Chapter 7 : Self Defense

*Genevieve*

Enough days had gone by that everything started feeling routine. I woke up before the sun rose to get my workout done, followed by breakfast, and then whatever the king and queen had on the schedule for the happy couple.

Rowan found himself in the gym in the early mornings more days than not. I was starting to look forward to seeing him there. I knew it was wrong, but as long as I didn't do anything more than appreciate the early morning banter, I assumed it was harmless.

Today, there was some sort of luncheon on the schedule. I was getting tired of the constant meals in front of what felt like hundreds of delegates. Today, at least, I was able to wear my regular uniform instead of a silly cocktail dress.

I had a gap in time between breakfast and escorting Aurora. She had taken to spending more and more time in her room, and she didn't need me for that. Instead, I stood outside her door and kept a watchful eye.

There had been a time a few years ago when I had stood in front of a very similar door. That door, though, had been at an estate in Monaco, guarding a delegate from Reyna's senate who was attempting to broker a deal with the manager of a casino there.

That senator had been equally as boring. I rarely missed my days doing high-stakes missions for the military operative team I'd been a part of prior to my position with the royal guard, but that had made me miss climbing walls and sneaking down hallways.

I'd once been face to face with an infamous drug lord, in a standoff that was literally life or death. He told me that he wasn't afraid to die, but he could tell that I was. I told him I wasn't afraid of anything, and pulled the trigger.

That was a lie. I was afraid of a lot of things. I worried that I would let someone down. I worried for my own life more times than I would like to consider. But my mentor, General Bradley Regan, had told me that bravery was being scared to death but doing it anyway. I kept those words close to my heart from then on.

Fear couldn't stop me. Sometimes it ran through my veins like venom, threatening to poison my every move, but I wouldn't let it control me. I'd spent so much of my childhood being afraid. I hadn't been that scared little girl in years though. I had vowed long ago to never be her again.

I pulled my attention back to the present, to the loud footsteps stomping down the hall. I turned to look at the source. It was a man in the royal guard uniform–a Boldovan man.

He was looking straight ahead, dark eyes staring down the long hallway. I wondered if he'd even seen me yet. A royal guard wasn't out of place here, and I didn't think much of it as he marched closer.

As he approached, he slowed his steps, head turning to study me. He was young, probably somewhere around my age. His face was handsome enough but plain. I didn't care for the way he regarded me though. He studied me hungrily, his eyes drinking me in with a strange look.

"I hear you're a captain," he said, stopping in front of me.

"Yep," I answered, popping the P on the end.

"I don't see a lot of women as captains these days."

"Well, I think that anyone who earns the position should get to hold it. I don't think that gender is a qualification," I dismissed.

"You've got to be pretty impressive to make it as a captain, even if you're a man," the guard continued.

"I think that's supposed to be a compliment. I appreciate the sentiment. I think you should probably get moving though," I suggested, uncomfortable with where I was guessing this was headed.

"I've got nowhere else to be, sweetheart," he retorted, lips curling into a foul smirk.

"I strongly doubt that. You should have something to do right now. If you're in uniform, you're on duty. I suggest you remember where your post is, guard." I didn't really have the authority to order him to do anything, but I wasn't going to stand here and have a conversation with him any longer.

"I just remembered, this is my post. Actually, my post is wherever you are," the man growled, placing a hand on the side of my face.

I slapped his hand away, grabbing him by the wrist and twisting his arm. "Find somewhere else to be now, or I'll make you sorry you ever turned your head this way," I snarled.

He yanked free of my grasp. The man curled his lip in a lupine snarl, and I felt a familiar jolt of adrenaline. He pulled a fist back, firing off a punch aimed at my gut.

"Ungrateful bitch," he snapped as he attempted to hit me.

I parried his punch, landing a kick to his chest. He stumbled backward, eyes wide in surprise. He lunged at me again, but I dodged out of his way in an instant. His head crashed into the stone wall behind me, and he slumped to the floor.

Cautiously stepping toward him, I nudged him with the toe of my boot. I didn't want the poor man unconscious, I just wanted him to go away. He groaned and rolled onto his back before clambering back to his feet.

"I'd recommend you find that post now, guard," I suggested.

He said nothing, just hurried down the hall rubbing at the top of his head.

"Impressive. I guess I should add practicing hand-to-hand combat into my workout routine now," Rowan said as he strolled down the hall.

Shit.

