Out of My League

“GET THE FUCK OUT, YOU TINY DICK FUCK! OH, AND TAKE YOUR TOOTHPICK WHORE WITH YOU!” Yes, I am that woman throwing her cheating piece of trash boyfriend and his skank unceremoniously out of her condo butt-ass naked. Yes, all my neighbors are poking their heads out to see what is happening. Yes, I’m sure the crone across the hall is calling the cops or, worse, my mother. Why would she know my mother? Because my mother got me into this luxurious Manhattan, so not me, building and the crone is head of the condo association. The girl at least has the sense to be ashamed of herself as she hurried to get her dress over her head. “You said this was your place and the woman in the pictures is your sister.” She’s hissing at Trevor, shooting daggers with her eyes. “Shut up, Veronica…” Trevor growled, using both hands to cover his junk. He doesn’t need one hand to cover that tiny thing. “Stop talking, Trevor! Get the fuck out! Out of MY condo! Out of my building! And Out of My life! I ever

I contently sighed, stretching out a satisfied smile on my lips. I can’t remember the last time a man made me orgasm, a pretty damn sad realization. Though that’s on them since, obviously, some men can.  Who would have thought Don would be so damn good in bed? He’s a far cry from the men I’ve been with in the past. But maybe that’s the point. I was going for the social norm of ‘handsome’ and ‘fit’ and coming up short, pun intended. Yet here’s Don, who most wouldn’t call handsome or fit, but that man is packing and knows how to use it. And on that line of thinking, I’m hoping I have another condom, or maybe he does cause some morning sex sounds good right about now. I frowned as I blindly reached t

See, this is how my luck goes. I don’t know why or how, but I must be cursed because it feels that way. Every relationship I’ve had, even briefly like my night with Reese, goes south. Though this is certainly a new record, one night was all it took for it to implode. I’ve never had a one-night stand in my life. This fucking sucks, mainly because I was really into Reese. Sure, we have an age gap, but it wasn’t massive or enough to give us nothing in common. We don’t have much in common, but what we did was enough. I mean fuck, she knew my house is a George F Barber! What other woman am I going to find that would know that?! None. Outside of her max level Karen mother showing up at my door, I thought everything went great. She jumped me as soon as I got her mother to leave my doorstep. We enjoyed breakfast together before I drove her home, and she gave me her number. I didn’t ask for it. She gave it to me. All signs pointed to future encounters, like actual dates that don’t involve a

While I was relieved that her ghosting me was more about her overbearing mother than a lack of interest in me, I was livid with her mother. She’s a lawyer, so she understands the law, and that going cartoon super villain doesn’t work. What fictional world does that woman think we live in? But I can worry and be pissed about her mother later. I have much better things to focus on. Such as Reese straddling me as we tumbled onto the chaise. All issues of our height difference disappear like this. Again, I’m glad I made this, as it continues proving its worth by holding up. I can’t remember a woman who’s gotten me this worked up in such a short time. At least not since high school when I think all guys get turned on easily. I groaned as she adjusted her body, grinding her hips against me. “Fuck… Reese.” Her lips started trailing down my neck as her hands slipped under my shirt, fingers toying with my chest hair. “I don’t recommend that. I have been working on the house, and I can’t imag