Benny's beautiful brown skin looked marvelous against the pale yellow shirt draped onto his muscled frame. Confidence poured out of Benny in every aspect of his life. Totally optimistic. I wish I could be more like him. I was giving it my best shot, but let's just say my best shot at it sucked.
"So this Ethan bloke is trying to get all up in you, huh? I saw how he watched you, Brynne. He never stopped looking," Ben muttered, "not that I blame him." Benny's always been sweet like this. My go-to guy when I need a shoulder. He's nosy, though. I'd tried all night to keep the conversation focused on his photography and gallery show, but he kept steering the talk back to Ethan.
"Yeah, well he has a way of getting the upper hand, and I don't like it, Ben." I dipped my French fry that I refuse to call a chip into some ranch dressing and popped it in my mouth. "And thanks for making an honest woman of me tonight." I ate another fry. "I told Ethan I had plans, which was a total lie until you called."
Ben pointed a fry at me and smirked. "So that's why you nearly jumped me through my mobile." I took a swig of my Sheppy's cider, no longer hungry for the burger and fries.
"Thanks for the invite, my friend." Even to my ears I sounded like a bore.
"Well why don't you go out with him? He's hot. He wants you badly. He can certainly afford to show you a good time." Benny picked up my hand and pressed his soft lips to my skin. "You need to have a little fun, luv. Or a good shag. Everybody needs to get some once in a while. How long's it been?"
I snatched my hand from him and took another swig of Sheppy's. "I am not talking about the last time I got laid, Ben. Boundaries much?" He gave me a patient look even after my kinda rude response. "You definitely need an orgasm, darling."
I ignored his comment. "He's just so well ...... he's the man who looks so dangerous His words, the stuff he does, the raised brow, those blue eyes—" I pointed my finger at my head like a gun and pulled the trigger. "I can't think when he starts in with the commands." I noticed Ben had pushed his plate away too. "You're ready to go, aren't you?"
"Yeah. Let's get your sexually frustrated vagina home. Maybe you can have a date with your vibrator and that will help." I kicked Benny in the foot under the table as soon as he said that.
During the cab ride to my flat I thought about last night in Ethan's car. I obviously felt comfortable enough to fall asleep. That had been a total shocker. I never did stuff like that. Ever. With my history, letting my guard down with strangers was not on the menu, especially the sleeping thing. So why had I done so with Ethan? Was it his gorgeous looks? I'd only really seen his face, but I could tell he was built underneath the silk suit. The man had the whole package working for him. Why me when he could certainly have anyone he wanted?
"So you're booked for a studio shoot tomorrow at Lorenzo?"
"Yeah." I hugged Ben. "Thanks for the referral, honey, and the dinner. You are the best." I kissed him on the cheek. "Vaya con Dios, you sexy man.”
"Love it when you speak Spanish to me, darling!" Benny motioned with his hands toward his chest. "Keep it coming! I want to impress Ricardo next time he's in town."
I left Ben in the cab with a smile on his face, blowing a kiss. I headed up to my little flat that I love and adore, was in my shower in under five minutes, and in my pajamas another ten after that. Every thing was moving on smoothly but when I'd just put my toothbrush in the holder
my phone went off. I looked at the display. Crap. Ethan. I hit accept and gathered the courage to speak. "Ethan..."
"I like when you say my name, so I suppose I'll forgive you for hanging up on me today." His slow, elegant Brit voice settled over me, heightening my awareness of his maleness and the promise of sex instantly. "Sorry about that." I waited for him to say something else, but he didn't. I still hadn't agreed to go out with him, though, and we both knew it.
Finally he asked, "So how were your plans tonight?" I could just picture that mouth of his in a firm line of annoyance.
"They were fine ..... good. I just got in actually... from dinner."
"And what did you order at your dinner, Brynne?"
"Why must you know, Ethan?"
"So I can learn what pleases you" And just like that he did it again! Taking my defensiveness away with a few small words and dripping of sexual innuendo as always. And making me feel like a cold bitch.
"I had a garden burger, fries, and a Sheppy's cider." I felt myself relax a little and softened my tone.
"Vegetarian?"
"Not at all. I love meat- l mean .... l eat meat... all the time." Dear Lord. The brief feeling of relaxation vanished instantly and I was back to tripping over my words like a teenager.
