2 months later
My life was not any less fucked up. As always, luck was nowhere to be found. I know everyone says those who work hard don't need luck, but that's bullshit. What are you going to say when you are left behind just because of one shit or when, while giving an exam, you fail a subject by one mark? It sucks. Luck rules everything. I thought I would get a job at a prestigious school as a teacher, but out of 10, nine got selected, and I got left out. Wow, my life. I salute my life for that. It always found a way to show me how pathetic I was.
My parents started to talk about my marriage, but I couldn't bring myself to tell them I didn't want to, because I knew even if I said I didn't want to, it wouldn't matter. They would force me anyway, and if the devil knew I was getting married, he would definitely come for me, but the weird thing is, it's been 2 months, and he's nowhere to be seen. Maybe he forgot about our marriage. It's better if he forgets. I can live in peace.
"Yeah, peace with your parents around you," The girl inside me said, rolling her eyes.
I went home to find a car parked outside the house, and deep down, I knew whose car it was. It had been two months with no contact, and suddenly, ugh. I didn't want to go inside; instead, the thought of going somewhere else came to mind so I didn't have to face him, but I could be wrong. Anyone could have the same car as him, so I went inside, and there he was talking with my parents. I mentally hated myself for walking inside.
There were two more people I had never seen before, a woman and a man. That man was wearing a Dhaka topi. I stood at the door and thought of leaving, but that bastard immediately looked at me as if he knew I was coming right then. I was about to say hello, but I concluded that I should do Namaskar. They looked like a traditional type of person. I assumed they must be his parents. He smiled at me, but ignoring him, I went to my room.
I freshened up, and many thoughts came to mind. Why was he here? Did he tell my parents about our deal? Ugh, they're going to kill me. Mom told me to come outside for some time. I didn't bother to step outside, and she called me again, so I went out, not willingly, and sat on the couch.
I knew he was looking at me, but I ignored him. My parents told me why they were there. I thought he would show them the papers and tell them everything, but he didn't. Did he come to ask for my hand? After two months, really? He cleared his throat, and I looked at him.
"Do you say yes to the proposal?" My mom eyed me, wanting me to say yes, but I remained silent.
"If you don't mind, I want to talk to her ....a-h-h alone," he asked my parents in a hesitant tone.
"Drama devil," I thought.
Yeah, sure, sure," my dad replied.
I gave him a look and went to my room. He followed me. I walked inside the room, not bothering to look at him, and He closed the door. He stood watching my every move but didn't say a word. Getting tired of his presence, I looked at him and crossed my arms.
"Why are you doing this?" I asked annoyed by his presence.
"I think you know why," he said in a low voice, not removing his eyes from me.
"No, I don't. Care to explain?" I glared at him.
He stayed quiet, looking at me, then slowly came towards me and whispered.
"I came back to take what's mine." He said it with a smirk on his face, and my hands fell down.
Mine? Is he fucking serious?
This got me angry, and I slightly pushed him.
"I don't belong to you." I almost shouted.
"I guess now you remember about our deal," he smiled, and I rolled my eyes.
"I am not some type of thing or object you came here to claim," I said, throwing daggers at him. It took everything in me to not hit him.
"Say yes, or I will have to force myself to take you without your permission."
"And how are you going to do that?" I crossed my arms.
He smiled and said, "I think you forgot about our marriage papers."
"Get out!" I snarled.
He looked at me for some time, muttered something under his breath, and left.
I was so angry with myself. If I hadn't tried to kill myself that day this would have never happened. I am such a foolish bitch. I have always done things to ruin my life. I went outside and said yes. My parents were more than thrilled, but Prarthi looked at me with question-filled eyes. She had just come shopping, and she knew how much I despise relationships.
Both of our parents went outside. My sister went to her room, shaking her head, not believing what I said. Before going outside, he looked at me and winked. How dare he? I mouthed fuck you, but instead of leaving, he came toward me and whispered.
"Whenever and wherever you want." I balled my hands into a fist. It took everything in me not to kill him. I stood there glaring at him, and he left.
After they left, I went towards the balcony and got lost in my thoughts. I didn't notice when Prarthi came and stood beside me.
