ログインTwo rivals. One secret. A dangerous obsession. He wanted peace, but college gave him Ryder Caldwell… and a dangerous love triangle that could ruin everything. College was supposed to be Ollie’s escape, quiet classes, freedom, and a chance to breathe. Then Ryder Caldwell happened. Arrogant, Tattooed and Dangerous. The bad boy of the university who loves to watch Ollie moan. But Ryder isn’t the only storm in his life. Landon Pierce, Ryder’s rival, wants Ollie too, and he’s willing to expose everything to get him. Ollie’s biggest secret? By night, he’s a masked star on OnlyFans. And when the truth comes out, it won’t just ruin him… it might destroy everyone who touches him.
もっと見るCHAPTER ONE:
Ollie’s POV
If staring at Ryder Caldwell counted as a full-time job, I’d already be employee of the month.
It wasn’t like I wanted to. My eyes just… drifted. Always. They found him across the quad, lounging with his teammates, sunglasses low on his nose like he thought he was some rockstar. They found him in the student lounge, grinning like the sun itself had appointed him king of the universe. And they found him here, now, at the café table in the middle of campus, his tattooed arm around Serena Miller—aka his latest plastic Barbie.
He was laughing. Of course he was. Everything was always funny to Ryder.
And God, did I hate him for it.
Hate him for the tattoos peeking out from under his shirt sleeves. Hate him for the way his messy brown hair fell across his forehead like it was staged for a photoshoot. Hate him for the way he looked like he owned everything he touched.
And I especially hated that my stomach gave this annoying little flip every time I saw him.
“You’re doing it again,” Allison said, voice sing-songy beside me.
I snapped my head toward her. “Doing what?”
“Staring at Ryder like you’re planning to either kill him or kiss him. Honestly, it’s hard to tell sometimes.”
I choked on my iced coffee. “Excuse me?”
She grinned like a cat with cream. “Don’t act innocent. I’ve been your best friend since high school. I know what you're saying.”
“I don’t…..”
“......like him?” She finished for me. “Yeah, sure. That’s why you’ve been watching him for the last ten minutes instead of reading your notes.”
I slammed my notebook shut, cheeks burning. “I can’t wait to graduate and never see his face again.”
Allison leaned her chin in her hand. “Uh-huh. Keep telling yourself that.”
I groaned, running a hand through my hair. Allison wasn’t just my best friend, she was also annoyingly observant. And lately, she’d gotten even bolder since she’d started dating Mark Jensen, one of the Red Falcons’ golden boys. Which also meant she was orbiting Ryder’s world now, whether I liked it or not.
And I really didn’t.
“I still can’t believe you’re dating Mark,” I muttered.
Her eyes softened, but she smiled. “I like him, Ollie. He’s sweet. He’s not Ryder, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“Everything revolves around Ryder,” I said darkly.
She rolled her eyes. “Not everything.” Then she straightened, suddenly bright. “Speaking of, you’re coming with me tonight.”
“To what?”
“The afterparty, duh. The Falcons beat the Wildcats. It’s a huge deal. There’ll be music, drinks, half the campus…”
“No thanks.”
She groaned. “Ollie. Please. For me? It’s important. Mark wants me there. I want you there. You’ll have fun.”
“Being surrounded by drunken athletes and their groupies? Yeah, sounds like a blast.”
“You can at least pretend. You don’t have to talk to Ryder.”
I snorted. “As if that’s possible.”
But she begged and she bargained and eventually bribed me with Taco Bell. Which is how I ended up, several hours later, standing in the doorway of a sweaty, overcrowded frat house with bass thundering through my chest and the smell of spilled beer in the air.
Allison looked radiant, her hand tucked into Mark’s as he led us deeper into the chaos. Mark was tall, broad-shouldered, and clearly proud of the jersey he still wore. He smiled down at her like she was the only one in the room. I tried not to gag.
And then I saw him.
Ryder.