Ethan laughed into the phone. "So a good selection of meats and Sheppy's on the menu will do it for you?"
"Hey, I never said I would go out with you." I closed my eyes.
"But you will." His voice did something to me. Even through the phone, without sense of sight, he compelled me to want to agree just to see him again. To look at him again. To smell him again. I groaned into the phone. "You are killing me here, Ethan."
"No," he chuckled softly, "we've already established that I'm not a serial killer, remember?"
"So you claim, Mr. Blackstone, but know that if you do kill me, you'll be number one on the suspect list."
He laughed at that and the sound of him made me smile. "So you've been talking about me to your friends then?"
"Maybe I keep a secret diary and wrote about you. The cops will find it when they search my flat for clues."
"Miss Bennett has quite the flair for the dramatic. Did she take acting lessons in school?"
"No. She just watched a lot of episodes of CSI."
"Okay, I am getting the whole picture now. Meat, Sheppy's and Crime & Investigation Network. A nice eclectic mix you've got going for you... among other things." He said the last part very softly, the suggestion in the words hitting me directly between my legs. "So where do I collect you tomorrow after your photo shoot?"
"It's a studio shoot, so the Lorenzo Agency, tenth floor of the Shires Building."
"I'll find you, Brynne. Send me a text when you're finished and I'll be there. Goodnight." His voice changed, sounding more abrupt. I heard a click and then the dial tone, realizing that Ethan had ended the call this time. Payback for earlier? Maybe. But as I got into my bed and rehashed our conversation in the dark, I became conscious of the fact he'd gotten his way again. I had a date with Ethan tomorrow night, and I'd never really agreed to go.
I sent the text to Ethan as Marco looked through the images. I'd worked with Marco one other time and I liked him a lot. Based in Milan, he liked classic poses reminiscent of the thirties and forties. "You are magnificent in these, bella," Marco told me with that beautiful Italian purr. "The camera is your friend."/ "It was nice. Thank you, Marco."I still had to get ready and headed for the dressing room. I tried not to fuss over my appearance, but Ethan was so damned handsome. I was just... më. I knew I had a decent figure. I kept it that way, and my body was my livelihood at the moment, so I took care of myself. And I'd had plenty of attention from boys growing up. Too much attention. But I wasn't beautiful. I had long, straight, light brown hair, nothing special. My eyes were probably the most unique thing about me. The color was odd-sort of a mixture of brown, gray, blue and green. I'd never known what to put on my driver's license back home. I went with brown.I opened my bag an
Vauxmoor's Bar & Grill was trendy but not boisterous to the point where we had to shout to talk. I mostly just enjoyed my view anyway. Seated over his plate of steak, Ethan was the picture of polite English gentleman. One supremely hot English gentleman. Gone was the heat and promise of sweaty sex we'd shared at the elevators. He'd turned that off just as quickly as he'd turned me on."How did an American find herself at university so far from home?"I picked at my steak salad and went for a sip of cider instead. "I ..... .. I struggled for a bit after high school", I closed my eyes for a moment after responding. "I was a mess actually, for a lot of reasons." Taking a breath to calm the nervousness that appeared whenever I had to answer this question, I said, "But with some help to focus my attentions, I discovered an interest in art. I applied to come here and by some miracle got accepted at U of L. And my parents were so thrilled to see me motivated they sent me off with hearty bles
"Don't be, Brynne. I try to avoid my hand to get off, especially if there are other, more lovely, options."His fingers tugged on my chin. I felt my body heat up as I let him lift my face. Whoa... breathe, Brynne, breathe."Like you." He whispered the rest. "I want the real thing. I want you underneath me. I want to get off with you?" His blue eyes never left mine. He did not let go of my chin either. He held me firm and made me acknowledge his words. "Why, Ethan?"His thumb flicked out and brushed my jaw. "Why does anyone want any- thing? It's just how I react to you." His eyes rolled over me and got that smoky look in them. "Come home with me. Be with me tonight, Brynne. Let me show you.""Okay." My heart pounded so hard I was sure he could hear it. And just like that I agreed to something I knew would be life changing. For me, it would be. The instant the word left my lips I witnessed Ethan close his eyes for just the briefest flicker. And then it was all a flurry of activity and p