I hadn't realized I had an audience of any kind. The tone of his voice was unreadable, and I prayed he wasn't upset. I really shouldn't be fighting with his men, it sent a bad message. We were supposed to be a unified force, but instead, I was giving concussions to passing guards. It probably wouldn't matter that he had tried to hit me first. I was used to getting in trouble for the actions of other men. It came with the territory.

"My apologies, Prince. I guess I got carried away," I said, dipping my head in a half-hearted bow.

"Again with the prince thing. I swear, you don't have to call me that. I wish you wouldn't," Rowan chuckled, coming closer.

"My apologies, Rowan," I repeated. My heart thudded in my chest.

If he was upset with me for fighting with his guard, he had the choice to send me back to Reyna. It would be shameful, and I would probably lose my position within the royal guard. Obviously, I'd no longer be the captain of Aurora's guard, and I would probably never get the chance to captain another squadron again.

I hated to grovel, but I couldn't stand the thought of dishonoring my country and losing any further opportunity to advance myself. If I had to kneel at his feet and beg for forgiveness, I would do it.

"Apologies for what, Genevieve?" He extended a hand, using his index finger to tip my chin up, forcing me to meet his gaze.

"I shouldn't be assaulting members of your guard. My apologies for my indiscretion." My eyes dropped again.

Rowan's hand fell away. He chuckled, the sound sending shivers down my spine. I wasn't sure if it was desire, relief, or fear still, but I was thankful he didn't seem too upset about the situation.

"Bart has been looking for a fight for months. I'm shocked to see he picked it with you, but I'm impressed by your combat skills. I should be even more thankful you're the one in charge of my fiancée's safety. You seem more than capable," Rowan commended.

"Thank you. The training helps."

I forced myself to regain composure. I wouldn't let whatever overwhelming feelings were coursing through me show. His touch had been electric, and I found myself longing for more of it. My knees were practically weak with relief that he hadn't been angry with me. I straightened, rolling my shoulders back. I allowed myself to look at his handsome face.

"I'm sure it does," he answered. "Remind me to call you the next time someone needs to be put in their place."

"I don't think I want to be known as the palace bruiser." I hadn't had enough time to develop a reputation yet, I didn't want one made for me. If someone assigned me a reputation as a hard ass and a combative woman, it would only make my life here harder.

"Fine. But word will get around. For what it's worth, I thought it was kind of hot." Rowan shrugged.

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind. Much like how you should be keeping your fiancée in mind," I reminded him.

"Have you ever been to an art museum before?"

"Odd change of subject, but yes," I answered with a frown.

"The thing about an art museum is that the entire idea is 'look, don't touch.' You go purely for the purpose of enjoying the art. You're my art museum, Genevieve," he said, voice lowering so that even if there were someone else nearby, they'd never be able to hear him.

"Generous, but inappropriate," I warned him.

"That's the fine line I'm always walking. I'm most comfortable there," he chuckled, sticking his hands in his pockets.

"I'll keep that in mind," I shot back, unsure of what else to say.

He only nodded and continued down the hall. After he was a few feet away, he started whistling. I didn't recognize the song, but it was a pleasant sound.

Just like everything else about Rowan. Unfamiliar, but pleasant.

I decided that Aurora didn't need a guard in front of her door after all. Hurrying back to my room, I let the door slam behind me. I studied my reflection in the mirror, making sure that everything was still in place after my scuffle. I smoothed a hand over my hair, ensuring that every strand was in place.

I had to get my head on straight. Rowan was only revealing himself more and more to be a careless playboy. Just because he set his sights on me as a plaything didn't make him any less despicable. As a matter of fact, the brazen nature of hitting on the guard for his own fiancée made him more despicable. I reminded myself of that. If he were with me, he'd be no more faithful.

Still, he was the sort of handsome that almost made you sick to your stomach. I couldn't think straight around him. Every morning in the gym, we were more and more friendly, and I didn't even need an alarm anymore to wake up in time to get down there. I looked forward to it too much.

A more disciplined soldier would stop going to the gym in the morning and choose a different time so as to avoid him. I couldn't do it though. I craved his attention. I needed the banter each morning as we exercised. I couldn't fight it any longer.

I would allow myself only that much though. The longer time went on, the more I found myself longing for him, but I refused to let things go any further. We would work out together in the mornings, and I would do my duty during the day, and I would keep from doing anything stupid.

The fact that I believed that could work at all was foolish. I was stupid for even entertaining the thought, but I couldn't deny myself. I spent so much of my life trying to be disciplined, and worked so hard to do everything I was supposed to in order to get where I was.

I wondered how much longer I could maintain my self-control.