LOGINI closed my eyes and felt tears burning behind my eyelids.
This is my life now. The thought settled over me like a shroud. This beautiful prison. This is perfect hell. And somewhere in the darkest part of my mind, a voice whispered: How much longer can you survive it? The elevator ascended in suffocating silence. Thirty-five floors of polished metal and quiet judgement, my phone still clutched in Alexander's hand like evidence at a crime scene. I counted floors. I tried to breathe. Failed. The doors opened directly into our penthouse—three thousand square feet of minimalist perfection that had never felt like home. Alexander walked inside without looking at me, my phone still gripped in his hand, his silence more terrifying than any words. I followed, closing the door softly behind me. My feet screamed in the Louboutins. I slipped them off immediately and felt the plush carpet beneath my aching soles. Small mercy. Alexander disappeared into his study without a word. Maybe he'd let it go. Maybe he'd had his say in the car, checked my phone, and found nothing because there was nothing to find. Maybe tonight I'll go to sleep. I knew better, but hope was a stubborn, stupid thing. I changed in our bedroom, peeling off the emerald silk dress that suddenly felt like a costume. Hung it carefully in the closet where it belonged, alongside all the other dresses he'd chosen for me. Pulled on soft pyjamas—grey cotton, modest, nothing that could be construed as provocative or suggestive or any of the thousand other things that might set him off. I washed my face. Brushed my teeth. I braided my hair. All the rituals of normalcy. When I emerged, Alexander stood in the living room doorway. My laptop in his hands. My stomach dropped. "I want to see your emails," he said calmly. Too calmly. "You just checked my phone—" "Your work emails, Elena." His voice was patient, like he was explaining something to a slow child. "I want to see your work correspondence." "I don't have work emails anymore." The words tasted bitter. "You had me quit, remember?" His face darkened. Storm clouds gathering. "Are you blaming me for that? I gave you a choice—" "You threatened to have my boss fire me if I didn't resign." The words came out before I could stop them. Truth, sharp and dangerous. Silence. Heavy. Suffocating. Then: "Because that place was full of men who wanted to fuck you. I was protecting you." Protecting. He always called it protecting. He opened my laptop anyway, sat on the couch, and began scrolling. I stood in the doorway, arms wrapped around myself, suddenly cold despite the apartment's perfect climate control. I watched him hunt. Browser history. Documents. Photos. Searching for evidence of sins I hadn't committed. "Who's Thomas Brennan?" he asked suddenly. My mind raced. Thomas Brennan. Thomas... "The gallery owner. Morrison Gallery. I'm on their mailing list." "This email says there's an opening reception next week." He turned the screen toward me, showing me the innocuous gallery newsletter I'd forgotten existed. "Were you planning to go?" "No. I just never unsubscribed—" "Without telling me? You were going to sneak out and see another man?" "Alexander, it's a mass email. They send it to hundreds of people—" "That's not what I asked." His voice was ice. "Were you planning to go see Thomas Brennan?" "No! I wasn't planning anything. I didn't even read the email." "But you got it. You're still on his mailing list. Still maintaining contact with your old life. With men from your past." "It's an automated email list—" "Unsubscribe. Now." He handed me the laptop. I stood there, holding it, fingers hovering over the keyboard. This was insane. This was a gallery newsletter. But I clicked unsubscribe, watched the confirmation message appear, and handed the laptop back. "Better," he said, still scrolling. "What else are you hiding?" "Nothing. Alexander, there's nothing—" "Then you won't mind if I look." He pulled up our phone records. I didn't even know he had access to those. Apparently, he'd always had access. Another thing I hadn't known, another way he'd been watching. "You called your mother three times this week," he said, scanning the list of numbers. "She's my mother. Is that a crime?" "What do you talk about?" "Normal things." I was so tired. Bone-tired. Soul-tired. "Family things." "What kind of family things?" He looked up at me, his eyes cold and calculating. "Are you complaining about me? Telling her lies about our marriage?" "No, Alexander. We talked about her garden. Her book club. Recipes. Normal mother-daughter things." "I want to be on speaker next time you call her." I stared at him. "You're joking." His face was stone. "Do I look like I'm joking?" "You want to monitor my calls with my mother?" "I want transparency in our marriage. If you're not hiding anything, it shouldn't be a problem." There it was again. That logic. If you're innocent, you have nothing to fear. If you object, you must be guilty. "Fine," I said, because what else could I say? "Good." He set the laptop aside, and leaned back on the couch. "Sit