I pushed his fine white shirt off him to the growing pile on the floor. I looked at his bare chest for the first time and nearly wept. Ethan was tight with muscles and washboard abs that melted into the most erotic V-cut I'd ever seen on a man.I leaned forward and touched my lips to the middle of his chest. He put his hands on either side of my head and held me to him, like he would never let go. His strength and dominance were pretty clear. When it came to sex, Ethan was the one in charge. And strangely, it soothed me to understand this. I was safe with him.He moved down to kneeling, his hands sliding down my hips and then my legs. When he got to my shoes, he tugged at first one and then the other and removed them sweetly from my feet. His hands skimmed back up to the waist of my linen pants. He pulled the string and loosened the tie and then dragged them to the floor. He steadied my legs while I stepped out of the crumpled heap of linen, and then he kissed me right above the waist
Ethan still kept his eyes on me. Even after we settled down from the rush of the sex, and after he'd left my body. He pulled off the condom, tied it and got rid of the evidence. But then he was right back, facing me again, his eyes moving over me, looking for my reaction to what we'd just done together."Are you all right?" he asked, brushing his thumb over my lips, tracing them ever so gently. I smiled at him and answered in a slow voice, "Uh-huh.""I'm not even close to being finished with you yet." He dragged his hand down my neck, over a breast, across my hip to rest on my stomach. “That was— so amazing, I don't .... I don't want this to be over." He left his hand splayed there and leaned forward to kiss me slowly and thoroughly, almost reverently. I could tell he was going to ask for something. "Are you on birth control, Brynne?""Yes," I whispered against his lips. I was right. He would be surprised at the reason, but I wasn't sharing that information tonight."I want... I want
He stroked over my head, trailing his fingers through my hair. I couldn't fight him. Not after tonight. The security felt too wonderful, my body too drained from all the orgasms, his hard strength too comfortable for me to battle him on the issue. So I slept. The terrors are real. They come in the night when I sleep. I try to fight them, but they nearly always win. Everything is dark because my eyes are closed. But I hear the sounds. Cruel words about someone, disgusting words and names. And terrifying laughter... They think it's funny to degrade this person. My body feels heavy and weak. Still I hear them laughing and replaying all of the evil they have done... **** I woke up screaming and alone in Ethan's bed. I figured out where I was when he came crashing into the bedroom, eyeballs wide. I started crying the minute I saw him. The sobs just got louder when he sat on the bed and grabbed me. "It's okay—I've got you." He rocked me against his chest. Ethan was dressed and I was still
The glorious smell of coffee woke me up. I looked at my alarm clock and knew there would be no Waterloo Bridge run this morning. I came out to the kitchen with my arm over my eyes."Just how you like it, Bree, sweet and creamy." My sometime roommate and dear friend Gabrielle slid the mug in my direction, the expression on her face clearly readable. Start spilling the dish, sister, and I won't hurt you. I love Gaby, but this thing with Ethan had so derailed me I just wanted to bury the knowledge of its existence and pretend he'd never happened. I reached for the steaming mug and inhaled the delicious scent. It reminded me of him for some reason and I felt the bubble of emotion rise up strong. I sat down at the kitchen bar and crowded around my coffee mug like a mother hen protecting her chick. As I lowered onto the stool, the tenderness between my legs just served as another reminder. A reminder of Ethan and his hot body and model looks and the fabulous sex... and how I'd woken up in
The club scene in London is pretty damn awesome. We didn't do it often, but a good club crawl was just what I needed. My poor psyche was on maximum over- load in a conflict of emotions, fears and guilt I needed to dance and drink and laugh, but most of all I needed to forget about all the shit. Life was too short to dwell on the dark parts, or at least that's what my therapist said. I had an appointment with Dr. Roswell tomorrow at four o'clock and a dinner date with Ethan after. Our first step in the take-it-slow agreement we'd made on the phone. He'd told me he wanted to lay the cards out on the table, and I have to admit I liked that. The truth works best for me. I really don't have anything to hide; it was more being careful about what I wanted to share. And I didn't know how much I could share with Ethan either. There was no guide map to help me.I had to ride the wave and hope I didn't crash into the reef and drown. "Try this. It's magnificent." Benny handed me a tall orangey-re