Back To Them

Chapter Four _ Back To Them

Aria’s POV

I returned back to the table, I forced myself to act normal, to act as if nothing had happened between me and Alex.

I sat quietly among them like nothing had happened earlier, like the words Alex had said at the back of the hotel meant nothing.

But I was falling apart, I was falling and I wanted someone to notice that, I wanted someone to care. 

I looked at Alex, he was sitting beside the other lady, his gaze on her and he smiled. A real smile and the smile doesn't look forced, it was natural.

This smile, I hadn't seen in a long time..I used to wait for that smile, I could do anything to see that, I understand, it's not that hard for him, just that, the smile wasn't for me.

Then Clara suddenly laughed loudly.

“Oh! Wow” she said, “ I think you want to cry watching these two love birds”

I started sweating all over my body.

I quickly raised my head, forcing myself to smile but it was hard.

“I… I am fine, Clara”

Clara laughed out louder and this made Mama's expression brighten instantly.

“You are such a lovely girl” she said touching her hands, “You are classic, elegant, composed, Alex has a good eye”

“They look perfect together,” Clara added.

Those words didn't just hurt me, they sank into me deeply

My fingers tightened around my dress under the table, I lowered my gaze because at that moment, I felt invisible, I was not wanted

Alex didn't even look at me, not even for once. His attention stayed on her like I was not even sitting there . He listened carefully when she spoke, he poured her drinks carefully.

But this act hurt more than anything else, it was everything I had hoped.

I knew I needed to leave, so I stood up,but Clara’s voice stopped me…

“Where are you going?*l*

I swallowed hard before giving a reply, “Restroom… I needed to use the restroom” but my voice betrayed me. Anyways, I was able to turn and leave.

The money I turned in, tears started flowing from my eyes, it was beyond control, the more I moved a step, the more my heart felt so heavy.

But then I stopped when I heard his voice , Alex's voice, I had left him on that table, how he had got here, I don't understand.

But then, I heard the voice of another woman, Alex's lover.

“What if she gets pregnant now?”

I made sure there was no traces of sound, so I could hear him clearly,

“Even if she does, I don't want her or the pregnancy”

My heart beat painfully, I had… I had thought all he wanted as a child but I was wrong..

“She probably thinks a child would make you change your mind” she said

He laughed, a dry one.

“And baby, there's absolutely nothing she could do to make me stay or change my mind” he said, “A child would only make things worse”

My fingers went numb, just then I heard him speak again 

“And I could never want her that way” he said, “not even once”

I almost collapsed, but I couldn't, I would only embarrassed myself the more.

I tried to hold myself still.

Every lie, everything dawned on me.

I thought if I could give him a child, he would care.

All my hoe vanished instantly, I don't know how long I stood there, I just realized I didn't matter anymore.

Then I heard footsteps behind me. It was her, she looked at me differently, whatever she had to say was to mock me more, I knew…

“Oops! You heard that? I am sorry” she said, “Alex can be harshed when he's stressed.

She touches my arm lightly, like she was offering comfort, but I knew better…

“Maybe it's for the best” she continued softly, “Some people aren't meant to be together”

I looked at her. It's fine.

Well, it's really fine.

Was it her fault? No! It wasn't 

I held on my chest as if avoiding it to shattered

But my body felt weak, wrong, like I was about to faint.

I tried to steady myself against the wall, but my legs almost gave way

“Excuse me” I whispered faintly, even though she wasn't looking at me anymore lm

But I didn't walk too far, my strength began to fade, my head was aching, this wasn't just emotional stress, something was

wrong .

I needed help.

I needed to go to the hospital