Chapter 3: A present for Lyra.

“Lyra.”

Levi speaks my name tenderly but my whole body goes rigid in shock. 

I stand so still, it feels like a simple breath will topple me, and he notices. Levi steps back a pace, and the feeling of doom in my stomach deepens as we keep looking at each other.

The frown of confusion that appears on his face almost breaks me. 

Worry fills Levi’s eyes as he asks in a concerned tone, “You’re shaking, Lyra. Are you okay?”

Levi takes my hand in his, and the feeling of his warm hand in mine brings me back to life with the force of sudden memories. 

The sensation of his palm…. the skin and the weight of it are so familiar to me, that I can tell this is his hand. Levi is one of the most affectionate people I've had in my life, and I can't believe I just did this to him.

My parents were never affectionate with me growing up.

My father barely held me as a child. He was always tired from work, and when he came back home, all he wanted was quiet so he could fall asleep on the couch in peace. My mother touched me only when she had to so there were no random hugs in my home… no hand holding or walks just for the sake of taking them…

Levi opened me up to a world of affection I didn’t even know existed and he made me feel wanted. He chose me, and made me feel seen… held my hand each time we were in public, and never for once acted like he didn’t want to be with me.

We’ve never fought over anything… except me not wanting to have sex with him. 

Now the one thing that we never agreed on could finally be the thing that ruins what we have, and it’s my fault.

“You look like you’ve just seen a ghost, Lyra. Come on, what’s wrong?” Levi is smiling down at me through handsome eyes as he squeezes my hand one more time.

A hard lump forms in my throat as I open my mouth to come clean to him.

A clear, deep, baritone beats me to it, “She’s just startled. Lyra’s fine.”

My head follows the direction of the voice and our eyes lock.

Christian stares at me with an unreadable but steely gaze that makes me straighten up, nodding through a cracked voice, “Yeah, it’s nothing.”

Levi isn’t paying attention to me anymore.

All his focus is now on his brother and I can almost feel the obsession leaking off him.

Everyone who knows Levi, knows that he deeply wants to be like his elder brother, Christian. 

And anyone who knows Levi’s brother, knows that he doesn’t act like he has the ability to care for anything other than business.

Christian Storm is a well-known figure worldwide.

Single-handedly building up his father’s struggling company into a fearsome group of companies now known as Storm Empire, at the age of twenty-two, Christian has solidified himself as a force to be reckoned with, and at a remarkably young age too.

Levi wants that. 

He wants to be like Christian, and he’ll do anything to get that.

“Um…”

He always seems lost for words around his brother but tonight he gathers some, “I hope Lyra didn’t disturb your rest, Christian?”

When Christian doesn’t respond, Levi’s mood darkens noticeably as he turns to me, his earlier concern for me instantly replaced by irritation at the possibility that I might have disturbed his brother’s rest. His hold on my hand tightens as he grits out nervously, “I’ve always told you not to come around when I'm not home, Lyra. Now look at what you’ve done.”

My thoughts are in absolute disarray and I’m on the verge of automatically saying “sorry” but Christian steps in, again, “Lyra came over to surprise you for your birthday. She met me instead and…”

My eyes widen in alarm at what he’ll say if he goes on but Christian doesn’t. He’s looking at me, his gaze steady and impassive as he concludes, “And you missed her surprise, Levi. You can’t blame her for that.”

I wipe off the panicked look on my face and try to sound calm, “That’s right. 

I asked you if you’d be having anyone over tonight and you told me you wouldn’t, remember?”

My voice trembles, but when Levi responds it’s still in that pissed-off tone, “That’s still no excuse to disturb my brother. Do you have any idea the amount of stress he’s under?”

“It’s alright, Levi.” Christian’s words work like magic because Levi’s face calms down instantly. 

He doesn’t try to berate me for disturbing his precious brother’s rest anymore. Instead, he focuses on making small talk, asking a million and one questions about how and what Christian is doing in the company at the moment.

All the time they talk, I can feel Christian’s gaze wander back and forth, to and from me. I stay mute, but my body aches, and soon I can't hide the discomfort from my face. My legs feel like needles and soon they’ll begin to tremble.

“Why not let Lyra go on home, Levi?” 

Christian’s words call my attention and he’s staring at me again even as he addresses his brother, “You have a party you have to attend, don’t you?”

Levi nods and turns to give me a reassuring smile, his voice tender as he apologizes, “I’m sorry about today, babe. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, okay?”

I force a smile and nod in response. 

Before leaving the apartment, I exchange one last glance with Christian – hoping he doesn’t forget our agreement. 

When I get to my dorm room, there’s no one there. I put on the light and go into the bathroom to take a look at myself. 

My heart sinks when I do.

