Chapter 137

SIERRA

The room feels different when it’s quiet.

Mom and Aunt Harper finally let the nurses convince them to get some rest. Lilly lingered the longest, fussing over my blanket, adjusting my pillow, and reminding me to call if I needed anything. She only left when I promised I’d try to sleep.

Now it’s just me, the hum of the machines, and the soft glow of the monitor that casts shifting shadows across the wall.

For a long while, I just lie there, staring at the ceiling. I can still hear the faint echo of the doctor’s words in my head.

It’s strange how calm he sounded saying it. How easily he said "stopped," like it was just a pause, not an ending. But I remember how it felt. Not the physical part… more the absence of it. Like slipping beneath water and realizing, too late, that you can’t make it back up.

A shiver runs through me and I pull the blanket higher.

I almost died. And if it weren’t for those doctors and nurses, my baby and I would be gone.

My hand instinctively moves to my belly. Of course, my stomach is still flat, but that doesn’t stop me from imagining a small bump beneath the hospital gown, a quiet reminder that I’m not just living for me anymore.

“Hey, little one,” I whisper softly, my voice cracking.

I still cling to the dream I had… well, it turned out to be more like a nightmare in the end, but I still remember his face and how he looked like the perfect mix of me and Noah.

Tears fill my eyes again, but this time they’re not from fear. They’re from gratitude, because we are still here when someone clearly didn’t want us to be.

I close my eyes and exhale slowly, listening to the rhythmic beeping beside me. Each one feels like a ticking time bomb because beneath that relief, something else starts to rise… Fear.

Someone wanted me dead. Not scared. Not threatened. Dead. And if they could get that close once, they could try again.

The woman’s face flashes in my mind. That cold, professional calm. The way she moved, like she knew exactly what she was doing, still sends chills down my spine.

I grip the blanket tighter, my pulse beginning to race. I can’t let this happen again. I won’t let this happen again because next time I might not be as lucky.

Maybe Noah was right to keep so many guards around, But I can’t depend on everyone else to save me. I need to take care of myself. I need to figure out how to protect myself and the baby.

Maybe the first step is letting go of everything that leaves me vulnerable.

The thought of work flashes through my mind. After everything that’s happened, it suddenly feels so small compared to what’s at stake.

Maybe I need to stop. At least for now.

I rest a hand over my heart, feeling it beat steady under my palm. “No more risks,” I whisper. “I promise.”

A soft knock breaks through the silence. I glance toward the door, startled.

It opens just enough for a nurse to peek in, smiling gently when she sees I’m awake. “Everything okay in here, sweetheart?”

“Yes,” I whisper, nodding. “Just couldn’t sleep.”

“That’s alright,” she says kindly, stepping inside. “Your body’s been through a lot. It’ll take time.” She checks the monitors, making sure everything looks stable. “Pain level?”

“Manageable,” I say.

“Good.” She adjusts the IV drip slightly, then tucks the blanket more snugly around me. “You did really well today.”

I smile faintly. "Thank you.”

She pats my hand before stepping back. “You rest now, okay? If you need anything, just press the button.”

“Will do, thanks.”

When she leaves, the room feels quiet again, but not in a lonely way. Just peaceful.

I look toward the window. The blinds are half open, and I can see a slice of the city lights shimmering in the distance. It’s past midnight, but I can’t sleep. My body is tired, yet my mind keeps spinning.

My mind wanders to Noah, but I push the thoughts away. It's not the time to think about him and I won't let myself be drowned in the whirlpool that is him. i have more important things to worry about.

My throat tightens when I start thinking of being discharged. I don't know if those bodyguards will still be assigned to me even after I leave, but either way, I need to take some security measures. Maybe Gunner can help with that; after all, he's the one that installed the security system in Lilly's apartment.

He always asked me if he could do the same, but I always brushed him off, saying I don't have anything valuable that would be stolen... I know, what about my work? Well, we aren't allowed to bring our work home for obvious reasons... But now? It's the perfect time to ask for his assistance.

I close my eyes again, trying to breathe through the swirl of emotion. The faint rhythm of the monitor steadies me. Each beep feels like a heartbeat that doesn’t belong just to me anymore.

“I’ll keep you safe,” I whisper softly into the quiet. “No matter what it takes.”

I don’t even realize I’m crying again until a tear slips past my cheek.

I don’t know how long I stay like that. Half awake, half lost in thought, but eventually I do fall asleep with the promise ringing in my head.

I have to keep my baby safe. No matter what it takes, I'll bring him into the world.