down. We need to talk about tonight." I glanced at the clock. One thirty in the morning. "Alexander, can we do this tomorrow? I'm exhausted—" "Oh, YOU'RE exhausted?" His voice rose slightly, the first crack in his careful control. "I'm the one who has to deal with a wife who can't be trusted. I'm the one who has to worry every time we go out in public. But sure, you're tired. How inconsiderate of me." I sat. What choice did I have? "Tell me about David Chen," he said. "I already told you—" "Tell me again. When did you work with him?" "Five years ago. Before we met. He was an intern—" "An intern you supervised?" "Technically, yes, but—" "So you had power over him. Authority." I didn't like where this was going. "It wasn't like that—" "Did he have a crush on you?" "What? No. He was twenty-two and—" "Did he ever ask you out?" "No, Alexander—" "Are you sure? Because you laughed pretty hard at his jokes tonight. Like you have history." "We have work history. That's all." "Work history." He repeated the words slowly, tasting them for lies. "And in all that work history, nothing ever happened? He never made a move? You never encouraged him?" "No. Nothing happened. Ever." "Then why did you look so happy to see him?" "Because—" I stopped. There was no right answer. If I said I was happy to see an old colleague, it proved I'd been thinking about him. If I said I wasn't happy, I was lying because he'd seen my face. "Because it was nice to see someone from my old life. That's all." "Your old life." His laugh was bitter. "The life before me. The life you wish you still had." "That's not what I meant—" "Then what did you mean, Elena? Explain it to me." Two AM became three AM. The questions circled, repeated, and evolved. Same accusations in different words. I answered until my voice went hoarse. He followed me when I went to the bathroom. Waited outside the door. Continued talking through the wood. I changed into pyjamas in the closet, hoping for a moment of privacy. He opened the door midway through. "Are you hiding from me now?" "No, I was just—" "Just what? Avoiding this conversation? Avoiding taking responsibility for your behaviour?" Three AM became four AM. I climbed into bed, hoping it would end. He sat on the edge, still talking. Every time I closed my eyes, his voice cut through the darkness. "Are you listening to me?" "Yes." "Then answer the question." "What question?" "See? You're not even paying attention. This is exactly what I'm talking about. You don't respect me. You don't respect our marriage." "Alexander, please. I'm so tired I can't think straight—" "Maybe that's the problem. Maybe you think too much. Overthink things. Create narratives where you're the victim and I'm the villain." I said nothing. I kept my eyes closed. Prayed for sleep. For silence. For anything. Finally, sometime after four, his breathing evened out. He'd fallen asleep mid-sentence, exhaustion finally claiming him. I lay perfectly still, afraid to move, afraid to wake him, afraid of starting it all over again. My phone buzzed on the nightstand. Sarah. "Are you okay? You looked scared tonight."Because this wasn't just about me anymore.This was about the tiny life depending on me for everything.And I would not fail her.Not this time.Not ever.The legal assault was relentless.Every day brought new motions, new demands, and new threats. Alexander's lawyers filed for psychiatric evaluations—three different doctors, all of their choosing. Demanded I attend couples counselling despite the restraining order. Painted me as irrational, vindictive, and a danger to my unborn child.I was drowning in paperwork, in legal jargon, in the slow crushing weight of the system designed to protect people like Alexander.Twenty weeks pregnant now. Halfway.I'd gone to my anatomy scan alone, lying on the table while the technician moved the ultrasound wand across my belly. Rosa had offered to come, but I'd needed to do this myself. Needed one moment with my daughter that wasn't tainted by fear and legal battles."Would you like to know the sex?" the technician asked."Yes. Please.""It's a g
Ice flooded through my veins.He knew.He knew about the baby.How? Had he seen medical bills?Tracked doctor's appointments? Have you gone through my things before I left?My phone rang again. Same number.I answered without thinking. "How did you know?""Did you really think you could hide it from me?" His voice was cold now, all pretence of pleading gone. "I'm not stupid, Elena. The morning sickness. The baggy clothes. The sudden need to 'escape’. You're pregnant with my child.""You have no right—""I have every right. That's my baby. And you will not keep my child from me.""The restraining order—""It won't matter when I prove you're an unfit mother. Unstable. Delusional.Running away while pregnant, making false accusations. What judge will give you custody when I can prove you're mentally ill?"My breath came in short gasps. Panic attack. I was having a panic attack."You're a monster," I whispered."No, Elena. I'm a father protecting his child from a mentally unstable woman.