My face is flushed and my hair is disheveled.

I look like someone who just… had sex. I wonder if anyone looking would be able to tell it was my first time too. Tears brim in my eyes but I clean them off and take a hot shower instead. 

My body thanks me for the heat, and while in the shower, I battle with the urge to either break down crying or simply accept what has happened.

I gave my virginty to my boyfriend’s brother, and now I have to lie to Levi or lose him forver.

……………………………..

After my bath, I reach for my phone to call Cassie, but her line is unavailable. I’m left only with my thoughts, and soon I fall asleep. But dawn comes, and with it a new challenge.

Levi’s birthday party.

Levi always throws a large in-house party in celebration of his birthday.

He invites friends from school and from work. His house gets packed and each time, I stuck out like a sore thumb because I barely know any of the guests. At every party, either the main one or the little ones he throws in clubs, I either end up isolated or stuck to Levi’s side like his shadow. The atmosphere suffocates me, but as his girlfriend I have had to get used to it.

So here I stand, back in front of the apartment where I lost my virginity last night.

I watch the cab I took here drive away and I continue watching it even when it’s well out of sight as I ask myself one question. How do I plan to face my boyfriend and smile at him when I know what I have done?

Maybe I should just stay out here for a while. If I still don’t feel good then… I won’t attend the party at all. I nod to myself, agreeing with my plan.

The sun has barely warmed my face for two minutes when that plan lights up in flames. 

My hand trembles as I see a tall, well-built figure, with burnt gold hair and deep-set blue eyes walking up the road.

Christian’s eyes meet mine and he holds my gaze as he starts walking faster. Faster wowards me!

My body sends a wave of fear through me and I turntail into the apartment as fast as I can.

Once I step inside, it’s like i’ve entered into a whole other world.

Loud music blares from speakers and the sound of multiple people talking all at once fills my ears. 

I see familiar faces from school drinking and laughing, but I can also see a lot of strange faces, talking loudly and laughing happily with each other. 

As I spot Levi, my heart races a beat faster. Levi and Cassie are standing close together, talking about something and laughing about it….. Levi looks so handsome when he grins like that.

I’m still staring when Cassie sees me and walks over, her voice a hushed but eager whisper as she asks, “Hey girl, how did it go? Your big night!”

Cassie’s excitement makes me feel a sourness form in my heart as I shake my head. In a show of strength, I respond simply - sadly, “Levi wasn’t here when I came last night, so the surprise failed.”

Cassie smiles, her face pretty with pity in her gaze as she consoles me, “That sucks, but you can always try again today.”

Levi’s approaching form stops me from giving an answer. 

I go stiff when he reaches us and slings an arm around my shoulder, smiling as he asks teasingly, “Is my girlfriend slowly going blind?”

When I blink in confusion Levi sighs, a sharp charming smile lining his lips as he gestures, “Can’t you see the new tie Cassie got me? It’s vintage, and it costs over 10,000 dollars.”

My eyes drift to Levi’s neck, and sure as day there’s a new tie on it. 

It looks exotic, glistening with gold silk and jewels that form Cassie’s favorite bird, a small, beautiful, dove. I try my best not to sound disheartened as I smile, “It looks beautiful.”

Cassie giggles merrily, “Thanks! I got the idea from you. That’s Levi’s birthday present from me.”

I force an even wider smile onto my face and make a mental note… not to give him the tie I got him as a present anymore.

There’s no way it’ll compare to Cassie’s, and I'll just embarrass myself by giving it to him.

Cassie and Levi start talking to each other about the tie, and soon they’re deep in conversation with each other. I let out a relieved breath, hoping they both continue and just ignore me for the rest of the day. 

A voice that startles me and takes every bit of resolve in me not to start shaking rings out beside me.

“Can I speak to you, Lyra?”

Both Cassie and Levi stop talking at once. 

When I turn, Christian is standing there. Levi’s very real brother.

Before I say anything Levi speaks, smiling broadly as he does, “Why don’t you join us for my party, Christian?”

Christian winces imperceptibly as Levi spends the next few minutes trying to convince him to join his party, but in the end he still refuses. In the face of Levi’s disappointment, Christian speaks bluntly, stubbornly directing the attention back to me, “I have something I want to speak to Lyra about. I don’t have much time to spare.”

Cassie and Levi both look surprised as they stare at me. Under the weight of their gazes I nod, asking nervously, “What is it?”

Christian’s eyes and expression are unreadable for a moment. 

He stretches out a paper bag.

It takes me a moment to gather my courage, but I accept it and ask warily, “What’s inside?”

Before Christian can respond, everything around me seems to fade into the background as I open the bag and see the pack of shiny red pills, all of them in a transparent packet, with one stark label on it.

Birth control!