Chapter 9

#Chapter 9

Warren

Every part of me resents this conversation, but unfortunately, I have no other person to talk to about her. No other person I trust.

"I just wanted to talk. I didn't know she'd be so opposed to the invitation."

Connor chugs his beer and then looks at me. "Let me ask you this first. Are we talking about your Evelyn?"

A frown line appears between my eyebrows. "She's not mine but yes, we're talking about the very, one and only, Evelyn. How many Evelyns have I mentioned to you, idiot?"

"I just wanted to confirm as you seem to forget that you deeply hurt her and broke her heart. The very girl you claimed to have feelings for." The knife in my heart twists and a new round of pain starts to hurt me." And now that you saw her after ten fucking years, you jumped to dinner in a few sentences? Are you insane? No wonder she hit you. You should be glad it wasn't her purse. That shit is equal to a suitcase. You wouldn't have a jaw right now if she attacked you with it."

Scowling at him I stay silent because once again I screwed up.

"Hey," Connor nudges my elbow to draw my attention. "Are you okay?" I only nod because words seem to weigh too heavy on my tongue.

Of course, I'm not fucking okay. How could I be when the woman I love doesn't even want to see me let alone have a conversation with me. Not that I expected any less. But still, the truth fucking hurts.

"You're not okay," Connor states and rounds the island as he orders pizza.

I'm not even hungry. The sight of Evelyn caused my appetite to vanish.

"Warren, I'm gonna ask you one simple question." I get rid of the ice pack.

"I'm tired. Let's talk on the couch." Loosening my tie, I untangle it from around my neck and then unbutton the top two buttons of my dress shirt. I roll my sleeves next and lean back as I take a deep breath .

After years of wishing, I finally got to see Evelyn and talk to her. It wasn't pleasant from any angle but at least I got to know she's happy and okay.

"Do you want Evelyn back?"

Smiling at him I slowly close my eyes. "Does it even matter Connor? She doesn't want me back. And I respect her decision."

Connor groans and slumps onto the couch, the furniture croaking loudly beneath him. I'm sure he did that on purpose. I have no clue how this dickhead and I are best friends.

"Girls don't want a lot of things. But if men go along with whatever they say, trust me there won't be any couples Warren. Girls say something and mean something else."

"Trust me she meant it when she said she wants me far away from her."

"And you're gonna just do that? Not fight for her at all?" I'd do anything for her.

"I don't know. I miss her a lot though." I put the good side of my jaw against the back of the couch and look over at Connor who's watching me with a pensive face.

"Then try to get her back. It's been a decade, Ren. For years you've been living in this hell you've made for yourself. You said that you'd reach out when you'd feel like you deserve her. Where's that spirit now?"

"The spirit was gone as soon as I saw her happy without me. And she doesn't deserve someone like me. She deserves better. I'm just the guy who broke her heart. Hurt her so much that when I stared at her today I could see the traces of the damage I had caused to her. Do you even know how that makes me feel? I feel like a monster who hurt an angel."

Connor doesn't utter a word and for a second I'm left with my dread and accusing thoughts.

"It doesn't have to be that way, Ren. Yes, you broke her heart but you can also be the one who mends it. After all, this is your mess. You need to fix it."

I chuckle at his reply. "My mess... she isn't a mess. She looked so strong, beautiful, and happy tonight before she saw me. She's complete without me Connor. She doesn't need any fixing."

"What's on the inside cannot be seen on the outside. So stop acting like you know what she's feeling."

"Evelyn shed a few tears but that was it. Nothing else. There was more rage than calm. Like... she wanted to hurt me more. I'm pretty sure she was about to hit me again, but Tristan stopped her. I hate that he touched her at all."

"Don't blame the girl. If you had hurt me, I'd do the same, Ren. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't want you to try and ask for my forgiveness. I still think you should try. "

"No, I won't. She's done with me. But more than that she looks happy Connor. I wouldn't want to risk her happiness. She looks breathtaking when she's happy."

The moment of her wrapped up in her world as she ate her ice cream is imprinted in my mind. I can live forever with that image burned into my memory.

Even though my heart wants more, I know I can't let my darkness take that away from her. I have done it before. I'd be damned if I let it happen again.

"Man you're so whipped for that woman." I smile through the sadness. There is no doubt that I am.

"You'll understand when you fall in love." Connor laughs mirthfully.

"Love isn't in my cards. But sex is. Lots of sex." I shake my head.

"Whatever suits you."

The elevator pings and Connor is on his feet like the penthouse has suddenly caught fire.

Using my credit card he pays the bill and then hands it back to me. I glare at him but he ignores me completely. The bastard earns six figures, yet he always pays for food using my money.

"So since Evelyn isn't gonna be in the picture anymore, why don't we hit a club or bar and I hook you up with some hot girl? If you're not going to move toward her then you need to change your direction."

The mere thought of some female stranger touching my body and kissing my lips—all that's reserved for someone else makes me wanna puke. I can't even imagine it let alone actually do it.

"Fuck no! I'm not hitting up a place full of women. I'm good."

"With a sex history as dry as sandpaper."

"I don't want sex."

"What about fucking?" I shoot him a pointed look and take a slice of pizza.

"Not interested in that either." Connor sighs loudly.

"Fine, no hooking up. What about some drinks at a bar and enjoying the view?" I almost gag at the suggestion.

"I'm not watching the view. I have work piled up that I need to sort through." Connor groans.

"Oh c'mon. I don't have any other best friends. You have to tag along with me. I promise I'll be on my best behavior."

"You lose your mind after two shots," I grumble and take another slice.

"Seriously! What's wrong with being a lightweight?" I smile.

"Nothing. I'll stop by for five minutes to hang out and pick up your ass."

"I don't want your hands on my ass. But if you want that I can ask a girl. Trust me, all the women would be down to having a one-night stand with you."

"Too bad I'm unavailable for a long time." Connor shuts up after that. Definitely tired of my comebacks. But I know no matter when or where I need someone, he'd be there to save the day. 't ask for anything else.