Chapter 4

"What happens at midnight tomorrow night?"

Ryan gripped my shoulders tightly. For the first time, his voice trembled.

"Erin, don't do anything stupid. If you even think about hurting yourself, I'll—"

"You'll what?"

He opened his mouth, his expression turning frighteningly grim.

He didn't sleep a wink that night.

He dragged a chair over and kept watch outside the bedroom door, as if he were truly afraid I'd vanish into thin air with Nora.

By morning, his eyes were bloodshot.

The first thing he did was return the car keys, restore our access to the main-house garage, and lift the order he'd given the guards the night before.

"I'm sorry."

Ryan stood in front of me, his voice hoarse. "I shouldn't have tried to keep you from leaving last night. That's not what a mate does, and it's definitely not what an Alpha should do to his own family."

He paused.

"Can we celebrate the autumn full moon all over again? Please?"

It really seemed like he wanted to put everything back the way it was.

He made a mess in the kitchen, but he remembered exactly how I liked my steak cooked and that Nora couldn't have nuts.

That afternoon, he continued helping Nora glue together the little paper lantern they'd left unfinished two nights earlier.

Glue got all over their hands, and Nora laughed so hard she wriggled in his arms.

For a moment, I could almost see the three happiest years we'd ever had.

At dinner, Ryan brought out the antique necklace again.

"Erin, give me one more chance.

"From now on, every full moon, every holiday, I'll be home. If something comes up with the territory, I'll have someone else handle it."

Nora hugged his neck and asked in a small voice, "Daddy, you won't make us wait anymore?"

Ryan kissed her, his eyes red. "No. Not even once."

The clock on the wall said eleven.

Only one hour left.

The System's screen appeared in front of my eyes.

The option to cancel my return was right there at the top.

My hand hovered for a long time.

If I canceled, I'd lose this chance for good. And if I ever wanted to leave later, I'd have to pay an even steeper price.

But as I watched Nora lean against Ryan, I still wavered.

Right then, Ryan's phone rang.

He glanced at it and hung up.

But it kept ringing again and again.

Finally, he answered.

Claire's voice carried through the phone.

"Ryan, I'm at the old North River bridge.

"I'm leaving Northridge tonight. I've already submitted a request to the Elder Council to leave the pack. Whether I become a lone wolf or move to another city, I won't be in your way anymore.

"Before I go, I just want to see you one last time."

Ryan hung up and immediately looked at me. "I'm not going."

I didn't say anything. I just closed the System's screen without hitting cancel.

Ten minutes later, he started fidgeting.

His eyes kept going back to his phone.

In the end, he stood up and grabbed his jacket.

"Erin, I'll only be gone 20 minutes."

I laughed.

"The old North River bridge is at the edge of the territory. You have a patrol. You have other officers. You know where she lives. Why can't you send someone else?"

"She doesn't trust anyone else right now. She'll only see me."

"So what?"

Ryan pinched the bridge of his nose, exhausted. "If she really goes lone wolf and cuts through the abandoned forest up north, she'll pass right through hunter territory. She's one of Northridge's own. I can't just ignore it when I know she could get hurt."

"You're the Alpha. You're not her personal rescue team."

He was quiet for a moment. Then he started putting on his shoes anyway.

"I already promised to set clear boundaries with her. This is just to make sure she's safe one last time.

"Erin, why can't you let her leave with even a little dignity?"

I slowly lowered the hand I'd raised to block the door.

So even at the very end, he still thought Claire was the one who needed understanding.

As if afraid I'd change my mind, Ryan held out his phone for me to see.

"I'll share my live location and keep the line open. Twenty minutes. I promise I'll be back."

He ran out the door.

I sat at the dining table, listening to the wind and traffic on the other end of the line.

When Ryan reached the old bridge, Claire asked, "If you love her so much, why do you come every time I call?"

The line went silent.

It stayed silent so long that I thought the call had dropped.

Finally, Ryan spoke, his voice hoarse. "Because I'm greedy.

"I can't bear to give up my family or the way you remind me of who I used to be.

"When I'm with you, I don't have to be Alpha. I don't have to be a father. I don't have to be right all the time. I feel young again, free, like I could drop everything and go wild whenever I want."

Claire asked, "Then could you bear to give her up?"

Ryan didn't answer right away.

At 11:58, the phone died.

The call cut off.

Nora hugged the little paper lantern that still wasn't fully glued together and looked up at me. "Mommy, are we ever coming back to find Daddy?"

I held her tight.

"No, Nora. We're not."

[Countdown complete.]

[Return sequence initiated.]

A second before the white light swallowed us both, I thought I heard the lock turn.

Ryan's voice came from the entryway.

"Erin, I'm home—"