My car is parked at my parents' house, right next door, but if I go into the house to grab my purse and keys, I know my mom will only come in after me and try to get me to tell her everything. Instead, I just keep speed-walking - past my parents' house, past the one beyond that, all the way to the end of the street. Only then am I out of sight of the people in the Grants' yard, and only then do I break into a run.I don't know exactly where I'm going - I just let my feet lead the way. Haverton is small enough that I could make it back to the house I rent with Lucy without too much trouble, but that's the first place they'll look for me. I need to be alone right now.Somehow, I end up down by the river. I jog down the overgrown dirt path, trying not to trip over tree roots or overgrown weeds. Note to self - ballet flats are definitely not the best getaway shoes. This time of year the woods here are green and lush and thick, drowning out the sounds of the streets behind me. I rarely se
I'm desperate for a drink."Fine," I say to Alex. "What do I have to do?""Just get out of the water," he replies. "Then I'll give it to you.""Wait - are you afraid I'll drop it in the river? I wasn't the one who got butterfingers during the flag football championship - ""I still maintain that the sun was in my eyes," he says. "But no, that isn't the reason. I'd just prefer to get you out of the water. Just in case.""In case of what?" I cross my arms. "Are you afraid I'm going to hurt myself? It's hard to hurt yourself in a foot and a half of water.""But not impossible."I can tell he's not going to budge on this, so I quickly weigh my options. Which is more important - to feel the cool water rushing around my legs, or to feel the sweet burn of alcohol on my tongue? Today, the alcohol wins.I wade back to the riverbank and step out of the water."I promise I'm okay," I say, reaching out for the flask. "I'm just...just feeling a little crazy, that's all." And like I want to
"I'm not upset about Wes," I say, almost more to myself than to Alex. "I think I'm more upset about the fact that I just made an idiot of myself in front of half the town." I take another swig of whiskey. It's getting easier to swallow each time."Be careful with that, Mae.""I will. I am."He doesn't look like he believes me. "If I'm understanding this right, then Wes was clearly the one at fault. As soon as people hear the full story, they'll turn all their anger on him.""And save all their pity for me. No, thank you. I'd rather just chill here with this whiskey." I turn and walk over to one of the large, flat rocks on the river bank, stepping up onto it in my bare feet and then settling down cross-legged.Alex stays where he is, and I suddenly feel as if all my energy is draining out of me."Really, I appreciate you checking on me," I say quietly. "But you don't need to stay. I don't want you to miss your mom's party. She'll kill me if you do.""She'll understand."His refu
"I never brought Wes down here," I say abruptly. I don't know why, but I need Alex to know that. This was always our place - mine and Alex's. "It didn't seem right. Not that you and I were ever like me and Wes. We weren't romantic or hooking up, I mean." God, this alcohol is making it hard to explain what I mean. Or maybe it's just that Alex - or Xander, or whoever he is now - is making me nervous for some reason.I grab another little rock and toss it into the water, laughing to cover up this weirdness that has settled over me."You know, Lucy still refuses to believe that nothing ever happened between us," I say. "Some people just can't seem to accept the idea that men and women can just be friends." I tilt my head back and look up at the leaves overhead. In my buzzed state, the patterns they make are mind-boggling."None of my guy friends ever believed it either," he says. "Though they liked to tease me about never being able to seal the deal.""And look at you now," I say. "One
Kissing Alex might not be that bad, I tell myself. Weird, maybe. But probably not bad. I mean, the guy dates supermodels now. They're probably just in it for the money, but he can't be that bad a kisser if they stick around for more than a few dates, right? Or do gold diggers not care about that sort of thing? I mean, if I were a gold digger, that would totally still be part of the equation. I don't care how rich a guy is - if he's all drool-y when he kisses, I don't think I'd survive very long in that relationship. And when it came to sex..."Do gold diggers care about sex?" I ask Alex.He blinks. "What?""In a relationship, do they care about the sex and the kissing and all that, or just the money?"He sits up abruptly. "What the heck are you talking about?"The sudden absence of his weight on top of me makes me feel weirdly empty."Weren't we just talking about this?" I say. "About gold diggers and bad kissers and..."He looks at me like I'm possibly insane, which means it wa
When I wake, I feel like I've been sleeping for a hundred years. And also a little like I've been dragged behind a speedboat over rough waters. With a shark gnawing at me for most of the trip."Ugh," I groan, rolling over. My tongue is thick and dry. My head fuzzy. Feels like I definitely had too much to drink last night.Wes stirs beside me. I brush my fingers gently against his arm as I sit up. I'd really like to pull the covers over my head and block out the sunlight pouring in through my bedroom window, but I really, really have to use the bathroom.I stumble to the bathroom, and it takes me a few minutes to find the light switch. Yeah, definitely had a rough night. I can feel it in my bones. Why did Wes let me drink so much? Maybe back in college I could drink all night and feel fine the next morning, but not anymore. I'm definitely too old for this.When I make it to the sink, I cringe at the sight of myself in the mirror. My hair is one massive tangle around my head. There a
I stroll into the kitchen, throwing open the cabinets and fridge. Good - we have the stuff I need to make some chocolate chip pancakes. After I get out the ingredients, I get some coffee going, too. As Lucy likes to say, "When life hands you lemons, make coffee." Things are always easier when you're properly caffeinated.Alex left his mom's birthday barbecue for you, I remind myself as I get out the mixing bowl. Your apology is going to need a lot more than pancakes and coffee.I'll promise to buy him some more whiskey, for starters - though I'm afraid the fancy stuff he drinks now will completely drain my bank account. I'll probably need to do something for his mom, too. Poor Norah is probably wondering what the hell happened."Do I smell coffee?" comes a cheerful voice.When I look up, Lucy is there, her hair up in a messy bun and a terrycloth bathrobe thrown over her tank top and pajama bottoms.Shit. Lucy is normally a late sleeper on the weekends - she works as a waitress at
I can only imagine what my roommate is thinking right now."I had a little too much to drink at Norah's barbecue last night, so Alex helped me home," I say. My face feels like it's on fire. "He was kind enough to stay here and make sure I was okay."Lucy's eyes flick between Alex and me again, and suddenly she breaks into a wide smile."I knew it!" she says. "I knew something was going on! I've told you for years, I said - wait, but what about Wes?"Eventually, I'll get hot enough that I'll spontaneously combust and turn into a Mae-shaped bonfire. "Wes wasn't at the party. Look, Luce - it's sort of complicated. I'm happy to explain everything to you when you get back later - ""You'd better," she says, looking between Alex and me once more. "Not because you aren't an adult who can make her own decisions, but because...well, there's obviously a story here.""I..." I don't know if there's a story. I still have no idea what happened."You're lucky I'm running late," Lucy says with