Chapter 2

Only swords and sparring had ever interested her, and ledgers gave her headaches.

She wouldn't read them closely, let alone notice the separation agreement I'd secretly drafted and tucked at the bottom of the stack.

As long as she stamped it with her royal seal and sent it to the palace, we'd be free to go our separate ways and each find our own happiness.

I stood quietly off to the side, folding fan in hand, not the least bit nervous.

"If Your Highness finds all this too much, I could take some of it off Master Lucian's hands."

Helena would never agree.

I knew she was afraid Lucian would be bullied, so she wanted to give him the best of everything.

Sure enough, her expression stiffened. Without even looking, she stamped her royal seal on the documents one by one.

"Julian, I'd like to let you keep running the household, but you've worked far too hard these past few years.

"The physician said you need to rest. We may still have a chance to have a child."

A child. How touching.

She was already carrying another man's baby. Why would she care about ours?

I put away the separation agreement bearing her seal and went to the palace.

Less than an hour later, the Emperor's chamberlain came out.

"His Majesty has approved the separation. The decree will be issued in a month. You may go home."

I blinked, almost stunned by how smoothly it had gone.

As I was leaving, the chamberlain called me back, his kind voice tinged with sympathy.

"There's something... I think you should know.

"The court physician examined the calming tea you brought last time. It contains a poison that leaves a man unable to father children.

"It has no color and no taste, and it can only be found in the bitter cold lands of the northwest.

"A man who takes it long enough will never be able to have children..."

He spoke softly, but my mind went blank.

Poison?

A poison found only in the frozen northwest?

Helena had blended that calming tea for me herself. I'd been drinking it for three years.

Three whole years, and I'd spent every one of them under everyone's contempt.

The whole capital knew the princess had no children because of her husband.

I'd gone from physician to physician through a storm of mockery, trampling my pride as a man into the dirt.

And it was Helena who'd told me it didn't matter, that all she wanted was the two of us for the rest of our lives, that she didn't care whether we had children or not, and that having me was enough.

My heart shattered into pieces.

So this was what her vows had been worth.

So this was the woman I'd loved for five years.

Back at the princess's residence, I realized I'd missed one of the ledgers.

Not wanting to cause any more trouble, I took it straight to the study.

The moment I walked in, I saw letters scattered across the desk.

"Missing you, I burn like a candle, my heart melting as I weep."

"Though we have no wings to fly to each other, our hearts beat as one."

...

Every line was full of a lover's sweetness.

I gave them a cold glance and turned to go.

As I turned, I accidentally knocked the letter box off the desk.

Three years of marriage. One thousand, eight hundred and twenty-five letters.

They'd been carrying on behind my back every single day, even on our wedding night.

"Just the two of us, for the rest of our lives."

As I murmured the line Helena always used to say, I understood.

This marriage she'd spent three years pretending to cherish had been nothing but a mirage.

Thankfully, there was only one month left until the Emperor granted the separation.

And the day Helena was set to marry Lucian would be that very same day.

Twenty days remained until the Emperor's decree.

Helena came home later and later.

A maid told me Helena had been bringing Lucian to every gathering she could, whether it was a poetry salon at the Royal Tutor's estate or the christening of the earl's youngest son.

She'd even found ways to show Lucian off at the palace spring banquet, where men from outside the royal family weren't allowed.

I knew it was the fastest way for Lucian to work his way into the capital's high society.