Chapter 3

Elena's POV

Adrian stared at me, and in the dark, those blood-red eyes finally filled with anger.

I braced myself against the windowsill to stay on my feet, unwilling to let him see even a trace of how unsteady I was.

I kept the smile on my face as best I could, my gaze steady on the man I'd loved for ten years.

The wind drifted in through the window, carrying a damp chill.

A dull pressure ached in my chest; I'd said too much, and it had drained most of my strength.

But I couldn't faint, couldn't let a single crack show.

I didn't want him to know I was sick.

Still less did I want to spend the last of my time trading my illness for his pity.

That would be too humiliating.

I'd already lost badly enough in this marriage.

The least I wanted was to leave with some dignity.

Adrian lifted his gaze from the divorce papers back to my face.

“Have you really thought this through?”

His voice was cold.

“A divorce does nothing for your reputation.”

I nodded, indifferent.

He spoke more slowly now, as if reminding a child who didn't know better.

“A human woman who was once married to the vampire Prince's heir? No noble house will take you in.”

“No one will want to marry you, either.”

“What kind of life do you imagine you'll have once you leave here?”

Once, words like that would have frightened me.

I knew that, apart from being Adrian's wife, I had nothing left.

But now, hearing them, they didn't hurt nearly as much as I'd expected.

Reputation. Dignity.

The things that had once crushed the breath out of me suddenly looked absurd in the face of death.

I said softly, “Isn't that perfect, then?”

Adrian's eyes darkened.

I lifted my head, that faint smile still at the corner of my mouth.

“After the divorce, my name will be ruined, no house will take me, and no one will speak up for me.”

“Which means you can be rid of me without the slightest burden.”

“Once we're divorced, you're free to marry someone more obedient, someone better suited to stand at your side.”

The line of Adrian's jaw went taut.

I saw the anger in his eyes deepen.

But I didn't stop.

Some of these words I'd held in for ten years.

I'd never dared say them before, afraid that once I did, he'd withhold even his last scraps of half-hearted tenderness.

But now, I didn't need them anymore.

“It's easy enough to explain to the world,” I said.

“You only have to tell them that we were married ten years and I bore you nothing.”

“The Prince's heir needs an heir of his own, so he had no choice but to divorce me.”

Adrian's pupils contracted sharply.

“Elena.”

His voice dropped low, like a warning.

But it only struck me as funny.

I'd borne him nothing.

What a convenient reason.

No one would care about the truth anyway.

He spent far more time with those lovers than with me, often disappearing for two or three months at a stretch.

I waited and waited, day after day, my body slowly wrecked by my own misery; how was I ever supposed to conceive?

The room was so quiet I could almost hear the wind outside.

Adrian was truly angry now.

His chest rose and fell faintly, and the gentlemanly smile had vanished entirely from his eyes.

It was the first time I'd ever seen such plain anger on his face.

No matter how I'd cried before, how I'd railed at him, he had only ever watched me calmly.

Like watching a child who didn't know any better.

Now I wasn't crying.

And for once, something real surfaced in him.

The irony struck me all at once.

When I'd had the least dignity, he hadn't cared at all.

Only now, when I was truly leaving, could I finally rattle him even slightly.

And even that wasn't about love.

It was only that the dog at his heel had suddenly stopped obeying.

Adrian looked down at the papers.

After a long while, he reached for a fountain pen.

The sound of the nib on paper was soft.

Yet it felt as though something had scored across my chest.

I was the one who'd asked for this.

But seeing him actually sign, my breath tightened for a moment all the same.

Ten years.

Ten years I'd waited for him to love me, and in the end I'd lost everything on the board.

Adrian finished signing, but he didn't hand the papers to me.

He closed the folder and pressed it flat under his palm.

“There's a Council of Elders banquet in a week.”

I paused, caught off guard.

He glanced up at me, a measure of his composure already restored.

“It's an important evening.”

“You're still my wife. You'll need to attend with me.”

I looked at his cold, severe face.

Beneath the brief stab of hurt, I found I wasn't even surprised.

This was Adrian.

Even with the divorce papers signed, his first thought was still how the Council would see it, the dignity owed the Prince's heir, and whether my role as his wife could be put to use one last time.

I gave a small nod.

“Fine.”

Adrian seemed not to have expected me to agree so quickly.

He frowned at me.

I knew what he was thinking.

He'd probably braced himself for my tears, only to look up and find a face utterly at peace.

It was only a week.

I'd endured ten years.

I could endure one last week, too.

Once the banquet was over, I could truly leave this place.

Leave Adrian.

Leave the cage that had let me love until I was covered in wounds.

“After the banquet,” he said, his voice cool. “I'll give you the papers, and have someone handle the proceedings.”

“All right. Thank you.”

The moment that thanks left my lips, Adrian's expression turned darker still.

Maybe, to him, my calm was more jarring than any tantrum.

He was about to speak when the phone on the table suddenly lit up.

A faint buzz broke the standoff in the room.

I glanced at it on instinct.

The name on the screen was short.

Clara.

She was the new assistant he'd hired recently.

Young, pretty, the daughter of a middling vampire noble house.

I'd seen her a few nights earlier, at a banquet.

Standing behind Adrian, handing him documents, her eyes always lingered a few seconds too long on the side of his face.

I knew that look all too well.

I'd once looked at Adrian the very same way.

Cautious, and full of hope.

Adrian saw who was calling, and his brow shifted slightly.

All at once, I came fully to my senses.

The faint ache I'd felt watching him sign scattered in an instant, leaving nothing behind.

What was I even still clinging to?

He was never short of company.

Divorce or no divorce, his world would go on turning just fine without me.

Even if the collapse of this marriage felt, to me, like the sky caving in.

To him, it was just a formality to be put off until after the banquet.

I lowered my eyes, and the smile at my lips turned, if anything, lighter and more real.

“Take it.”

Adrian looked over at me.

I said softly, “Maybe it's urgent.”

He stared at me, as if searching my face for some flicker of jealousy or grief.

But I just stood there quietly, bearing the dull pain inside me the way I always did.

In the end, Adrian didn't answer the call.

The phone buzzed until it rang out on its own.

The room fell quiet again.

His face cooled further, but he forced the question out through his teeth.

“Why this sudden insistence on divorce? Have you fallen for someone else?”

I looked at him.

Because I'm dying, and I don't want to die on another night spent waiting for you to come home.

Because I don't want the last thing I hear to be you asking me to deal with one more of your women.

I said none of it aloud.

I only curved my lips a little.

“No. It's just that I don't love you anymore.”

Adrian's gaze dropped sharply.

I knew those words sat far worse with him than “I've fallen for someone else” would have.

If I'd loved another man, he could be furious, could sneer, could lay all of it on my betrayal.

But I'd only said I no longer loved him.

Which meant there was no one else.

And no new excuse for him.

Only that I was finally tired, and unwilling to go on.

That hopelessly foolish Elena, who had craved his love like a lapdog, had finally given up.

He was silent a long time before he said coldly:

“Fine.”

“If you're so set on leaving, then wait until the banquet's over.”

“When it is, I'll see you out myself.”

I nodded.

“All right.”

With that, I turned to go.

I'd taken only a step when my vision went black.

I caught the door frame and barely kept myself from falling.

Adrian's voice came from behind me.

“What's wrong?”

With my back to him, I steadied myself for a few seconds before straightening up again.

“Nothing.”

I didn't turn around.

“Just a little tired.”

That part was true.

I really was tired, almost past the point of holding back the dull ache inside me.

But mercifully, it would all be over soon.