The words hung in the air between us, impossible to take back.His face transformed. Something dark and terrible crossed his features, something that made every instinct scream at me to run."You're not leaving me," he said quietly."Ever. Do you understand? You're my wife. You belong to me.""I don't belong to anyone—"He moved so fast I didn't have time to react. His hand locked around my wrist, tight, bruising."You're not going anywhere," he said."We're going to sit down, and you're going to tell me exactly what you've been planning. And then we're going to fix this. Together."I looked at his hand on my wrist, at his face—cold and certain and completely in control.And I realised: I couldn't do this carefully anymore. I couldn't wait for the perfect moment; couldn't plan every detail.I needed to leave. Tonight.Before this got worse.Before he took even more than he already had.Before there was nothing left of me to save.Alexander left for San Francisco at six AM. Business tr
"Bathroom. I had to pee."He looked past me, into the bathroom, like he'd find evidence of something. What did he think? That I had a lover hiding in the shower? That I was secretly calling someone? That I was—His eyes fell on the toilet. On the faint smell of vomit still lingering despite the flush."Were you sick again?""No. I told you, I just had to—""Don't lie to me." He stepped closer, and I instinctively stepped back. "I can smell it. You were throwing up.""It's nothing. Just a stomach bug—""For three weeks? That's not a stomach bug, Elena." His eyes narrowed, something dangerous sparking in them. "What aren't you telling me?"Everything. I wasn't telling him everything."I'm tired," I said, trying to move past him. "Can we talk about this in the morning?"His hand caught my arm. Not hard enough to hurt, but firm enough to stop me."Come back to bed." It wasn't a request.I followed him back to the bedroom. Climbed under the covers. Felt his arm settle across my waist, heav
Alexander could not know. Not yet. Not until I figured out what to do. Not until I had a plan.A baby changed everything. This child—this tiny cluster of cells currently dividing inside me—needed protection. Needed safety.Needed a mother who was strong enough to give it what I hadn't been able to give myself.I wrapped the test in paper towels and buried it deep in the trash can. Washed my hands. Looked at myself in the mirror.I looked the same. But everything was different now.I drove home in a daze, my mind spinning through impossible scenarios. How long could I hide this? What would happen when he found out? Could I leave before then?The penthouse loomed above me, glass and steel and wealth. I took the elevator up, each floor a countdown to confrontation.Alexander was waiting in the living room when I walked in. Arms crossed. Face unreadable."You're late.""Traffic on I-5. There was an accident—""Show me your receipt."My heart stopped. "What?""From the doctor. Show me the
I stared at the message in the darkness, Alexander's breathing steady beside me. I wanted to type back. I wanted to scream into the phone that no, I wasn't okay; I hadn't been okay in so long I'd forgotten what okay felt like.My fingers moved. "I'm fine. Just tired."I looked at the words. Deleted them.Typed: "All good!"Deleted that too.The cursor blinked. Waiting. Judging.I set the phone down without sending anything.Alexander would check it in the morning. He always checked. And anything I said to Sarah would be used against me, twisted into evidence of my disloyalty, proof that I was turning my friends against him.I closed my eyes.Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. My annual checkup was scheduled months ago, before everything had gotten quite this bad. One hour in a doctor's office. One hour where Alexander couldn't follow me, couldn't monitor me, couldn't—Unless he insisted on coming.The thought made my chest tighten. Would he insist? Would he find a reason why I ne







