FACING FEAR
May 19, 2021
FINN
I gently clutch the doorknob of the backdoor of their house. When I turned at my back I saw him with his eyes closed while continuously breathing in and out in a heavy and rapid motion. His panic attacks him earlier than I expected.
“I’m gonna open the door now.” I gave him a head start, he didn’t open his eyes instead he nodded vigorously.
I slowly turn the doorknob while not taking my eyes off him. I watch him tenses and his anxiety even gets worse when I finally open the door wide. The wind greets us as it blows our hair and embraces our body. I saw him jittered by the touch of it.
“F-Finn, I think I’m gonna have to go to the bathroo
A PLANMay 19, 2021ZACK“She killed herself. She drowned herself in this lake.” The second secret that I unveiled to Finn.It’s such a good burst of relief and it lessens the weight that I carry in my chest once I finally let out those things to someone. But the pain of my mother’s death and secrets will forever remain in my life.They said that when you get hurt you will never forget the pain that it caused you, but instead you’ll outgrow it, you’ll learn from it. But why is it different for me? Why do I always have to suffer in the same fucking pain and the same reason -- that she left me hanging filled with questions and agony?I felt my eyes sod as I reme
THE INTRUDERMay 19, 2021ZACK“What plan?” I almost dropped my whole body on the floor as a pile of cold water flushed through my skin when Jackie appeared on the front door, sucking a lollipop with one hand carrying a grocery bag.Then seconds passed, Gabby and Lizzie followed through and stumbled to Jackie and they began bickering. But I and Finn stayed shocked and silent… I really thought that it was my grandpa.“Hey, you two! Did you just see Debbie twerked, you look ugly pale.” Gabby started as he maneuvered his way through the kitchen, not minding the fact that he was bumping us.Jackie and Lizzie stifled a laugh, “did something happen when we were out?” Jackie onc
THE CELEBRATIONMay 19, 2021MADDY"HAPPY BIRTHDAY FINN AND CHLOE!" We all shouted in glee as we blew the horns and boomed the party poppers.There are two cakes for each of the birthday celebrants that are placed in the middle of the counter. Chloe’s birthday cake is a two tiered vanilla cake with different flower designs around it. While Finn’s cake is a simple matcha cake with a cherry on top.Gabby and the others prepared so much food. There are spaghetti, pancit malabon, caldereta, chicken adobo, spring rolls, pork sisig and many more. For dessert, there’s my favorite leche flan that they just ordered, marshmallow hotdogs on sticks for Chloe, and two contain
WARNINGMay 19, 2021MADDYI jerk and I didn’t expect my body to shudder tremendously when I felt his warm breath on my nape. The photos that I saw earlier flashed in my eyes like a flowing water the moment I shut my eyes. Because of what he’s doing, the fear I thought that I will never feel for anyone anymore, came back in just one wrong move by Santi.Fear and disgust mixed together.“Maddy was just curious about you, grandpa.” I heard Zack’s voice and his shaky laugh. Then seconds later I feel Santi’s presence farther away from me when he starts to step backwards.My eyes remained shut, I was in a serious catatonic state, that only my eyes can move. Because
IMPERFECT TIMINGMay 19, 2021MADDYFifteen minutes more before the clock strikes 9pm. After our meal they started drinking beers, ignoring the fact that those were brought by Santi. When I asked them if it’s really a good idea to accept the drinks, they just told me that wasting those beers by ignoring them in front of Santi is more of a wrong move. They don’t want to add more weight to our misunderstandings with him, and since we’re all gonna leave the place later, it’s fine to just put on a mask one last time. But for me I think, they just tried to look reasonable because they wanted to get drunk.Throughout the night my mind is just flying in the theories I created about the possibility of Zack’s grandparents doing such heinous things.
UNHINGEDMay 19, 2021FINNI followed Chloe through the living room, when I noticed how she behaved anxiously in front of other people, I felt a massive amount of curiosity from her. I have also been meaning and wanting to talk to her, I want to know if there’s anything off happening in this house. Maybe it’s a wrong move to ask her, but she has been acting strange since the day we met her. And to add the fact that she’s the only trustworthy living in this house who may have witnessed something… hard to explain.I am aware that she has autism, Zack told us before. I know that people with autism tend to melt down when they are not being understood. But Chloe seems different from the others who have the same mental illness.I noticed tha
DOWN THE HOLE [PART ONE]May 19, 2021MADDYI remained sitting on the end of the bed staring at the closet in front of us. Jackie snores like a bear in a deep slumber. I couldn’t help but to sigh in defeat and slumped myself in the fleecy soft bed out of frustration. I stared at the white ceiling for almost fifteen minutes until I found myself walking towards the closet again. I convinced myself not to pry inside of it anymore but it was a tough battle between my mind and guts. At the end my body absentmindedly chose to take sides in my mind.As I held on to the handles of the wooden closet, I closed my eyes and breathed in and out again and again. When I open my eyes I suddenly step back in a moment of uncertainty. I swallowed hard, shaking my head and tightening fists.
THE CONTINUATION... I gasped for air as hard as I could and slammed closed the photo album, and threw it inside the box. I put my palm on my forehead feeling the cold sweat all over my body as the paranoia attacks me once more because of not knowing what to do next. The commotion outside still didn’t stop just like the clamoring noises inside of this closet. My head is being hammered by different thoughts and emotions and without thinking right I bolted inside of it, slammed my fists on the last box as I mustered all the courage to open it. And when I thought it wouldn’t get any worse I saw lots of stuff used by women--bloody and worn out, dresses, clothes, underwear, and different broken accessories and ornaments as if they were ruined by force. I held out a breath for a second st