"Are you sure you are happy?" Prarthi asked.
"Yes, I am," I answered, not turning to look at her.
She eyed me, not believing my words: "Why do I feel like something is wrong?"
Everything is wrong
I stood silent.
"Look at me," she demanded.
I calmly looked at her and shook my head. "Nope, nothing is wrong. You always wanted to see how my marriage looked, and now it's happening." I looked at her, trying to smile but failing.
"I can't believe this," she said, shaking her head.
"Look, I am happy, ok? Finally, I did something to make our parents happy,"
"But they are not going to spend the rest of their lives with him. Anything you do, they will never be fully happy, and we both know that."
She was right. Whatever I do, they will never be satisfied and happy, but maybe for some time, I can make them happy.
"I know," I whispered, "But this is what I want. He seems nice, and if I don't marry him, they will force me to marry someone else. It's better If I choose my life partner now."
"Hmmm. You are right. If you want this, then OK with me," she said, hugging me.
One of the reasons I was alive was because of my sister. She was always supportive, and she loved me. She always stood up for me, even if she had to go against my parents. I never told her about him, how I got married, or how I tried to kill myself. I couldn't; it could have hurt her.
Now that I have said yes, I have to live with him after getting married in front of everyone. I don't want to, but I don't have any choice. I couldn't let my parents know that I was already married without their knowledge. They would have killed me, but maybe not. As greedy and selfish as they were with me, I doubt they would have been angry. He was rich, and they would perhaps have forgiven me if I had told them I was already married to him.
I don't know what is there for me tomorrow. I mean, of course, our engagement is tomorrow. He wants everything to happen fast and in a private ceremony. Who is he, and what does he want from me?
The next day, we got engaged in a private ceremony. My parents wanted to make it big because they wanted everyone to know they had a billionaire son-in-law, but thankfully, the devil wanted it to be private. They couldn't say no to him. My parents were quite annoyed at his decision because they couldn't show off everything. My mother whined the whole time during the engagement. When I was coming out of my room for the ceremony, I heard her say "We could book a venue in a second and arrange the engagement ceremony," She said with disappointment in her voice. "But no, he wants it to be private. Billionaire with no brain. If you have money, you have to show it off." For me, it was a relief. I didn't like people's ugly stares and talks. Their suggestions about what I should do and what I shouldn't. I also got to know that his name was Amol. Whatever his name was, he was always going to remain the devil for me. My dad wasn't happy either. He wanted to have a grand wedding for me, so he w
I shrugged and started to walk out, but he put out his arm and blocked my way. "Where the hell do you think you are going?" He almost whispered. He was looking straight. I could feel a slight anger in his voice. I rolled my eyes. He slowly focused his eyes on me, waiting for me to talk. "Guest room," I answered. "I guess we don't need to pretend to be married when there are only two of us in this house, right?" He clenched his jaw, dropped his arm, and came closer to me. "You are staying in the same room as me," he said in a low voice, placing his mouth near my ear. "You don't owe me. It was just a deal. Deal to get married, not to be your wife," I almost shouted at him, taking two steps back. "Whatever, you are not leaving," he said, looking behind me. I knew he was angry, but I didn't care. "Oh, so you are going to stop me? How will you do that?" I asked, daring him to stop me. He came closer, narrowing his eyes. He slid his arm around my waist, and pulled me close to him, t
That night I couldn't sleep well. I was angry with everything that was going on. Nothing was in my control. I wanted to be out of here but now I was married and leaving marriage wasn't so easy. You could be stuck in it for life. Life? Can you believe it? I have to spend the rest of my life with this devil. Shit. How did I end up here? The next day, I stayed in the room, watching movies to get my mind off everything. I was trying to not think about him but he was all that was in my head. "I hate him. I hate him," I told myself time and again. "I am never going to accept him or this marriage," I almost screamed. Thanks to Tina lunch and snacks were brought for me into the room. For dinner, I told Tina I would come to the kitchen and serve myself. She didn't have to wait for me as I wasn't hungry. She at first insisted on bringing dinner for me but I refused. I didn't want to see that bloody devil's face. He ruined everything. That bastard. It was already evening and I don't know