He stood in the center of the living room, a red cup in hand, tattoos crawling up his forearm, black shirt clinging to him like sin itself. His hair was messy in that perfect way, and he wore that signature smirk like it was carved into his face. Serena clung to his side, her nails digging into his shirt like she was afraid he’d vanish if she let go.
He looked untouchable. Like he owned this place. And everyone else seemed to agree.
“Hey, Ollie,” Mark said, pulling me from my trance. “Glad you came, man.”
I nodded stiffly. “Yeah. Sure.”
But Ryder’s eyes flicked across the room then, landing right on me. And I swear, his smirk widened like he’d just found his evening’s entertainment.
Shit.
Within minutes, he was striding over, Serena trailing along like a shadow. A few of his teammates followed, eager to watch. My stomach sank.
“Well, well,” Ryder drawled, stopping in front of me. He towered just enough to remind me how small I was compared to him. “Didn’t expect to see you here, Oliver.”
I hated the way he said my full name, like he was mocking me just by pronouncing it.
“It’s Ollie,” I muttered.
He smirked. “Right. Ollie. Forgot.” He tilted his head, tattoos shifting on his skin as he raised his cup. “What are you doing here? This isn’t really your scene, is it? No book club meetings tonight?”
A few of his teammates snickered. Heat crept up my neck.
“I came with Allison,” I said tightly.
His gaze flicked to her, then back to me. “Of course. Makes sense. She’s dating Mark now.” He clapped Mark on the shoulder. “Congrats, bro. She’s way too hot for you.”
Mark laughed awkwardly. Allison forced a smile, clearly torn between punching Ryder and keeping the peace.
Then Serena leaned forward, eyes scanning me up and down like I was something stuck to her shoe. “Aw, Ryder, don’t be mean. He looks… What's the word? Out of place.”
“Lost,” Ryder supplied smoothly, his smirk deepening.
“Exactly.” Serena giggled, pressing a kiss to his jaw.
Laughter rippled through the group. My fists clenched at my sides.
“You know what?” Ryder said suddenly, raising his voice so the people around us could hear. “I think Ollie needs a drink. He looks thirsty.”
Before I could respond, he plucked a cup from a passing table and shoved it into my hand. Beer sloshed over the edge, dripping onto my shirt.
The group roared with laughter.
“Oops,” Ryder said, not sounding sorry at all. “Guess you’ll need to wash that later. Or maybe you like the drowned-rat look. Brings back memories, doesn’t it?”
My chest tightened. He remembered our freshman year. The spilled beer. The humiliation that haunted me. He hadn’t forgotten, he’d been waiting to use it again.
“Ryder, cut it out,” Allison snapped, stepping forward.
He smirked at her, unbothered. “Relax, sweetheart. We’re just having fun.”
“Fun at my best friend’s expense?”
Ryder’s eyes locked on mine, sharp and gleaming. “He can handle it. Can’t you, Ollie?”
Every nerve in my body screamed to walk away, to not give him the satisfaction. But my mouth betrayed me.
“Go to hell,” I muttered.
The crowd “ooohed,” like we were kids on a playground. Ryder’s smirk sharpened.
“Feisty,” he said. “I like it.”
I shoved past him, heart pounding, face burning with shame. The sound of his laugh followed me, echoing in my head long after I’d disappeared into the crowd.
And I hated that underneath the anger, underneath the humiliation, my chest still tightened at the sound.
