fold. Press. Stack. Repeat. It was peaceful in that dull, mechanical way.Then I heard my name over the speaker in the hallway.“Marie. Administration.”Just like that.Girls looked at me like I was going somewhere worse than the place we already lived. Like maybe I wouldn’t come back.I tried not to show fear. I placed the towel down slowly, wiped my hands, and walked out.The hallway outside the admin room smelled like bleach. Too clean. Like it was trying to cover something up.The receptionist didn’t smile at me. She just pointed to the door.“Go in. Close it behind you.”The man waiting inside wasn’t part of the regular staff.He wore a long coat, not a unifo

  • MISTRESS OF THE GAME   109: MARIE'S CHILDHOOD

    MARIE:YEARS IN THE SHADOWSTime doesn’t pass the same way when every day looks like the one before. There’s no calendar on the wall at Lockwood. Only routines; wake, clean, eat, work, sleep, repeat.I stopped waiting for anyone to come for me. That’s how I survived.By twelve, my legs were longer. My face had changed. One of the girls said I looked older than I should. I didn’t know what that meant. I only knew that when I passed mirrors, I barely recognized the girl looking back.She had dark circles under her eyes and lips that didn’t smile anymore. I learned how to disappear inside myself.I got good at blending in. Keeping my head down. Keeping my thoughts secret. Because thoughts were dangerous in a place like this. It felt like if I think too loudly, someone might hear it, if I hope too brightly, someone might crush it.The hallway near the bathroom had a crack in the wall. That crack became my spot. After dinner, after lights out, when everyone else fell into restless sleep, I

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