I was in the garden when I got a call from my sister. She told me they were expecting us tomorrow for Dar. Hell, I didn't even know Teej was already here which was the day after tomorrow. I have no new Sari. They would expect me to wear a Sari. I don't want to and I only have the two saris I wore on our wedding day. My parents will find a way to taunt me again. (Teej is a festival where Nepali women celebrate by keeping fast for the long age of their husband or young girls keep fast to get a nice husband. Some even keep fast without drinking water.) I went inside and Rima was there with the devil, talking. My blood started to boil looking at him. Every time I saw him I wanted to start a fight. He gets on my nerves just for existing. I was about to go towards my room when Rima called me. "Hey," she waved. I stopped and turned to look at her. Devil's eyes were also on me. Our eyes met but I focused my attention on Rima. She walked towards me and then what shocked me was she pulled me
The next morning, I was all alone in bed. I don't know why but I didn't like it. Today, we were going to my parent's house so I got dressed. Dar was at night but prarthi told me to come early. I stood at the window admiring the day and waiting for him but as I looked down he was on the bench reading newspaper. Was he not going with me? Maybe he doesn't want to go? Why would he? He doesn't owe me anything but they want to see him more than me. That's why they called us early. My legs took me to the garden. I stood staring at his back, thinking if I should go near him or not. He kept the newspaper and looked straight. What if he says he doesn't want to go? What am I gonna say to my sister? My parents will taunt me the whole day for not being able to bring him. No, I will beg him to go with me. If he doesn't go with me then they will eat my brain and make it impossible for me to live. I slowly went and sat on the bench. Five minutes went by and neither he said a word nor did I. Tina bro
I went straight to take a shower to cool my mind. I sat in the shower feeling bad about everything. My energy was totally drained. I shouldn't have gone there but if I had not, they would have come here or called the devil to visit them. Anyhow they would have made me go there. The water running out of the shower washed all the bad energy out of my body. My tears didn't stop and I wept my heart out. This never-ending pain was too much to bear. If it had come from a guy I would have left him, If it had come from a friend I would have ignored her or cut her out of my life but this was coming from my parents. What could I do instead of accepting it and letting it destroy me? You can't choose your family. You can only learn to live with it, live with them. Nearly an hour later I came out and got ready to sleep but there was no sign of him. I looked around and went to his office. He was not there. I came back and sat on the bed. "Where was he?" I got up and looked outside from the windo
The Shiva temple was half an hour far from where we lived. It was near the jungle and the devotees' crowd was huge and the line? oh, don't even ask about the line in the temple. It felt like the whole city's women were there and even males. We came back like maybe five hours after worshipping Shivaji. I was worn out. My legs were hurt and my feet were aching. We came inside and found out Rima had already left. I went straight to the room and got freshened up. I didn't like what I saw in the mirror. The girl in front of me was unrecognizable and remembered that I haven't thanked him. He entered the room and I could see he was exhausted too. He gave me a tired smile. "Thanks," I looked anywhere but him. I felt his eyes on me. He must be thinking why I was thanking him. "For this," I showed him the sari which I had taken off and placed on the couch. "And this too," I looked at the sari I was wearing. I was wearing another sari that I found in the closet. It was the same color, red tha
The next morning, after I prepared breakfast I went to the garden without having it. I wanted to have it with him and when I asked Tina to call him, she said he wasn't in his office. So, I decided to do some gardening. I was enjoying gardening when he came with breakfast. I looked at him and he smiled. "Let's eat," he said. His voice was soft and he seemed happy. I washed my hands and sat on the bench. We then ate in silence. "If you don't mind, I was thinking.. if...you know..i .... I want to take you out...." He whispered in nervousness, playing with his hand. I looked at him and laughed a little. Was he nervous? I just sat there looking at him and he frowned at his hands when I said nothing. "For... dinner," he hesitated. "I didn't mean to.....laugh," I apologized. Questions filled my mind. I mean he never asked me to go out before so why now? "Before? Girl, you have been married for what maybe 10 days?" I told myself. I was in my own thoughts while he was looking