CHAPTER 155:Ollie’s POVI wake up to light.Not the sharp kind that hurts my eyes. The soft kind. The kind that feels like it is touching me instead of attacking me.Ryder is still asleep.He lies on his back, one arm thrown over his head. His chest rises and falls slow and steady. I listen to it for a while, like it is music. Like if I stop listening, something bad will happen.I don’t move at first.I’m scared to.Sometimes when things feel too calm, my body waits for the crash. For shouting. For fear. For the sound of a door slamming. My brain tells me peace is temporary.But nothing happens.Ryder doesn’t disappear. The room doesn’t change. The light stays soft.So I move.Slowly, I sit up and pull the blanket around me. My heart feels heavy but not broken. More like tired. Like it ran too far yesterday and needs to rest today.I look at Ryder again.He looks different when he sleeps. Less sharp. Less guarded. Just… human.I wonder what he dreams about.I wonder if I’m in them.I
CHAPTER 154:Ryder’s POVI wake before Ollie does.The rain is gone. Morning light slips through the curtains, pale and quiet. The room feels still, like the world is holding its breath.Ollie is curled on his side, facing me. His hair falls into his eyes. His mouth is slightly open when he sleeps, like he forgot to close it. One arm is wrapped around the pillow, but his leg is thrown over mine like he doesn’t want me to move.I don’t.I lie there and watch him breathe.Slow in. Slow out.For a long time, I was scared to sleep. Every night felt like a test. Would he wake up screaming? Would he push me away? Would he disappear back into himself?Last night, he slept through.That feels like a miracle.I reach out and brush his hair away from his face. My touch is light, like I’m afraid I might break him.He stirs. His brow tightens for a second.“Ollie,” I whisper.He hums softly and turns his face into the pillow.I smile before I can stop myself.He looks peaceful. Not running. Not h
CHAPTER 153:Ollie's POV.I wake up to the sound of rain.Not heavy rain. Just soft tapping against the window, like someone knocking gently and waiting to be let in.For a second, I don’t know where I am.My body feels warm. Safe. My cheek is pressed against something solid.Ryder.His arm is around my waist. His chest rises and falls under my ear. His heart beats slow and steady, like it has nowhere else to be.I close my eyes again.I don’t want to move.The past weeks have been full of waking up alone. Full of panic. Full of that sharp fear that sits in your stomach before your brain even understands it.But right now, there is no fear.Just rain. And Ryder. And this quiet moment where nothing hurts.I breathe in slowly.His scent is familiar. Soap and coffee and something that is just him. It makes my chest ache in a good way.I shift a little, and he stirs.“Ollie?” he murmurs, still half asleep.“I’m here,” I whisper.His arm tightens around me like his body did it before his m
CHAPTER 152:RYDER'S POV.I wake up before the sun.It is still dark, that soft gray hour when the world feels like it is holding its breath. The house is quiet except for the hum of the fridge and the slow sound of Ollie’s breathing beside me.For a second, I just lie there and listen to him.Last night did not end in shouting. It did not end in anger. It ended in something worse and better at the same time—truth. Ollie cried in my arms until his body went heavy with sleep. I stayed awake longer than I should have, watching his face, afraid that if I slept, I would miss something. Afraid he would disappear.I turn my head and look at him now.He is curled on his side, knees drawn up, hands tucked under his chin like a child. His hair falls into his eyes. There is a faint bruise still on his cheek. It is lighter now, but I see it every time I look at him.I reach out slowly, careful not to wake him, and brush his hair back.My chest tightens.I have fought men bigger than me. I have s
CHAPTER 139 — INTO THE RAINRyder’s POVThe rain hit us like cold needles, sharp and fast, soaking through my clothes in seconds. The storm was loud, so loud it swallowed most sounds, but even through all that noise, I could still hear Ollie’s breathing behind me. Fast. Nervous. Unsteady. His hand
Chapter 135 – Breath in the DarkRyder’s POVThe metallic click froze every part of me. The sound did not belong in this house, not at this hour, not with the storm drowning everything outside. It was the kind of sound I only heard when someone meant to break in quietly, hoping the thunder would co
CHAPTER 147 — WHAT WE SURVIVERyder’s POVThe silence after violence is always the worst part.It crept in slowly, heavy and thick, like the world was holding its breath to see what would happen next. The echoes of gunfire were gone. The smell of smoke still hung in the air, mixed with oil, dust, a
CHAPTER 141 — WHAT I BECOME WITHOUT YOURyder’s POVThe door closed behind Ollie with a sound I will hear for the rest of my life.Metal against metal. Final. Cold.I stood there long after it happened, my body locked in place like if I didn’t move, the moment might undo itself. My hands were still
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